C

Things are all
quiet on the
hemorrhaged
vocal cord
front.

110 TO B Y GI F NN TIII

Didn'
You
Hear
What I
Wrote?

The paper must go on. While under strict "no-talking"
orders due to a hemorrhage on her right vocal cord, Jewish
News Arts & Entertainment Editor Julie Yolles conducts a
one-sided interview with Broadway actor Peter Birkenhead.
Complete with 10 pages of typewritten questions, a laptop
computer to type follow-up questions and two Orange
Cream Coolers from Olga's, Yolles' interview would end up
sounding like a 45-minute Peter Birkenhead monologue on
her tape recorder.

an we talk?
time supply of nausea-inducing medications; Webber musical. He starred in the title role
NO, that's the problem — a very big prob-
and resigned to the sheer torture and unbe- for two years on the American tour as well as
lem.
lievable inconvenience of schlepping around having appeared on Broadway in Grease. Har-
When the tragic news first came over the notepads and felt pens in every decorator size ris is slated to play the role through Sept. 24
fax from Livent Entertainment, the produc- and color to communicate with the garrulous when Osmond is expected to return and fin-
er of Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor world, what is Livent and the Fox Theatre to ish the run.
Dreamcoat, that Donny Osmond had a he- do?
Patrons who wish to exchange their tick-
morrhage on his vocal cord,
Go on with the show, of course. With Sam ets for another performance on an availabil-
my first reaction was, "Can
Harris as the new Dreamboat — I mean, ity basis may do so at the point of purchase,
you believe it? Donny Os-
Dreamcoat.
prior to the scheduled show date on the orig-
mond and I are plagued with
Harris is no stranger to the Andrew Lloyd inal ticket. ❑
the same, exact pain-in-the-
throat ailment."
Could this be puppy love?
Then, my arts and enter-
tainment editor mode kicked
JULIE YOLLES
in. "Stop the presses," I urged,
computer-generated, notes and carry them
ARTS &
onny, while you're home conva-
a request that didn't go over
with you at all times. Chances are you'll hear
ENTERTAINMENT
lescing, watching the "Rosie O'Don-
particularly well in the pro-
the same questions over and over, and you can
EDITOR
nell Show," here's a couple of tips
duction department due to
just reference back your notes from a previous
from a fellow hemorrhaged vocal
our High Holiday early dead-
conversation.
cord-impaired, speechless wonder:
lines.
Initially, I had planned to re-run
1. You might be able to claim writer's cramp un- 4. When people scream back their responses to
our theater critic Michael Margolin's
you, as if you were deaf just write back, us-
der Workman's Comp. After all, how easy is it
review ofJoseph from when it played
ing your felt tip, "I can hear perfectly fine, I
going to be to grip those jail cell bars at
at the Masonic in December.
just can't speak."
Pharaoh's?
"Joseph didn't miss any theatri-
cal trick known to man, Broadway,
5. Let your spouse enjoy getting in the last word,
Las Vegas or the Follies Bergere," 2. Never, never clear your throat or you could
for a change. My husband, Ron, is getting a
end up being permanently ferklempt — just
Margolin wrote, with particular ac-
sympathetic kick out of this.
ask Linda Richman.
colades paid to Osmond.
6. If you're ever cast to play Helen Keller in drag,
"Three out of four bagels for the
3. Felt pens and spiral-bound notepads are eas-
you'll be all set.
blockbuster mega-musical," conclud-
ier to use than ballpoint to get the words out
ed Margolin.
quicker.
Well, Donny, (NOT) talk to you soon.
But now, with Donny home in
Utah nursing his cords on bland, un-
4. Save all your personally scribbled, as well as
—Julie Yolles
appetizing food; bloated up on a life-

Let's Get Vocal About it

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