a

:

..J-nwanted by Jews or gentiles, the baby died.

Jewish couples willing to
take disabled children.
Mrs. Krystal says her first
choice is always a Jewish
Cane, but JFS must consid-
er "what's in the best inter-
st of the child." What, she
asks, should the agency do
f it's a choice between a
ess-than-ideal home that's
swish or a gentile house-
old that would be excellent
or the child? Often, this de-
cision will be left to the birth
other.
Mrs. Krystal also works
ith JCAN, with which she
as a good relationship.
ey've done a terrific job."
Before JCAN, she says,
there was little hope for the
most difficult-to-place chil-
dren. Mrs. Krystal recalls a
recent case of a baby born
severely handicapped.
At birth, after the parents
(realized the severity of his
.
'disabilities, the baby was
placed for adoption with De-
troit Social Services. The

child, Mrs. Krystal says, was
essentially a vegetable.
He was kept for awhile at
a local hospital, where nurs-
es oversaw his care. Then
several months later, un-
wanted by either Jewish or
gentile parents, he died.

ennifer, the little girl
with Sotos syndrome,
smiles at the camera-
man, jumping from be-
hind a corner to call, "Peek
a boo!"
Later, she's in the foster
family's back yard. "Play,"
she says when her foster
mother asks Jennifer what
she wants to do. "Play."
She pushes around an
empty stroller and swings
by herself, her feet barely
touching the ground. Later,
she takes a plastic shovel
and sits in a sandbox.
In another sequence, Jen-
nifer is at the family's
kitchen table. After finish-

ing breakfast, she sets her
cereal bowl in the sink, then
goes to put on her shoes.
There's a party at school to-
day.
"Will Katie be there?" her
foster mother asks.
"Yes!"
"Suzanne, too?"
"Yes!" Jennifer calls, star-
ing into the camera.
The last shot is in a field.
Several children — a girl
with curly red hair, a boy in
shorts — run through the
grass. An older man, Jen-
nifer's foster grandfather,
walks with them.
Jennifer is there, too, but
she's not paying attention to
the video this time. Wearing
pink pants and a flowered
shirt, she wanders through
the rocks and the weeds.
In a moment it will be
time to go. Then, her back to
the camera, Jennifer will
walk alone as she begins the
long journey home. ❑

Jennifer is one of hundreds of
disabled Jewish children who
needs a home..

Finding Help

ELIZABETH APPLEBAUM

Assistant Editor

t never occurred to Eliezer Goldstock to place his
Down syndrome daughter, Sara Mushka, up for
adoption.
It never occurred to him that she wasn't perfect just
the way she is.
What did trouble him was "a moment of loneliness"
he felt when Sara Mushka was born and he wasn't
sure where to turn. He didn't know how to find out
more about Down syndrome. He didn't know what
support groups existed for parents with special-needs
children. He didn't know what Jewish services were
available for his daughter.
So he started his own organization.
Heart to Heart, based in Monsey, N.Y., offers as-
sistance to new parents of special-needs children. With
branches in Detroit, San Francisco, Los Angeles and
Toronto, Heart to Heart provides both equipment,
such as wheelchairs, and counseling to the families.
A psychologist, Dr. Goldstock says his first step is
to meet with parents at the hospital, soon after they've
learned they have a disabled baby. Though his pref-
erence is to see children stay with their biological par-
ents, he recognizes this isn't always possible — in
which case he will help the family find a Jewish home
for the child.
It troubles him that so many in the Jewish com-
munity seem to be uneasy relating to new parents
of the disabled. When Sara Mushka was born, "our
friends didn't call to say mazel toy; rabbis didn't feel
comfortable coming to see us. Whether Orthodox, Con-
servative or Reform — most people simply don't know
how to deal with the issue."
Dr. Goldstock sees all children, regardless of their
disability, as beings created in the image of God.
"What I tell new parents is that this is a very spe-
cial gift they've been given," he§ays.
He acknowledges that raising special-needs chil-
dren can be a challenge. But of his own daughter he
says, "She's a tzadik (righteous person) because she's
here not for herself but for others. She doesn't need
to fix herself up; she's here to make sure others fix
themselves up."
For information, contact Dr. Goldstock at Heart
to Heart, 22 Rita Ave., Monsey, N.Y. 10952, or call
(914) 356-6204.
Vicki Krausz can be reached at the Jewish Chil-
dren's Adoption Network, P.O. Box 16544, Denver,
Colo., 80216, or call (303) 573-8113.
Keshet, a local support group for parents of special-
needs children, may be reached at 5564 Beauchamp
Pl., West Bloomfield, MI 48322.

I

THE DETROIT JEWISH NEWS

27

