PEOPLE SPEAK page 23

"Then I'm not giving to the Fed-
eration this year on Super Sun-
day."
When I responded, "We're in-
dependent of the Federation, but
think they deserve your support,"
one person said, "That just proves
that you are arrogant and influ-_,
enced by powerful people and or-
ganizations."

An informal survey
of Jewish newspaper
readers is a bit
scary.

* In the center study, slightly
more than half of the respondents
believed that journalists should
have a license to practice their pro-
fession, much like doctors and
lawyers.
Meanwhile, in the Jewish read-
ers survey, 33 percent of the doc-
tors and lawyers said, "If I had a
choice, I'd be an underpaid jour-
nalist. Gotta go. Time for
surgery/court, then golf."
Of course, as with most studies,
these statistics mean whatever
you want. So to get a fresh view
on them, I turned to a colleague.
He said, "Hmm. Slow news
week again?" 0

Don't Mention It

If you're happy and you know it, just hush.

ERICA MEYER RAUZIN SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH NEWS

aution. Watch what you
say. You might undo some-
thing important.
I have been traveling
under a strange new cloud re-
cently, like the little man in L'il
Abner whose name was spelled
entirely with consonants. The
minute I notice something going
right, it goes wrong.
This is a wide-ranging phe-
nomenon.
When I was giving myself a
manicure just before a big party,
I had the random thought that
for perhaps the first time in mem-
ory, all my nails were the same,
nicely rounded, slightly long,
length. It looked perfectly ele-
gant. I am, after all, raising three
children, an occupation that in-
volves heavy lifting and lots of
mess. It is not conducive to main-
taining perfect fingernails, not
that such an achievement has
been a ranking priority. But this
one evening's ten-fingered ac-
complishment did catch my at-

C

tention. I never should have no-
ticed.
The nails didn't survive the
evening: the first one to go
snapped before we ever got out of
the house, snagged on my purse,
and was gone. Of course.
I noticed that my herbs were
growing, and the next day, the
gardener mowed the herb patch.
Of course.
I congratulated myself that af-
ter some years of building up a
collection of blue glass dishes, I
finally had enough dairy pieces
to go around.
Ten minutes later, I dropped
and broke a good meat platter,
thus launching a whole new
quest to, once again, search for a
special piece in a discontinued
pattern. We selected this china
when we were engaged (some 17
years ago) because we loved the
spiffy pattern, a pattern the man-
ufacturer discontinued before our
first anniversary.
I'll muddle through somehow

without the meat platter, but I
can't help but think that if I had
refrained from ever thinking
about dishes or reaching any con-
clusions, it never would have bro-
ken.
This understanding follows an
earlier perception that my dairy
dishes are jinxed by the same ge-
nie. If I say anything at all about
them, something breaks. This set
once included six exquisite gob-
lets, with elegant, thin-walled,
clear crystal bowls mounted atop
delicately twisted, blue glass
stems. They were an end of sea-
son, out of stock, out of produc-
tion, super buy and I was just
crazy about them. Then, one
night as I poured wine during a
dinner party, someone admired
the goblets and I mentioned that
they were the last of their kind.
The first one got broken before
the wine bottle was empty. Worse
yet, a second victim followed it
scant weeks later, after I was
dumb enough to repeat a similar
remark in response to similar
praise at another company din-
ner.
I should have learned my les-
son the first time, because in both
cases the breaker was a male din-
ner guest who ended up even
more embarrassed than he would
have been at breaking an ordi-
nary glass. I had to backtrack so

far I almost fell out the kit
door and onto the path that4
right to the garbage cans. Ii
abject. Both men sent blueg4
replacement gifts within dkl
one a set of wine stems, unfit
other a pitcher. I can't useeill
gift without major league
that I made two friends feel
about some material object
Meanwhile, I have learnedthe
obvious lesson: just don't mentior
such things. As for the remMt•
ing four goblets, you mightsi
well come over and throw them
against the wall, because I docf
think I'll ever use them againh
not even sure I still like then
Learn from me: if you fro
something breakable you*
really like, just tuck it away
don't tell any elaborate storia
about it. At least, not twice.
By the same token, if yourre
is running great, don't mentis
it. If you're really thrilled sit
your landscaping, don't brigi
up. If your kids are making*
derful grades, praise thent,b
don't point out any trends. Nth
stock market is going yourwk,
laugh all the way to the bank,te
don't dare tell anybody.
So if you're happy and p:
know it, just hush. I won'tbeli
responsible for loose lips, whit
sink ships—and don't do and
for glassware either. 0

AJB-milsirs3

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