Community Views
Editor's Notebook
A Lesson Learned
From A Friend
Stop Complaining
Or Make Your Move
RABBI DAVID NELSON SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH NEWS
Writing a commu-
nity views column
is a challenge for
someone who is ac-
customed to a re-
sponsive congre-
gation or even an
occasional "nap-
per" who is, never-
theless, a live (if
slightly relaxed) body. Yet this
column, hopefully, will offer some
insight and provide a modicum
of wisdom.
Jacob was my friend — my
wise friend, I should add. He al-
ways managed to have a story or
an understanding that had some-
how escaped my youthful per-
spective. It was in Rio de Janeiro,
Brazil, my first pulpit as a rabbi,
that friendship and respect for
Jacob grew.
Having lived in four countries,
Jacob had a great facility with
languages and insight into cul-
tures that only comes with expe-
rience. Yet, as a man of the world,
he stood firmly rooted in his own
tradition and pointed with pride
to his family roots in Lisbon, Por-
tugal. I often said to others, when
I would describe Jacob and the
impact that his friendship had on
David Nelson is rabbi at
Congregation Beth Shalom.
me, that he was truly a Reader's
Digest most memorable charac-
ter.
One of my favorite stories
about Jacob involves an outing
that we took to the mountains
surrounding Rio — mountains
that lie about an hour's drive
from the city. Native Brazilians
escape the intense summer (in
December and January) by going
to the mountains, and so we
joined the trek to Teresopolis. We
had packed up a lunch and set off
to stay overnight; as we drove
along, we noticed a car strand-
ed by the side of the road.
Now, a slight detour from the
course of the story is required so
that I may explain that there was
no equivalent in Brazil to our Au-
tomobile Club of Michigan. There
was no emergency road service
number to call. There wasn't even
a highway department from
which one could request assis-
tance. The only source you could
rely on was the goodwill of an-
other motorist who might drive
on and send someone back to
help from the next station, which
could be miles away. That's what
had happened about an hour or
two before we arrived.
Jacob slowed when he recog-
nized the stranded motorist.
Stopping, we went to chat and
ELIZABETH APPLEBAUM ASSOCIATE EDITOR
see if we could help. What we en-
countered was a slightly agitat-
ed, overwrought man who was
convinced that he would be stuck
there on the dirt roadside for the
remainder of the weekend. Jacob
assured him that we would keep
him company; he shouldn't wor-
ry. "Calmar is the Brazilian
watchword. So we waited, joking,
talking and thinking about this
request for roadside aid which
seemed as if it would never ma-
terialize.
Finally, after more than an
hour the sun began to set; a re-
pair truck appeared in the dis-
tance. Jacob's friend again
became nervous. "I don't know
what to pay him! What do you
think I should give?"
"Give half of whatever you
were prepared to pay when you
were sure he would never come,
and I'm sure he'll be satisfied,"
Jacob replied.
Think of it, my friend. Half of
what we promise in that moment
when we despair and assume no
one will rescue us. The words are
wise and stay with me often as
I remember my friend.
Whether it is man or God who
we wish to repay, half of what we
were offering will most likely be
a satisfactory gift and expression
of our gratitude. ❑
It seems every handedly bring the Israeli gov-
time I turn ernment down."
around some-
What chutzpah! Imagine if
body is we heard that a Knesset mem-
mouthing off — ber was sick and tired of the
obsessively — Clinton administration and
about the way would do all he could to see its
Israel should downfall. I don't know about
run its affairs.
you, but I would let him know
"Israel must that hey, pal, I live in the Unit-
not make peace with the Pales- ed States, not you, and that this
tinians!"
country, not Israel, elected the
"Israel has to get those set- man.
tlers out of all the territories!"
Why is it that we Jews feel
"Israel can never negotiate compelled to constantly, and so
with Syria!"
vocally, tell Israel how it should
"Israel should make behave?
Jerusalem an international
Do we see Italian-Americans
city!"
taking out full-page ads in
I have some news for you.
newspapers nationwide, de-
Israel is an independent na- manding that the pope re-
tion with a democratically elect- nounce his position on abortion
ed government. It makes its and make it legal throughout
own decisions. It makes its own Italy?
policy. It should be allowed to
Of course not.
run its own affairs.
Do we hear British emi-
I'm not talking about those grants threatening to bring
who have any criticism of Is- down the Major administration
rael; there's no question there if the prime minister talks with
are negatives in Israel that the Irish Republican Army?
need to be brought to the fore-
What a ridiculous thought.
front. Legitimate criticism of Is-
I am a Zionist. I support the
rael is completely valid, and State of Israel and I support the
often necessary and helpful.
government of Israel. I think its
My complaint is with those decisions are sometimes ridicu-
who never stop talking about lous or worse, dangerous, but un-
exactly how Israel should be- less I'm willing to live with the
have and conduct every aspect repercussions, I watch what I say.
of its business.
It's vital that people care so
This curious ailment has no tremendously about Israel. It's
end of afflicted. They're always vital that input from American
deriding Israel and demanding Jewry continue.
it stop this or that and they go
But please, Israel is not a
on and on and on and on. They child we need constantly to dis-
hold rallies to denounce Israel's cipline and critique.
treatment of the Palestinians,
If a positive Diaspora-Israel
or they have speakers who relationship is to continue, it
scream that Yitzhak Rabin is a should start with our recogni-
traitor. They label anyone who tion that we must accept Israel
doesn't agree with them "ma- as an independent nation with
niacs out to destroy Israel."
all the flaws that every inde-
Then there's the case of a cer- pendent nation has. And if
tain so-called Jewish commu- we're so obsessed with some-
nal leader from the Northeast. thing "wrong" that Israel is do-
He spent much of his time sev- ing — if we're losing sleep over
eral years ago ranting about the way Israel is handling the
how much he loathed the Be- settlers or not handling the set-
gin administration and all its tlers, or negotiating with the
policies, finally asserting that PLO or not negotiating with the
he himself was going to do PLO — there's a one-word so-
everything he could to "single- lution. Aliyah. ❑