And, for each one of these
"deep, intuitive" guys, there's a
smart, independent, good-look-
ing woman who, any smart, in-
dependent, good-looking woman
watching the film might think,
"is not having a bad hair day, so
why stay with the jerk?"
Home for the reunion in small-
town Massachusetts is Willie
Conway (Timothy Hutton), who
plays the piano-bar circuit in
New York City. He's grappling
with accepting a respectable sales
position and staying with his girl-
friend of seven years, a smart
and loving attorney played by
Annabeth Gish. Willie rates her
as a "good, solid 7 1/2 in face,
body and personality."
While staying with his crazed
dad and brother, Willie, 29, be-
comes obsessively infatuated
with the 13-year-old next-door

neighbor girl, Marty, named for has the ultimate stand-by-her
her dead grandfather Martin. man girlfriend, Sharon (Mira
Spunky, intellectual and poised, Sorvino). So while Sharon does
Natalie Portman is outstanding beyond-nice things for Tommy,
as Marty. Marty cites Shake- such as planning a surprise
speare sonnets and views her re- birthday party with her friends
lationship with Willie as a (Rosie O'Donnell in a hilarious
dyslexic Romeo and Juliet.
must-see performance), he's still
Next, is Paul Kirkwood sleeping with his ex-high school
(Michael Rapaport), who
fling, the married-with-
runs a snow-plowing busi-
child Darian. A switch
ness with high-school bud-
MOVIES
from her wholesome
dies Tommy "Birdman"
role in Sabrina, Lauren
Rowland (Matt Dillon) and Key Holly plays the seductress Dari-
(Max Perlich), his knit ski cap- an.
wearing sidekick. Unfortunate-
The only married guy in the
ly, instead of removing the snow, bunch, Michael "Moe" Morris
Paul plows it against his girl- (Noah Emmerich) is happily wed
friend's (Martha Plimpton) to his high-school sweetheart
garage door every time she sleeps (Anne Bobby) and has two kids.
with the 40-year-old butcher. In a brief Kodak moment, how-
Combining that obsession with ever, Moe spearheads a West
a supermodel fetish — he named Side Story Jets vs. Sharks ren-
his Saint Bernard "Elle Macpher- dition — with 30-year-old boys
son" — Paul brawling with 40-year-old men
offers us in- — minus the singing and danc-
sightful, grip- ing, thank God.
ping dialogue
The last beautiful girl in the
such as: "A movie is confident, witty and
beautiful girl played with much self-assurance
can make you by Uma Thurman. With an in-
feel good. The credible sense of willpower and
supermodels are cheerful disdain, Uma spurns off
bottled promise, all the guys' advances and puts
scenes for a bet- their current relationships into
ter day — perspective for them.
promise in
Beautiful Girls would be bet-
stiletto heels."
ter off titled Get A Grip Guys —
As Tommy, and some analysis.
Matt does he
"Jan, you're a vegetarian and he's a meat cutter. What kind
Qh...)
of life could you have with a man that smells like brisket?"
ever stop mum-
asks Michael Rapaport of Martha Plimpton in Beautiful Girls. bling? — Dillon,
—Julie Smith Yolles

—

'Two Bits'

