ternatives

CROSSING THE LINE

LESLEY PEARL

STAFF WRITER

Sparks fly in
the heart and
the community
when Jews and
gentiles get
together.

This is the first In a series of
regular features exploring
alternative lifestyles affecting
Jewish singles and families.

rowing up in Detroit's
Palmer Park area in the
1970s, Nancy (Pollack)
Gietzen didn't have a lot
of opportunity to social-
ize with other Jews.
That was OK with her.
Mrs. Gietzen liked the
diversity of her neigh-
borhood and the experi-
ence of attending Cass
Technical High School.
However, living in Detroit
kept Mrs. Gietzen at odds
when she did meet up with
Jews.
Perhaps, she said, that
is why she married a gen-
tile.

In seventh grade, the
Pollacks and other Palmer
Park parents decided to
have their children sent to
Oak Park schools. Even
today, Mrs. Gietzen still
remembers Oak Park as
one of the worst experi-
ences of her life.
"It was horrible. The one
or two kids I did befriend
were not allowed to come
to my house because I
lived in Detroit," Mrs.
Gietzen said. "The Jewish
kids were pounding on me
emotionally because we
had nothing in common.
They were listening to

Donny Osmond and I
was listening to the
Funkadelics."
The differences spanned
more than musical taste.
And even when Mrs.
Gietzen returned to
Detroit schools in ninth
grade, she continued to
encounter distant behavior
from her Jewish peers.
Mrs. Gietzen joined
B'nai B'rith Girls at the
prompting of her cousin.
Members would not attend
meetings or parties at the
Pollacks' home because
she lived in Detroit.
"This really affected me.

This was supposed to be
my community as a Jew,"
Mrs. Gietzen said.
Dating was never much
discussed in the home, but
Mrs. Gietzen believes she
may have made an uncon-
scious decision at that
time not to date Jewish
men.
"The few Jews I did date
had very different view-
points of what was accept-
able and what was impor-
tant," Mrs. Gietzen said.
In October 1984, on a
blind date, she found
someone whose values
closely matched her own
— Jim Gietzen.
On the date, Nancy
asked Jim if he had voted
for Ronald Reagan. He
said no. "OK. Now I can
date you," she said, and
two months later she
moved in with him.
Nancy and Jim married
in 1986. A judge per-
formed the ceremony with
no mention of God.
"My mother recognized
this was a good relation-
ship," Mrs. Gietzen said.
"Her only concern was Jim
would want the children
baptized — if we ever had

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