Editor's Notebook

Community Views

A Lesson On Mothering
From Fleischman's Resident Nom

The Bridge To Peace
Under Reconstruction

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PHIL JACOBS EDITOR 1

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C,i30)104 Afi

bent over and gave this lady a don't have around them. It's what
they do have that counts."
hug.
Sunday is Mother's Day. Some
As she walked away, the name
"Carol," "Carol," was being called of Ms. Rosenberg's clients won't
out by several other residents. It receive flowers, a phone call or a
reminded me of a teacher walk- visit from anyone. Ms. Rosenberg
ing through a day-care center said that if anyone wishes to vol-
with children saying her name unteer and visit on Mother's Day,
and pulling on an arm or hang- a call to 661-2999 would be ap-
preciated. Fleischman is hosting
ing on a leg.
Carol stopped and talked to a 1:30 p.m. tea followed by a Nan-
each and every person. It was the cy Gurwin musical production at
first time I saw this administra- 2:30.
Even though she mothers her
tor outside of "official" business.
The real official business had just clients, Ms. Rosenberg doesn't see
taken place. They all knew Car- herself in that role.
"I'm in my 50s, they are in their
ol's name. She knew all of their
80s," she said. "I am young to
names as well.
In Carol Rosenberg's office them, and I respect them. I feel
hang the words, "Where There's like I'm a gatekeeper."
There's more
here. Ms. Rosen-
berg's father died
when she was only
9 years old. She is
compassionate in
his memory, be-
cause she says, "I
didn't get an op-
portunity to see
my dad get old."
She also had
the
experience of
The Jewish News
having her grand-
and the profes-
mother, Sara Toba
sional staff of Bor-
Parr, live with the
man took place in
family after her fa-
an office some-
ther's death. Her
where down the
mother, Lillian,
85, is alive and
During these
still a major influ-
times, I met Carol
ence. All of these
Rosenberg. She
factors figure in
was on staff at
her work with the
JHA, and behind
aged.
those closed doors
"What can I tell
she would always
you?"
she said.
put a positive spin
"They like me;
on what seemed to
they trust me. I
be a worsening sit-
tell them the
uation. In this
truth. I don't in-
business, it's some-
fantilize them.
times easy to get
They want the
numb to or even to
whole story and
ignore the positive Carol Rosenberg: Mothering the mothers and fathers of Jewish Detroit.
they get it."
as being too much
With all of this comes respect,
Life, There Should Be Dignity."
part of the company line.
Carol Rosenberg didn't always This is what Ms. Rosenberg gives, but also comes fear. Ms. Rosen-
have a smile on her face when as Fleischman administrator, to berg worries about the residents
talking to the editor of The Jew- her residents. It's not for show, who have been left alone by their
ish News. She was worried, some- and it has nothing to do with pos- families. But she also worries, to
times skeptical that we weren't itive spins. This is exactly the way a lesser extreme, what it will be
always seeing the whole story. the native Detroiter and mother like for her to get old one day.
"Who's going to be around to
of three looks at life.
Then something happened.
I was invited on a tour of the Just because her clients are have fun with me?," she asks. "I
Fleischman Residence. Several older does not mean their lives see so many different reasons for
visiting Israeli mayors from the are over. being here. But the most impor-
Central Galilee were in town as 'There's a person inside," says tant thing is that this is part of
part of the Partnership 2000 ex- Ms. Rosenberg. "They are old in life and it's the right thing."
change program with which Fed- face and body, but they see yel- Don't let her kid you. She is
eration is heavily involved. low and blue as green. It's very firm and compassionate. She
During the tour, I had to make tough getting old. The losses of would take them all home with
a phone call, so I left the group. loved ones these people face make her if she could.
She mothers them.
Out of the eye of the tour, I saw their own lives difficult.
We know it, Carol.
"You cannot make them young
Carol, now the Fleischman ad-
ministrator, talking with an el- again. But society has to recog- So, put aside the controversies,
derly woman. The lady had a nize that old people count. They the Medicaid hassles and every-
tissue in her hand; she must have are not something that the rest thing else for one moment.
Happy Mother's Day, Carol.
been crying. Carol reached out, of society should have little use
From your community. ❑
talked to her in reassuring words, for. They don't look at what they

can't get Carol
osenberg out of
ixry mind.
Mother's Day
has made me think
of her even more.
When I came to
Detroit almost six
years ago, one of
the ongoing "front
page" stories that we were cover-
ing involved the problems of Bor-
man Hall and the Jewish Home
for Aged. It was a challenge that
involved money, politics, the pri-
orities we as Jews place on care
for our parents and grandparents,
and so many phases of human
emotion.
Visiting Borman Hall, it was
easy sometimes to
look beyond the
residents. They
were exercising in
the lobby or
watching televi-
sion or eating.
Whatever — the
meetings, the con-
ferences, the
questions, the dia-
logues between

