Reggie handed me back my card and
stepped aside.
I offered my arm to Gwen Poulstice,
and we entered the enclosure.
"Well, Gwen," I said. "Here we are."
She grimaced again and removed her
hand from my arm. "Yes," she muttered.
"What do we do now?" I asked.
"We wait for the carriages to arrive,"
she replied.
So there we were, standing in a large,
enclosed area, among other similarly
stice on one side and Princess Margaret She kept it there several seconds longer
on the other side.
than necessary.
"Hi," I said to the Queen's baby sister.
Then she looked down first at Wills
"Hello there. I don't suppose you have and then at Harry and said, "This is
a cigarette."
Leonard Schecter." The two of them gave
"I'm sorry, no."
me perfectly condescending little nods,
"Well, I've quit, but every now and as if I were a footman. Di gave them
then I have this extraordinary urge."
each a correctional nudge, and they mut-
"Is one permitted to smoke around the tered dutifully, in unison, "How do you
Queen?"
do?"
"Oh, I just ignore her. If she expects
"Fine, thanks. And you know Gwen
us to put up with the corgis then she Poulstice, of course."
ought to be able to put up with a little
"Yes, of course," said Di, offering her
smoke, don't you think?"
hand, which Gwen Poulstice shook rev-
"Di and Charles
When we arrived at the paddock, I erentially.
lost sight of Di. I stared at the horses
"A pleasure to see you again, ma'am."
walked as if any
without interest. They all looked the
"Indeed," said Di. "Well, you'll have
incidental contact
same to me, nasty brutes with attitudes. to join us in the Royal Box for tea after
The line began to double back upon the race."
between them would be
itself to return to the Royal Enclosure.
"We'd love to," I said quickly.
catastrophic."
We moved back to make room for the
Gwen stood there, mouth slightly
Queen and Philip. Suddenly there was agape, as Di and the boys continued
From Di and I.
Di walking directly toward me, holding back toward the enclosure.
a prince in each hand. My breath caught.
"Gwen," I said after they were gone,
dressed people, with absolutely nothing She stopped directly in front of me and "you feel like having a cup with Liz and
to do. We stood there in stony silence un- smiled. "How nice to see you, Leonard." Phil?" ❑
til cries were heard from the grandstand.
I took her proffered hand. "Likewise,
From the book, DI and I, by Peter Lef-
The occupants of the Royal Enclosure Your Royal Highness..."
court. Copyright © 1994. Reprinted with
moved forward to get a better view of
Her hand was soft and pliant in mine. permission of Random House, Inc.
the track as the first of the royal car-
riages came into view. Sitting beneath
an enormous pink bonnet was the
Queen Mother, still going strong at 93.
Beside her was the balding and sexu-
n Peter Lefcourfs fandful new nov- can't quite forgive me because there's
ally challenged Prince Edward in a
el, Di and I, a scandal erupts when sex in the novel."
morning coat and top hat.
The 52-year-old TV writer and Emrny
Princess Diana runs off with a mid-
Then came Princess Margaret, rid-
dle-aged American TV writer. Now award-winning producer ("Cagney &
ing with her son.
Lacey") who has two other
the very idea is causing a
Then there was a small, dramatic gap
novels to his credit, adds, "I
scandal.
in the procession, and a collective out-
keep responding to them
" ' My Affair with Diana'
pouring of breath as the carriage with
that
if s not torrid or tacky
Book
Row"
screamed
a
Charles, Di, and the little princes came
sex."
recent
front-page
headline
into view. My heart ached as I watched
The fictional Diana set-
her sitting there beside the man she de- of London's Sunday Ex-
tles down in Rancho Cuca-
spised.
