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So Much More Than Fun And Games
BBYO members discuss the tough issue of family violence.
S IEPHANIE APPEL, SOUTHFIELD HIGH SCHOOL
n Oct. 29, more
than 170 Jewish
teen-agers piled into
four buses en route to Camp
Maas in Ortonville.
It was time for "Fall Con-
clave," a fabulous weekend of
B'nai B'rith youth group activi-
ties. Picture this: bunks, trees,
a puppet show, a dance, a bon-
fire and family violence.
Yes, family violence. Al-
though the majority of the week-
end was dedicated to fun and
games, a more serious side sur-
faced. On Saturday afternoon,
several members of B'nai B'rith
Youth Organization (BBYO), as
well as two professional guest
speakers, addressed the issue of
family violence.
The purpose of the program
was to try to stop a problem that
often goes unnoticed or ignored.
Teen-agers do not talk about
abuse. Therefore, it's up to pro-
grams like this one to bring the
issue to the fore.
For six weeks, BBYO mem-
bers Jessica Feldman, Ronit
Folk, Aaron Lazarus, Matt Cit-
rin, Stephanie Lovinger, Eva
Soltan and Cary Rosen worked
together to present the topic in
a realistic manner.
The group performed two
skits. In the first skit, a teen-age
girl returns from a date only to
be pulled inside of the house by
her enraged father.
Friends see her the next day
with a black eye. When they in-
quire about the black eye, the girl
responds, "I bumped into some-
thing," or "It was an accident."
In the other skit, a father goes
ballistic after his daughter for-
gets to bring in the mail. He ver-
bally abuses her.
The audience of youth
groupers was quiet during the
skits, which generated positive
comments later that day.
"I think the (actors) portrayed
their roles well. They stayed se-
rious. Now I'm more aware of
what to do if I know someone
with these problems," one youth
group member said.
P'ninah Stein, staff adviser
for the program, said she also
thought the forum was effective.
"Help Cards" with emergency
numbers were passed out to
BBYO members. Ms. Stein not-
ed that the youth groupers held
onto them.
Youth group members also
received written information
about family violence. The in-
Stephanie Appel
formation sheets discussed char-
acteristics of children living in
abusive homes, the cycle of vi-
olence, effects of abuse over
time, as well as ways to help an
abused individual.
Mary Beth Cannady from
HAVEN (Help Against Violent
Encounters Now) and Lucille
Gerstein from B'nai B'rith
Women spoke to the group.
Although Fall Conclave was
filled with entertaining social
activities, the forum on family
violence proved that BBYO is a
lot more than fun and games.
Inter-Faith Dating: Across Generations
What do Jewish teen-agers think about dating people of different religions?
MELISSA BRONSTEIN, SOUTHFIELD-LATHRUP HIGH SCHOOL
ri met Christina
when he was just 12
years old.
In his mind, she was beauti-
ful. She always knew just what
to say and what to do. Ari
thought Christina was perfect.
Five years later, his interest
in her has grown. Now, they
date frequently. There is just
one problem. Christina is what
his parents call a shikse non-
Jewish girl.
Neither set of parents ap-
proves of the relationship, but
Ari and Christina secretly con-
tinue to date. The couple knows
they cannot hide the truth for-
ever.
Although Ari and Christina
are fictitious characters, situa-
tions like theirs arise often.
-
Melissa Bronstein
Should parents forbid their chil-
dren from dating outside the
faith? Is interfaith dating im-
moral? These questions have
been argued for generations
among not only Jews, but also
members of other communities.
Some people argue that dat-
ing, especially in high school,
should be for f u n, and not nec-
essarily for finding a spouse.
Others disagree. They say dat-
ing is the first step toward mar-
riage.
In a survey of 25 modern Or-
thodox, Conservative and Re-
form Jewish high school
students who attend Southfield-
Lathrup High School or B'nai
B'rith youth group functions, 60
percent said they did not feel in-
terfaith dating is wrong. Thir-
ty-five percent said they have
dated outside the faith, and 40
percent say their parents ap-
prove of them dating outside the