No Place Like Israel CARL ALPERT SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH NEWS T 1560 S. WOODWARD • BIRMINGHAM, MI 48009 • (810) 642 9777 - ••■ GEO Finish US. Department of Transportaeon Hardwood Floor ALL HARDWOODS INSTALLATION, REFINISHING, STAINING Rip-outs, Carpet Removal, Repairs • Custom Bordes s with Inserts • Swedish GUTSA finish SPECIALISTS REFINISH WOOD FLOORS LIKE NEW Refinishing Packages Starting .70 cents per foot Responsible for the Resbration of TAM-O-SHANTER Country Club GEOfinish 313.881.2100 600 Vernier Rd Grosse Pointe, MI DRUNK DRIVING DOESN'T JUST KILL DRUNK DRIVERS. Nicholas Esposito. killed Oct. 1.3. 1989 at 8:25pin. T HE D ET RO I T J•E W Q: What investment offers `:.t..competitive rates `.--'-great tax advantages complete safety A: U.S. SAVINGS BONDS THE GREAT AMERICAN INVESTMENT 1-800-US-BONDS Next time your friend insists on driving drunk, do whatever it takes to stop him. Because if he kills innocent people, how will you live with yourself? FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS DRIVE DRUNK. he trivia of everyday life can sometimes be more re- vealing than all the head- lines about politics, economics and international re- lations. Look at Israel: A Minor Oversight For the past 30 years, the Histadrut la- bor federation has been the own- er of a large shopping center on the main street of Nahariyah, but did not know it until a local res- ident broke his leg in the build- ing and brought suit against the registered owner for negligent maintenance. Something to Cackle About At the beginning of the year, the Jewish population of Israel num- bered 4.43 million. As of the same date, it was revealed that there were no fewer than 7 million lay- ing hens in the country; roosters were not included. The Principal Versus the Girl Students The controversy erupted over the wearing of miniskirts. The girls objected to the principal's ruling. At the Dvir School of Hotel Personnel in Haifa, the director laid down a regulation that all girl students must appear at school in miniskirts — and the girls ob- jected. It Could Have Been Arafat A week after he returned home from Oslo with his Nobel prize medallion, Shimon Peres took it out of its container and inspect- ed it. To his consternation, he found the name of Yitzhak Rabin engraved on the reverse. He made a quick call to Mr. Rabin, who had not yet inspected his medal; and they established that the two medals had apparently been switched during the Oslo ceremony. They made the ex- change at home. Rape Is Rape Haifa police re- sponded promptly to a complaint drape from a local woman. They asked for details and the woman tearfully reported that her dog had been raped by the male ca- nine belonging to a neighbor. He Got the Wrong Picture When a group of Jewish settlers mistakenly entered an Arab vil- lage near Nablus, they were fired upon. An Israeli cameraman, em- ployed by an American news agency, dropped his camera, rushed to rescue two little girls who had been wounded and took them to the hospital. The follow- ing day he was fired by his em- ployer for not getting the hot news picture. There's a Limit Immediate- ly following a major terrorist at- tack on Israelis, the police ceived a call from an excited cit- izen who threatened he would kill every Arab he met. The police- man on duty tried to calm him down, but when the caller con- tinued hysterically that he was beside himself and was prepared to beat up his wife, a patrol car made a quick visit to his house; and he was taken away for psy- chiatric observation. Statistical Proof About a third of Israelis are smokers, and two-thirds are non-smokers. That means, of course, that in the country's death statistics one- third are smokers and two-thirds Israeli life in the news. are non-smokers. This proves, ac- cording to Yosef Lapid, that non- smoking is twice as dangerous as smoking. By Natural Means An ob- servant woman underwent fer- tility treatments for years, to no avail. She suspended all treat- ment and then, over a year later, at age 42, she gave birth to a healthy baby boy. Her husband explained it was by "natural means," that is, he intensified his saying of prayers and doing good deeds. El Oil Spill Sources Found DANIELLA ASHKENAZY SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH NEWS I wo students at an Israeli technological high school, operated under the aus- pices of Tel Aviv Universi- ty's Joseph and Rebecca Mayerhoff Technical College, have written a computer program that may help environmental agencies pin down the source of marine oil spills. The program is designed to au- tomatically compare the struc- ture and quality of hydrocarbons which form a unique molecular "fingerprint" in ships. The Israel Institute of Petroleum and En- ergy plans to test the reliability of the program in actual marine spills over the next year. The idea of such a computer program — a project carried out by high school students Adi Hecht and Tal Dekel — was sug- gested by Dr. Yosefa Ben-Asher, head of the chemistry lab at the Israel Institute of Petroleum and