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I am beginning to believe not eat, an amazingly massive that it doubles in the night when amount of parsley. For a bitter no one is looking. And, on top of that, the herb, it's a hardy thing; but once I've thrown a handful into the darned stuff won't spoil. It isn't soup and decorated a couple of soggy. It still smells great. Soon fruit cups, I really don't have it will take on a separate identi- ty as an individual life form, and much need for it. Most of the other seder things commandeer the house. I can see go the way of the wind. I pitch the movie now: The Charoset the salt water and the lamb Monster: The Blob That Ate Jew- bones; no utility there. We eat ish Suburbia. Next year, I won't start with the eggs on the spot, as well as the newly ceremonial orange — two dozen apples. Next year, I'll added to the plate to commem- start with two apples. But that's orate the role of women in the what I said last year. We should note how fortunate Exodus saga. We finish the other odds and we are, how blessed, to have 44 ends, but I always have a vat of enough extra food to make jokes about it. How aware we are that charoset. The charoset is the most nov- this is the reason we can't bring el, best tasting compound in the ourselves to throw anything out. world at the seder. I make two At this holiday of freedom, we do enormous bowls of it as soon as appreciate how wonderful it is the kitchen is Pesachdik, and I to celebrate freedom from want keep my kiddy helpers from and hunger. But now that I have ac- scarfing it all on the spot. Wrong again, Mommy-0. I should have knowledged the obvious, help given them soup spoons and told me out. Have a little piece of veal them to dig in and eat up be- with a big dollop of horseradish. cause after the seders I will have Take a bowl of cereal. 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Grand River Ave. Phone (313) 349-2000 The Please, I'm Begging You An unscientific history of schnorring; just in time for Purim. re DR. KENNETH W. STEIN SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH NEWS ecently I read an article in the Israeli daily newspaper Ma'ariv that claimed snor- • g is genetic. So in honor of Purim, I changed a couple of let- ters and added a few lines. By the way, for the Yiddishly challenged, a schnorrer is some- one always asking for money. Here goes: At a medical conference in Haifa attended by fund-raisers from around the world, Professor Tikun Olam, deacon of the Inter- national Association of Develop- ment Officers and Director of the Schnorring Study laboratory, said, "schnorring is a genetic and in- herited Jewish phenomenon." However, said Olam, the Mesah u-Matan professor of soci- ology at the Jessica and Simon Chabad School of Resurgent Jew- ish Identity, "while schnorring is undoubtedly genetic, successful schnoningis a science." lin 20% OFF VOUCHER Handed out — good towards swingset Purchase by 4/5/97. • Largest selection of Play- systems in Tri County Area. • Knowledgeable staff Demos on safety eildee4 Viitldfletett 3947 ‘Al. 12 Mile –Lierkley . 5 40, . 96 Exit Greenfie14, N, to12 MIL, 3 Eilke, E. of G*Oelii . M-5at. 10.5:30, Fri. 10.8 (510) 543 3115 - Dr. Kenneth W. Stein, is head of Emory University's Middle East Research Program. The study proved that if even one parent is a schnorrer, the chances are 11 times higher that the offs-piing, too, will schnorr. The study used 50 families with at least one of each pair a genetic schnorrer. Uncommonly surprising, the study concluded that 12 to 14 per- cent of the total population en- gages in professional schnorring. The results are backed up by studies undertaken in Bnei Brak, Great Neck, Mea Shearim, and Shaker Heights. It was discovered that the source of schnorring was not just laziness, but found to be in the part of the brain that con- trols giving and tatting. Olam reported that children of longtime schnorrers have a high- er probability of engaging in schnorringand should be checked and prevented from excessive weight gain. Those with the re- gressive and recessive schnor- ringgene have initiated support groups to understand why their genetic make-up denied them this cherished gene. • 4