ry that message through the distance
that separates you. The only thing that
can bridge the distance is authentic
speech, speech that comes from some-
where deeper inside ourselves. "We
use words as tools," wrote Abraham
Joshua Heschel. "We forget that words
are a repository of the spirit."
We pray in words because to speak
' one's own sorrows is to learn them.
‘The prophet promised that one day
God would take away our heart of stone
)
and replace it with a heart of flesh. We
seek to do that for ourselves when
we lift our voices in sincere
prayer, which is never free
of both gratitude and
---•-,--:-.-_________-
anger, anguish and
- . _-_------
- • ---.:_
—_-,
anticipation. The
---,,
,
prayer is a
way of say-
#4
144
ing to God: "You see that we seek to Nidre service, it inaugurates the most
know ourselves. Help us know our- awesome day on the Jewish calendar,
selves through prayer to You." A prayer Yom Kippur, the day of atonement. The
is a plumbline dropped down to the cen- beginning of such a holiday should cor-
ter of the soul, a line to disclose our own respond to its loftiness. At the outset of
depths. that day, one would expect wrenching
Seeking to say all that we can, we en- themes of repentance. As night falls
deavor to go deeper than that which and the holiday begins, a hush takes
can be spoken. Prayer is always mov- over the congregation, and a beauti-
ing toward, but never quite arriving at, ful melody, a haunting minor-keyed
silence. Even the "silent meditation" in masterpiece, is chanted by a cantor.
Instead of chanting about sin, about
the Jewish prayer service, the Amidah,
is really supposed to be audibly, al- the terrible wrongs that human beings
though softly, spoken. The worshiper do to one another, however, the cantor
must hear his or her own words. To chants about vows. All vows, obliga-
speak words in the recesses of the lions, promises, reads the prayer, that
heart is not the same as to hear them we have made to God and were not
spoken. Words buried inside do not able to fulfill, may they all be counted
have the force of words that have been as nothing. May they be erased. In the
heard, even if they have been heard most prevalent version of the prayer,
only by the ears of the speaker. To think we pray not that the vows of the past
"I love you" or to think "I am alone" year be annulled, but that the vows we
does not wrack the body quite the way will make in the following year, the
that the words — recklessly tossed into vows of the future, be made invalid. It
the world, or painfully brought forth by is a curious choice of prayer at the most
one — can make us shiver with the solemn moment of the year.
Yom Kippur concentrates on sins we
startling sound of our own truth.
Only in speaking words do we dis- have committed in the past, which de-
cover what is beneath them. Words are mand reparation and atonement. It is
the keys to unlatch locks that guard al- therefore peculiar indeed to choose this
coves of the heart, hidden preserves sacred moment to speak about vows
that can be entered and touched only and promises. Were the prayer a lilting
with the aid of speech. Having tapped evocation of evil deeds and consequent
the well within us, we then advance past sorrow, were we praying that God for-
words. We hope to come to the mo- get and forgive all the wrongs we have
ment when all language is exhausted, done, it would seem in perfect harmo-
and the night hangs heavy and mean- ny with the tenor of the day. For Yom
ings we did not know were inside us Kippur is devoted primarily to wrongs
make their way to God. done to other people. But we begin with
In the Jewish tradition, no sound is this yearning to erase promises that we
lost, no utterance unheard. The have not yet made, promises not be-
ephemeral word outlasts the stone. tween people (which can be canceled
God's gift is to attend to the pleas of only by the parties involved), but be-
human beings, to what Wordsworth tween the individual and God.
The meaning of this ritual becomes
called "the still, sad music of humani-
ty." Judaism hearteningly affirms that clear in light of all we have learned so
God hears when all is still and sad. God far. Words are never mere words. A
hears as well when our music is joyous, promise is not an insubstantial matter.
triumphant; when it is vicious, and Words spoken to God are real. When
when it is tender. No chord is lost. As we promise and do not fulfill, we un-
the Psalmist writes (139:4) "There is derstand that the intentions, and their
not a word on my tongue but that You, form, the words, are still stuck to our
souls. We need release because words
0 Lord, know it well."
At the holiest moment of the Jewish bind. The Midrash teaches that for God
year is a strange service. Called the Kol to speak a word is equivalent to God's
performing an action. With the Divine,
From In Speech and In Silence by David' Wolpe.
Copyright ©1992, David J. Wolpe. Reprinted by the word and the action are somehow
the same. Although we aspire to that
arrangement with Henry Holt & Co., Inc
Prayer is
always
moving
toward,
but never
quite
arriving at,
silence.