press. "Fury at 'Sex With
Di and Charles walked as if any in- Diana' Novel" chimed The
monga, Calif reigning over
cidental contact between them would Mail On Sunday. Both
a McDonald's franchise with
be catastrophic. Wills and Harry trot- tabloids quoted Princess
her lover. "I hope it won't be
ted along in front of them in their down- Diana's stepgrandmother,
seen as a gimmick," says
sized morning suits and miniature
Lefcourt. "If s really Cin-
romance novelist Barbara
Dickensian top hats.
derella in reverse. The
Gartland, who called for Peter Lelcourt: All wgaIdbe
The procession entered the Royal En-
premise is that one would
closure. A few minutes later there was the book to be burned. Nei- forgiven if Di would read the book.
rather be in love and work
a gradual movement toward the rear of ther paper reported, how-
in
a
McDonald's
in Cucamonga than not
ever,
that
Di
and
I
is
a
comic
novel.
the enclosure.
be
in
love
in
Kensington
Palace."
That
it's
Princess
Diana
—
who
takes
"Where's everyone going?"
Mr.
Lefcourt,
who
conceived
of Di and
"To the paddock. To look at the hors- up with shlumpy Leonard Schecter — is
/
while
writing
the
1992
TV
movie,
'The
es."
patently fictional. And that the book sati-
"Are we all supposed to go?"
rizes not just the royal faMily, but Fleet Women of Windsor," still fantasizes about
"Yes."
having tea with the princess. He believes
Street as well
The Queen kept stopping to allow her
all
would be forgiven if she would just read
"The thing with the Brits is, they can
mother to catch her breath. And we, in make fun of themselves, but you can't the novel.
turn, had to start and stop according-
"She'll realize it's a very sweet story,"
make fun of them," says a mildly unnerved
ly. It was a strange, jerky procession.
Lefcourt, who was not looking forward to he says.
Di and the boys were up toward the
— Matthew Flamm
front. I found myself with Gwen Poul- his present London book tour. 'They also
I
RE PRINTED WITH PERMI SSI ON FROM ENTERTAINME N1 WEEKL
"Not even for...the Royal Enclosure?"
"Is this another one of your jokes?"
"Nope. I have a pass to the Royal En-
closure given to me personally by the
Princess of Wales. We had tea yester-
day in the Fulham Road. We got on the
subject of Ascot and she said, 'Oh, do
please come, Leonard. It will be so fright-
fully boring without you.' So what do you
say?"
There was a long, agonized silence.
Then, in a small voice, she said, "L. sup-
pose I could make myself free."
"Splendid."
We drove out to Windsor Great Park
on Saturday in a Mercedes 190 that I
had rented for the day. I could tell from
the way Gwen's nose twitched when I
opened the door for her that the car was
below the appropriate level for Ascot. It
was not unlike the look she had given
my morning suit when she had greeted
me in her parlor.
The suit was broad in the shoulders
and tight in the waist. You could tell
it had been borrowed from someone
a little better put together than I
was.
Security was tight at the entrance to
the Royal Enclosure. I handed my card
to one of the dark suits. He examined it
carefully.
"Your name, sir?"
"Leonard Schecter."
He shook his head slowly. "Sorry, Mr.
Spector, but I don't seem to have you on
the list."
"That's Schecter — Sir Leonard
Schecter and Lady Schecter," I said. "We
were invited personally by the Princess
of Wales."
"I'm afraid, sir, that we'll have to wait
for corroboration from the Princess her-
self You do understand, don't you?"
"No, I don't understand. We drove all
the way out here from London. Do you
think it's fun wearing a morning suit in
this heat?"
"If you'll wait outside until after the
carriages arrive..."
Suddenly I heard a familiar voice from
behind me.
"Leonard?" I turned and saw Rupert
among the reporters on a balcony above
the entrance. It took him only a few sec-
onds to grasp the situation.
"Let him in, Reggie," he said to the
suit at the door. "He's a close friend of
the Princess."
Having followed Di around for years,
Rupert was on a first-name basis with
the members of the Royal Protection
Squad.
"She'll be very cross if she finds out
you made him stand outside," Rupert
boomed.
CO
43