here is one thing I
love about Monday
mornings.
After listening to
the Barney song 600
times during the weekend and
wrestling with my kid, my hus-
band and our three dogs to get out
the door — only to face deadlines
at work — I sometimes can't wait
to get stuck in rush-hour traffic.
I almost hope somebody gets into
an accident to bring all drivers to
a halt.
No, I am not a sadist. No, I
don't particularly like driving my
very suburban, very bland but
very safe Jeep Grand Cherokee.
But driving to work is the only
time I am truly alone and able to
truly relax. It is then that I crank
up 97.1 WYST-FM. For it is there
that I find Howard.
Yes, I am a woman. Yes, I
know some people believe he is a
"misogynist pig." But I just can't
help myself.
Don't tell my husband, but I
love Howard Stem.
There is something not safe,
decidedly unsuburban and posi-
tively anarchic about Howard
Stem. He says what he thinks,
and he makes me laugh while he
is doing it. Maybe it is just be-
cause he is a half-Jewish guy with
great hair. But I am wild about
him.
So, when I had the chance to
participate in a press conference
with the King of All Media, I
couldn't say no. I made the time
to be there. And I wasn't disap-
pointed with him.
The local media, however, was
disappointing. After all, this was
supposed to be a press conference.
We were supposed to ask the
questions.
First, there was the publisher

t

of the Out Post, a publication
catering to the homosexual scene
in the area. That guy took ques-
tions from Howard about his sex-
ual preference and whether or not
he was an "ass man." He also
asked an obvious question about
why Howard was attracted to les-
bians. .
Two other reporters from local
news organizations asked softball
questions before handing the mi-
crophone back to the moderator.
It appeared as though the press
conference was going to end.
I wanted more. I wanted to
hear Howard talk about Detroit.
So I motioned for the micro-
phone. It was my turn with
Howard. I was introduced with
my publication.
"A Jew," Howard leered. "A
Jewess."
It was as if he had said, "A god,
a goddess." A nervous energy ran
through me as I realized he was
talking to me. I became oblivious
to all of the other reporters in the
room.
"Are you attractive?' he asked.
I didn't know what to say. Usu-
ally, people don't ask that ques-
tion unless they're calling a phone
sex line and I certain-
Howard
ly didn't want to go
Stern: A
there. I could picture
guy
myself walking into Jewish
with great
The Jewish News and
hair?
seeing my belongings
packed in a box by the front door.
So, it was a little hard to de-
scribe myself to Howard on a na-
tional radio show for fear he
would launch into me. Thankful-
ly, the moderator told Howard
that I was indeed attractive and
that he would like me.
Did I have a nose job? Was I
married? Was I a yenta? Was my
husband a doctor or a lawyer, and

A Jewish News reporter goes one on
one with America's shock jock.

08

JILL DAVIDSON SKLAR STAFF WRITER

PHOTOS COURTESY OF PARAMOU NT PI CTURES CORP.

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