Under New Ownership!
We are a Full-Service Salon

Forget The Empty Nest:
They're Back

OFFERING GREAT LOOKS FOR BACK TO SCHOOL!
WE OFFER:
Haircuts & Snrling
Manicures/P icures
Make-up Application
Much More!

•

RUTH LITTMANN STAFF WRITER

T

Open Monday through Saturday • Walk-ins Welcome
Located in the back of The Franklin Racquet Club
810-352-4884

• • • • • • • • • • • • •
• • •• ••••i••
'

• • • • • • IN Ill •

SEE SPOT RUN

a

stamping suckering emporium

•

•
o
s
si • • al • • • • • • • • • •
• • • m.

stamping classes 1$1 sticker parties

32716 Franklin Rd. Franklin, MI
(810) 932-7768

•
• io
m

••

Our New Location
Is A Work Of Art

Thing-A-Majigs Is Now At 32751 Franklin Road.

We are now a full service art studio for children. We
still do Birthday Parties for ages 6 years and up. We also offer
a large selection of art classes hopefully to fit your schedule.

We will be starting classes the week of September 12th,
sessions run every 4 weeks. Classes will be no larger than
eight children, so reserve your child's space as soon as possible.

Mtvg-8-Nto

32751 Franklin Road, Franklin, MI

(810) 851-3805

is 5:66 OFF

I

ANY
]'-SHIRT or
NOVELTY TIES

I

1

f32

w/coupon•• expices 9/15/95

•10

111N1

Nal

West Bloomfield
7 -0330

Knollwood Plaza
7414 Haggerty Rd.
(at 14 Mile Rd.)

125% OFF-1

EASY
FR
BO ALL 1
PICK-UP .. .
GIVE US A
I
RING-A-LING ON I
I THE DING A LING!! I

-

IlaiN 111111

Livonia
261-5740

17134 Farmington Rd.
(at 6 Mile Rd.)

Hours: Mon.-Sat. 10-9, Sun. 12-5

-

L

ALL
PODS and
ACCESSORIES

Royal Oak

288-4440

I
I

Waterford

Northwood Shopping Ctr.
3339 N. Woodward Ave.
(at 13 Mile Rd.)

1.22n

Highlander Square
4189 Highland Rd.
1E. of Pontiac Lk. Rd.)

VISA

hey were split over suds
and the Whirlpool. "I wash
everything by hand, but
my mom insists on the
dishwasher," says Cheryl Chud-
now of Farmington Hills.
Sometimes petty. Sometimes
harsh. Conflicts almost invari-
ably arise when adult children
move back home with their par-
ents. The laundry list of sticking
points: boyfriends, girlfriends, the
phone, the car and chores.
For many a reluctant young re-
turnee, this "post-
graduate" experience
issues flashbacks to
high school. Sudden-
ly beholden to fami-
ly members, they
often feel deprived of
independence.
For parents — for-
ever parental — the
need to know exact-
ly where their chil-
dren are during the
wee hours of the
morning and when,
exactly when, the
lawn will be mowed
lingers as more a
matter of habit than
penchant for control.
For Ms. Chudnow,
23, the hand vs. ma-
chine dishwashing
debate presents mi-
nor disruptions to
the peace. Overall,
living with her folks
after 2 1/2 years
away has been a
highly positive expe-
rience — but not one
without stipulations.
"I like being at
home with my fami-
ly," she says. "The
only ground rule is if
I'm not going to be home by 2
a.m., I have to call."
Lorraine Lerner, a clinical so-
cial worker with Jewish Family
Service, stresses the importance
of communicating mutual expec-
tations. Parents should make de-
sires clear to their children and
vice versa.
"I heard one young man say
his parents became distressed
when he came home late," she re-
calls. "And when the parents
stayed out late, the son worried
in turn. He told them, 'You have
to understand that it goes both
ways.' "
Expectations of college gradu-
ates have changed in recent
decades. Thirty years ago, 20-
somethings commonly finished
school, married and struck out on
their own. But the 1990s gradu-

ate confronts a more complicat-
ed post-college scene. Jobs are
tougher to find. Rents are cost-
lier.
More and more these days,
young people are moving in with
their parents after college grad-
uation. They say it's not embar-
rassing or an indication that they
can't make it on their own. It just
makes sense, and several young
adults wouldn't opt for anything
else.
"If you have a good relation-

move home until I got estab-
lished."
Mr. Dwoskin's working at it.
Employed as an account execu-
tive with an on-line marketing
company, he works a lot but nev-
ertheless finds time to eat dinner
with his parents almost every
night and keep his family updat-
ed on the latest.
"I'm honest with them. They're
honest with me. They know my
life story. When I go out at night,
I tell them where I'm going. They
understand," he says.
In a certain sense,
this contemporary
homecoming phe-
nomenon has given
rise to an all-but-ex-
tinct extended family.
Ms. Chudnow's
mother, Ann, has no
problem with Cheryl's
return.
"She's a help
around the house. I
like having her back.
She has her freedom.
My husband and I
have ours," Mrs.
Chudnow says. "Sure,
someday I'd like her
to move out. I'd like to
have the privacy. But
for now, I don't mind."
Ms. Lerner at JFS
says there's a time
when parents ought
to encourage their
children's second exo-
dus. Too much de-
pendency for too long
isn't necessarily
healthy.
"The danger is
when the child has a
habit of not keeping
jobs and going from
PHOTO BY GLENN TRIEST
one job to the next.
Cheryl Chudnow with her parents,
There can be no long-term plan
Herman and Ann.
when this occurs," she says.
Another potentially grave sit-
ship with your parents and you're uation: when an adult child earns
not invading anyone's privacy, enough money, but doesn't want
then it's silly to waste your mon- to spend it on rent and other ex-
ey on rent," says 25-year-old Re- penses that serve to cut the emo-
nee Himelhoch.
tional umbilical cord.
Ms. Himelhoch lives in the
Eventually, if parents feel the
basement of her parent's home in need to force their child out, it
Southfield. Earnings (from a job helps to offer encouragement, not
at the Jewish Federation) help criticism.
her pay for car insurance, a pri-
"The parents have to be sup-
vate phone line and entertain- portive and hopeful and convey
ment.
this to their child. They need to
Like Ms. Himelhoch, Jon make their son or daughter un-
Dwoskin, another recent college derstand that things will work
grad, doesn't pay rent to live with out — that they want their child
his parents.
to be independent in the same
"It's always been an open-door way that the child wants inde-
home," he says. "There was nev- pendence for himself," Ms. Lern-
er any doubt in my mind that er says.
when I was done with school, I'd
Social workers advise parents