Rated PG
Dan: Mr. Pacino, did you just
Dan: I'll be honest, Mr. Paci-
AA,
n imaginary conversation: say you play a sickly grandfa- no. I saw the movie and, OK,
Dan Zimmerman: It is ther?
there were some cute parts: The
my pleasure to present Mr.
Mr. Pacino: Yeah, you gotta cinematography was impressive
Pacino.
problem with that?
and your verbal interplay with
Mr. Pacino: OK, there's this
Dan: That's quite a change of Jeremy Barone was sometimes
new film called Two Bits, direct- pace from your roles in The God- touching and sometimes funny.
ed by James Foley and starring father, Scarface or even your re- But frankly, what audience is
Jeremy Barone, who, by the way, cent endeavor, Heat.
Two Bits trying to appeal to?
is a great kid — a real tough guy;
Mr. Pacino: What, are you say- Some parts of the film seem in-
Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio, ing rm getting soft? Look, I don't appropriate for children while,
who is absolutely gorgeous but play just any grandfather — I in large part, the film is a kids'
has a real tough side to her have to provide a considerable movie. Here's a final question:
which, incidentally, I like
amount of emotional Can we expect further films in
in a girl; and myself, Al
support for Gennaro. which you, Mr. Al Pacino, play a
MOVIES
Pacino. The film is set in
This kid has to go decrepit old man?
South Philly, a tough town,
through a lot of hell to
Mr. Pacino: I can't get any
during the Depression which, as raise a quarter: he almost gets kind of respect from you, can I?
we all know, was a tough time to seduced by a middle-aged woman (Mr. Pacino whistles and sever-
be alive. It centers around this while trying to clean out her fur- al large men enter the room.)
kid, Gennaro (Barone), who is liv- nace; he watches as another poor, Grab him, boys, and take him
ing with his mother (Mastranto- desperate woman robs a kindly outside. I'll show you a decrepit
nio) and grandpa (that's me) grocer; and worst of all, he dis- old man.
amidst the depravity and pover- covers the same woman who
Dan (from hospital room): I
ty of a penniless neighborhood. tried to seduce him hanging by guess when compared with two
All the kid wants to do is see a her neck from the rafters. If I broken kneecaps, Two Bits isn't
movie at the new movie theater, wasn't around, Gennaro would that bad. Oh, and take it from
La Paloma. But unfortunately, have gone nuts (Dan: just as me. Despite his latest perfor-
he can't raise the 25 cents, or two young kids who see this movie mance, Mr. Pacino is still a pret-
bits, that it costs. The thing is, I, might). And the fact that he has ty tough guy.
his sickly grandfather, have a to deal with my impending death
quarter that I promise will be his doesn't make things any easier
when I die ...
for the kid.
—Dan Zimmerman

'White Squall'

Crew members of the Albatross face the biggest challenge of their lives after a
White Squall sinks their ship.

idley Scott, director ofAlien, are beautifully composed: young
Blade Runner and Thelma men racing along the rim of
and Louise, is best-known Mount Soufriere, an active vol-
for creating tension-laden cano, or dashing beside the shore
films with an exemplary concern of a mirrored lake.
One wishes the camera would
for artistic detail. Is it any won-
der, then, that White Squall con- linger and allow the viewer to
tains exceptional scenes of the soak up these exotic locations.
ocean's majesty and its murder- Instead they are jump-cut like
some soda-pop commercial.
ousness?
These sequences, however,
This true story takes place in
are
just the set-up for the unex-
1960 when the upper crust had
the luxury of sending their re- pected Titanic storm, the "white
bellious teen-age boys to the squall," which capsizes the boat
Ocean Academy, on a seagoing and places everyone aboard in
peril. The scene is so spec-
vessel that sailed south
tacularly intense that I'm
of the equator and of-
MOVIES
surprised ushers at the
fered the boys academ-
theater weren't handing
ic as well as life lessons.
The film's narrative con- out life jackets and Dramamine
science is provided by Chuck to theatergoers.
The flaws in the film drown
Gieg (Scott Wolf of FOX-TV's
"Party of Five"), a Tom Cruise out its adventure, however.
sound-alike, who chooses to First, there are too many boys to
spend his last year of high school keep track of— they need to be
aboard the Ocean Academy's Al- assigned sailors' uniforms with
numbers on the back. Second, af-
batross.
On board, we have the bully, ter the disastrous freak squall,
who also happens to be a world- rescue, and return to land, there
class high diver. There's the self- is a sudden rush to judgment.
In a tribunal, Skipper's sail-
destructive boy, who struggles
against his overbearing father. ing acumen is questioned, and
There's the emotionally brittle whether or not dissension on the
boy whose brother has recently ship undermined his authority.
died. These boys with attitudes Without a time to properly
are about to learn about much grieve for their lost shipmates,
more than longitude and lati- the conclusion is unsatisfactory,
as parents and Navy officials
tude.
They meet their match with rush to measure accountability,
cantankerous "Skipper" Chris to place blame and responsibil-
Sheldon (Jeff Bridges), the one ity on someone rather than some
man qualified to teach the teens "thing."
(lik
about the sea and themselves.
Like many coming-of-age, rite-
—Dick Rockwell
of-passage films before it, White
Squall attempts to remind us
that we are "only as strong as
our weakest link."
Outstanding
During these young men's ad-
venturous expeditions, they are
Very Good
forced to become a cohesive unit
— a crew. Several times, when
Good
c%)
the young men are ashore, the
bonding that has occurred at sea
Fair
buoys them. Scott's shore scenes

R

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