DAVID GAD-HARF SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH NEWS

In recent days
and weeks, De-
troit's Jewish and
ft Arab-American
communities
have been under
a microscope of
local and nation-
al media atten-
tion. This time,
the reason was the fighting be-
tween Israel and Hezbollah, in-
stigated by the shelling of
northern Israel and resulting in
much destruction there and in
Lebanon.
I want to share some
thoughts about this latest up-
heaval in the Mideast, not about
the events per se, but rather
about how they have resonated
here in Detroit and specifical-
ly about the short-term and
long-term impact on local Jew-
ish-Arab relations.
In order to analyze the situ-
ation, it is necessary to put the
subject of local Arab-Jewish re-
lations into a historical context.
Until September 1993, our com-
munal connections to the Arab-
American community were
limited and shallow. It is true
that where Jews and Arab
Americans lived as neighbors
or worked as colleagues, people
were cordial to one another. It
is also true that Detroit is for-
tunate to feature one of the
longest-running groups foster-
ing Arab-Jewish relations, the
American Arabic and Jewish
Friends.
However, people avoided dis-
cussing the Middle East because
of the ongoing conflict there and
the inflamed passions that ac-
companied it. Discussions of the
Mideast conflict converted par-
ticipants into "us" and "them";
there was little hope that we
could find common ground and
reach understanding about each
other's perspectives.
After Israel itself decided to
negotiate peace with the Pales-
tinians and, as an initial step,
transferred control to them of
Jericho and the Gaza Strip, the
reverberations extended all the
way to Detroit and beyond. Lo-
cal Arab and Jewish organiza-
tions came together to celebrate
the peace accords. Community
leaders who previously knew
each other only by reading or
viewing interviews in the news
media were able to sit down and
honestly share their hopes for
peace in the Mideast.
We discovered that we did,
indeed, share a common goal,
that of a true peace that would
safeguard our brethren and en-

11,1
140,1.

David Gad-Hart is executive
director of the Jewish
Community Council.

able them to pursue their lives
without fear of terror or war. We
also recognized that the United
States could play a pivotal role
in nurturing peace; and that we,
as American citizens who have
a special stake in what happens
in the Mideast, were obligated
to encourage our nation to play
this role.
Many steps have been taken
in the 2 1/2 years that have
transpired since September
1993. For every encouraging
step forward — the peace agree-
ment with Jordan, the with-
drawal of the Israeli army from
many West Bank cities — there
has been at least one step back-
ward; witness the recent suicide
bombings in Israel. Neverthe-
less, even in the difficult times
— perhaps, especially in the dif-
ficult times — local ties between
the Arab and Jewish commu-
nities continued to grow.
However, the latest upheaval
in the region created a schism
between our communities that
will take much time to bridge.
One of the largest — if not the
largest — segments of the local
Arab-American community con-
sists of people who immigrated
from Lebanon or are descended
from Lebanese immigrants.
They have close ties to family
and friends still living there, just
as many of us have personal at-
tachments in Israel.
The anger directed at Israel,
and by extension, at the local
Jewish community for support-
ing the Israeli response to the
Hezbollah shelling of northern
Israel, was deeper than anything
I have experienced during my
eight years in Detroit. The news
media reinforced the anger by
dramatically presenting the civil-
ian bloodshed and its impact on
the local community.
It will take weeks, perhaps
months or longer to return to
the point where our two com-
munities were a few months
ago. As long as Mideast peace
is something both communities
pray for and strive for, we will
find a way to bridge the gap.
On a positive note, somehow
despite everything, the peace
process seems to have developed
a life of its own. The Palestin-
ian National Council voted over-
whelmingly_ to remove the
provisions of its charter calling
for Israel's destruction. A cease-
fire took hold on Israel's north-
ern border, hopefully setting the
stage for further negotiations
for peace with Lebanon and
Syria.
Let us all hope that this trend
continues, and that there will
be no further serious interrup-
tions in the movement toward
Mideast peace.

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