p 4- T The Workmen'sCircle/Arbeter Ring ENJOY A SECULAR/CULTURAL JEWISH LIFESTYLE.., 1900-1995 7 and under * Crying that is unusual for the context. * A change in sleep habits — nightmares, fear of going to sleep, waking up fearful in the middle of the night— or eating habits. * Aches and pains upon awak- ening in the morning where a physical cause has been ruled out. * Headaches and stomachaches, often in conjunction with a fear of going to school. * Changes in toileting, such as wetting the pants over the age of 5, or other regression, such as thumb-sucking. * Expressed fears to the parent or someone else indicating in- creased worries and uncertain- ties. * Physical symptoms such as eye twitches or wringing of hands. * Trouble separating from par- ents. All children will experience stress and some will have ad- justment difficulties, says Dr. Stettner, but symptoms like these which last more than a couple of months warrant intervention. Dr. London asks parents if they see problems in two of the three spheres of a young child's life: peer relationships, school and home. "If the child has problems in more than one sphere which are not transitory over time, the parents probably need help in getting their child through what is a developmental crisis. "After talking with the par- ents, a professional can tell a lot from an initial evaluation with the child. In some cases, I might tell the parents to watch things for a couple months before initi- ating therapy," he says. Ages 8-12 * Episodes of lying and theft which may be attention seeking. * Withdrawal from parents and friends. * Change and difficulty in social relationships. * May have more intense out- bursts and temper tantrums, in- cluding destructiveness toward objects. * More crying than normal. * Change in eating habits, espe- cially overeating or undereating. * Overlap with younger children in terms of nightmares, aches and pains, twitches and other physical symptoms. "If these symptoms persist for more than a couple of months, we're dealing with more than just an adjustment problem," says Dr. Stettner. "We see lots of adjustment problems in September with the start of school. It's a critical time for kids to experience anxiety." "When behavior interferes with learning or social growth, it's time for intervention," says Dr. Jeffrey Last, a clinical psy- chologist specializing in children and adolescents who practices in Southfield and Sterling Heights. The other part of the equation in borderline cases, he says, is how much parents are able to tol- erate. The need for therapy in these instances is not determined so much by what the child is do- ing, he says, but by the family's reaction. A negative reaction to a child's behavior may reinforce that behavior, which in turn cre- ates more problems for the child and the family itself In addition to the start of school, other common anxiety triggers include the birth of a sib- ling, the death of a loved one and divorce and/or remarriage, says Dr. Stettner. "With these kinds of situations, it is often helpful to take a proactive stance." 13 and above * Changes in social-emotional re- lationships, including withdraw- al from parents or peer group. * Change in eating habits in- cluding overeating, undereating, bingeing and purging. * Change in sleep patterns in- cluding sleeping too much or too little and waking in the middle of the night or very early in the morning. * Experimentation with drugs, often involving secrecy (whis- pered phone calls); lying; steal- ing (including stealing from parents); excessive use of gums, mints, eyedrops and sunglasses. * Association with friends par- ents have never heard of and nev- er get to meet. * Moving to a more deviant, act- ing-out peer group which is not academically motivated. * Frequent skipping of school; de-. fiant behavior at school. * Interest in cults. * Voiced worries about accep- tance, feelings of rejection, com- ments about death and dying like "Nobody loves me," "Life isn't worth living." Risk-taking behaviors — drinking, drugs — always need to be examined, says Dr. London, although all children exhibiting them may not need therapy. "These teens need education, if not counseling." With teens, he continues, if there is a significant problem at school, in the home or with peers, the child should be followed to determine if the situ- ation is persisting. If it is, inter- vention is appropriate. Stresses in adoptive families often are manifested in the ear- ly teen years, Dr. London adds. "Identity issues are so crucial at this age," he says, "and the adop- tive family is often tested." Depression Depression runs in families. "A child with a depressed parent is more likely to be depressed," says Dr. London. And while in adults the chemical system of the brain is often the culprit, the causes of depression are not as clear-cut in THERAPY page 8 EARLY CHILDHOOD PROGRAM *Dynamic Developmental Curriculum *Half/Full Days *Optional Lunch *Enrichment for Observ ances Yiddish Classe Kindergarteners viovi-aa- Y s SUNDAY SCHOOL T een G o ' ? Enriched with dance, cooking, crafts, games, drama. 1- 10 -r once pi '4Aetel Y, Individualized Bar/Bas Mitzvah 0 4 CI RCLE 26341 Coolidge Oak Park, MI 48237 810-545-0985 The Workmen's Circle/Arbeter Ring fosters Jewish identity and participation in Jewish life among its members through Jewish, .especially Yiddish, culture and education, friendship, mutual aid and the pursuit of social and economic justice. Top 10 Reasons To Get In Gear With the Soteier at afterz9ateefro Vea /leftist o_ - (1 Membership, 2 years for the price of 1 plus $100 (new members only). — Rabbi Herbert Yoskowitz, Cantor Max Shimansky and Reverend Joseph Baras. co] Religious School with 2 locations: Southfield & , West Bloomfield/Walled Lake. cl Youth Programs. L§1 Bagel Beat for Teens. ca Sisterhood, Men's Club, Young at Heart and Chavuras. 01 Shabbat Dinners and Sit Down Kiddushes L Outreach Programs for New Americans. Lunch and Learn, and Book Bites. Di Rabbi Herbert Yoskowitz BEHIND THE WHEEL revving up your Spirit! 'et ,lexefot (centrally Located) 21100 West Twelve Mile Rd. Southfield • (810) 352-8670 0") C I- A Perfect Family Gift... A Subscription to the Jewish News. 810-354-6620 U) CD F7