r We Cater To Your Every Desire. For the Erdsteins — longtime members of Temple Emanu-El and active Reform Jews — the wed- ding, to say nothing of the pre- liminaries, provided a firsthand look at an altogether new face of Judaism. Bride and groom were not al- lowed to see each other for seven days before the wedding. They had to fast for 24 hours before tak- ing their vows. Brian and Karene both dressed in white silk on the day of their marriage. Rabbi Leonardo Bitran of the Shaarey Zedek B'nai Israel Cen- ter in West Bloomfield explains that such rituals are similar to those undertaken in preparation for death. "But not in a morbid sense," he says. "(The traditions) make you aware that the wedding is important You want to enter into a covenant as pure as you can be." On March 15, Rabbi Bitran will conduct the marriage ceremony of Joel Rosenfeld and Amy Garon. In this case, it is the groom who wants to honor his Sephardic roots. "I think the (people in atten- dance) will find it fascinating, be- cause it's so uncommon. It should be a beautiful ceremony," Mr. Rosenfeld says. While taking their vows, Joel and Amy will stand under a chup- pah. That's nothing out of the or- dinary, but, as a less common element, parents of the couple will hold a tallis from Israel over their heads. The significance of the custom — which is common among Sephardim, but not exclusively Sephardic — lies in the fact that some Jewish men don't wear a tallis before marriage. Rabbi Blinn says that standing below a tails during the wedding ceremony is symbolic of mitzvot the man will perform during hismarried life. Mr. Rosenfeld also wanted the wedding ceremony to include the Shehechiyanu, the prayer thank- ing God for allowing one to reach a joyous occasion. Ashkenazic weddings do not include the recitation; neither do some Sephardic ceremonies. Rabbi Marc Angel of Congre- gation Shearith Israel in New York has written books on the va- riety of customs within Sephardic tradition. Many developed in far- flung communities and were in- fluenced by nearby gentile localities. "There's not one thing called Sephardic — just as there's not one thing called Ashkenazic," Rab- bi Angel says. For instance, weddings at Shearith Israel (known as the Spanish and Portuguese Synagogue of New York) do not include henna ceremonies. The engaged couple doesn't fast. The bridegroom doesn't wear a kittel (white robe), doesn't put ashes on his head and doesn't cir- cle his betrothed beneath the chuppah. The ketubah, Rabbi Angel says, is very simple and straightforward. Nonetheless, certain other cus- toms are performed without fail. "We've been doing weddings in our congregation a little over 340 years," Rabbi Angel says. "If people want to get married with us, they get married our way." Whatever the differences, most Jews would agree that the messages underlying all Sephardic — and Ashkenazic — weddings are the same. Marriage is a covenant between more than two people. "The Jewish wedding ceremo- ny sees the couple as part of a vast tradition." Rabbi Angel says. "The bride and the groom have a rela- tionship with God, with messian- ic times and with the future of Judaism as a whole." ❑ Whether it's a bar or bat mitzvah, wedding, birthday or any dinwba we'll make it unforgettable at Doubletree. Every event gets the kind of attention that you won't find at any other hotel. Our profes- sional Catering Department will see to your every wish from customized menus to special decorative touches. Plus, out-of-town guests enjoy spacious two-room suites with first-class amenities and service. It's all in the elegant surroundings you deserve with the personal service you expect from a fine hotel. C i) DOUBLETREE GUEST SUITES" ,0001.00141111111111•1111Mb SOUTHFIELD Sweet Dreams 1- 8 0 0 - 2 2 2 -TREE 28100 Franklin Road, Southfield, MI 810-350-2000 Doubletree Hotels and Doubletree Guest Suites welcome you at over 100 locations from coast to coast. L I