ID IFIL I MI

New policy to
take effect for the
1997-98
school year.

CARLA SCHWARTZKOPF
FASHION POLICEWOMAN

Cr)

LU

SPOOF

Hillel
Has De,SigilS On New
Unit 01111S

After much committee, sub-com-
mittee and sub-sub-committee
discussion, Hillel Day School has
instituted a new uniform policy
for students for the 1997-98
school year.
According to school president
Dr. Marcy Berealsky, the new
uniform will include black an-
kle-sweeping robes, ornate bibs
and beaded hoods, for both boys
and girls.
"The style is in keeping with
our policy on modesty," she said.
The uniforms come complete
with a basket-style hat fitted
with candles, a design which will also enable
the school to turn off the lights and thus save
on electricity bills. The hat is part of a move to
cut operating costs, which will translate to low-
er tuition increases.
Because of the change, the students will not
have to forgo using their automatic flush toi-
lets, a target of the cost cutters. Also spared by
the bean counters is the wall-to-wall carpet-
ing in all of the school's hallways.
"We pride ourselves in being the only school
in the country with automatic flush toilets, so
being able to keep them is quite a blessing,"
said headmaster Dr. Mark Frown, noting that
even the swanky Townsend Hotel does not
boast such amenities.
When asked if there was any consideration
given to the potential danger of having the chil-
dren wear burning candles, Dr. Berealski said,
"Hey, we've got to cut corners somewhere."
"Besides, it will kinda be like Shaarey Zedek
on the High Holidays. You know, when it is
supposed to be a solemn moment and the kids
get up on the bimah and do hand puppetry us-
ing their flashlights and scream obscenities.
The kids will love it."

(J.)

LU

O

CC
LU

LU

00

Two Hillel students
model the latest
uniform fashions.

