Pola Friedman and Arnie Sleutelberg

A Hesitancy
To Confront AIDS

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Staff Writer

p

ola Friedman, whose
brother, Mark, died of
AIDS nearly three
years ago, at the age of 36,
says "it is important for the
Jewish community to be
more open and forthright
about AIDS." She shared
her memories of her brother,
and her assertion that the
community needs to do more
about the disease, at a recent
meeting of the women's divi-
sion of the Jewish Federa-
tion of Detroit. Echoing Ms.
Friedman's sentiments, and
discussing his pastoral in-
volvement with AIDS pa-
tients, was Rabbi Arnie
Sleutelberg of Congregation
Shir Tikvah, who asserted
that Jewish law commands
our compassion for all those
who are ill.
Ms. Friedman said she has
a need to speak to the com-
munity about her brother,
and his plight, as a means of
keeping his memory alive.
And she feels the community
needs to listen.
Ms. Friedman read an
essay written by her
daughter, chronicling her
experiences with her Uncle
Mark, which spoke of his
sparkling blue eyes, his
child-like nature and his
success in directing Raising
Arizona and Miller's Cross-

ing.

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About six years ago, Mark
passed out on the set of Rais-
ing Arizona. Upon returning
to New York he was
hospitalized. Ms. Friedman
was immediately worried.
"There was a lot of misin-
formation about AIDS at
that time. But I knew he was
gay, and at that time it made
him more susceptible. That
is not true anymore, though.
We're all at risk," Ms.
Friedman said.
Doctors said Mark did not

have AIDS because he did
not have pneumonia. AZT
helped prolong Mark's life.
In his last days, Mark's
friends in New York took
care of him in shifts.
"Because Mark got sick
early on there was no help
for us in the Jewish com-
munity," Ms. Friedman
said. "PFLAG (Parents and
Friends of Lesbians and
Gays, a nonsectarian sup-
port group) was helpful.
But it always met in a chur-
ch which made me uncom-
fortable. Thankfully there is
the Michigan Jewish AIDS
Coalition now."
Rabbi Sleutelberg's expe-
riences with AIDS started in
New York, when he was a
seminary student. Four peo-
ple spoke to his class about
AIDS, and one of the– I
speakers was infected.
"I was so deeply moved,
and I learned there was a lot _I
I could do," Rabbi Sleutelberg
said.
He began visiting clinics,
homes and hospitals of peo-
ple infected with the disease.
When he moved to Michigan
he immediately volunteered
for the AIDS Interfaith
Network — a group
educating the masses about
AIDS.
"Jewish values say visit
the sick, have compassion
and truth, repair the world.
This includes those infected
by AIDS," Rabbi Sleutelberg
said.
He suggested spending
time with those infected, let-
ting them know they are not
cut off from the world and
showing them a support
system to depend on.
Jeanette Shallel of JFS
noted that her organization
has educated all its workers
and volunteers about AIDS
and is currently working
with Hospice of South East-
ern Michigan to develop a
Jewish Hospice to help AIDS
patients.

❑

