It's too soon to be dating just yet. There's just too much to work out. How about the
anger with God? How about the reminders, the daily thoughts?
Caring Community at Temple Israel.
On any given day, these scenes repeat themselves in the classrooms and corridors
of the temple. It's something that brings to life the teachings that happen in the sanc-
tuary on Shabbat. The light, the Torah, the fruit of the vine, the family, the sorrow,
the pain, and, yet, the hope.
Caring Community started 16 years ago when several Temple Israel members were
dealing with the deaths of people they loved. They wanted a place to go to talk about
their losses. But they wanted that place to remain within the confines of their tem-
ple.
Caring Community became a type of ombudsman, according to Dr. Nancy Gad-
Harf, Temple Israel's director of programming and development. "If someone in the
community or the congregation felt a need to serve a particular group, Caring Com-
munity took knowledge of that fact," said Dr. Gad-Harf.
Over the years, Temple Israel has hosted support groups for cancer patients and
their families, divorce and family support, Alcoholics Anonymous and Al-Anon groups,
bereavement classes, groups for the families of those with Alzheimer's disease and
others.
"Our clergy and our board do not believe in the word 'no,' " said Dr. Gad-Hart. "Their
philosophy of life is that there are challenges and puzzles. Our mission is to find the

Barbara Bockoff
worked to start a
Temple Israel
support group for
people with
disabilities 14
years ago.

MUN ES

puzzle pieces, put them together and create solutions.
"We might not be able to solve the problems of bereavement, but we can teach
people how to grieve Jewishly."
The ability to add to our repertoires and learn about life. This is what therapist Edie
Pernick talks about to the group for the disabled. Barbara Bockoff and therapist Ani-
ta Haenick facilitate.
Fourteen years ago, Ms. Bockoff went a long way toward founding this particular
group. She was diagnosed with syringomyelia, a congenital disease, when a cyst
was found inside her spinal cord. She gets around in a wheelchair quite nicely. What
is really nice, however, is her uplifting personality and positive drive.
"I wanted to have an area where these people have a place, where people with dis-
abilities could come," said Ms. Bockoff. "I think it goes back 14 years ago when I was
sitting trying to deal with all the things I had to deal with. I was dealing with my
situation, still with children to raise and a marriage in destruction. I felt alone, like
I was the only one with this problem.
"Growing up, I never remembered anyone in a wheelchair. But now, people forget
I'm in a wheelchair. I fade in. Where my heart goes out is to the people who are se-
verely disabled. But disability is not a stigma anymore; it's a fact of life."
Renee Simon never saw herself as a puzzle piece. If anyone in the room that night
knows about adding to life's repertoire, it is the woman known as "Sunshine."
She is the one dressed as a clown. She wears the makeup, and she looks kind of sad.
Yet, what drives her is a forceful desire to make others feel better, to be happy.
For years, Sunny Simon was the hospitality chairman for Temple Israel's Solo Sin-
gles group. A former teacher, she is a successful account executive for Craig Richard
Promotions. She almost died when her car caught a patch of ice in Bloomfield Hills
on Opdyke Road. She was pulled from the driver's side window and had to have her
left leg reattached.

Temple Israel has
opened its doors to
the disabled, the
bereaved, the
divorced and others.

PHIL JACOBS EDITOR

GLENN TRIEST PHOTOGRAPHER

