p

The Cultural Commission
of
Congregation Shaarey Zedek

Tragedy

Continued from Page 1

proudly presents

The Thirteenth Annual
Peter & Clara Weisberg Concert

"Music to Remember"

Featuring

Renowned Violinist

DANIEL HEIFETZ

Accompanied by

SAMUEL SANDERS

Pianist

Wednesday, June 3, 1992 —1:30 P.M.

at Congregation Shaarey Zedek

27375 Bell Road, Southfield

GENERAL ADMISSION FREE

There will be reserved seating and an Afterglow for Patrons only.

Reserve by calling 357-5544

FREE

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22

FRIDAY, MAY 29, 1992

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i'AMERICAN

SOCIETY
CANCER.

one week after their mar-
psychotherapist Helene
riage. Mr. Binder later wed
Lockman, who recently
Linda Gutman, also the
helped coordinate the Inter-
child of survivors. They had
national Colloquium on
one son, Justin.
Anxiety, held in Jerusalem.
The couple separated April
"It's disturbing because we,
17; a few days later, Linda
might find a piece of
filed for divorce.
ourselves (in the perpetra-
"I saw him Sunday (May
tor)."
17)," Frances Binder said.
Mrs. Lockman described
"He gave no indication that
suicide as "the most des-
anything was wrong."
perate act," the deed of
On May 20, Michael paid
someone who feels complete-
his bill at the hotel in Farm-
ly helpless.
ington Hills where he had
"We may look at our
been staying since the
neighbor and say, 'He
separation. He drove home,
always looks so happy,' but,
shot Linda, then drove to a
then these very people come
phone booth at 14 Mile and
to my office," she said.
Gratiot where he called and
"They've just learned to
asked to speak to his wife.
mask the pain enough toc.=
But by then she already was
make it through each day."
dead.
Halachah (Jewish law)
Mr. Binder next went to
obligates Jews to look after
the Chesed Shel Emes
one another. Those concern-
cemetery, where his first
ed about their neighbor's
wife and parents are buried.
mental health should rec-
There, he shot and killed
ommend in an appropriate,-
himself.
manner that he seek
Friends offered various
counseling.
theories as to what drove
"Don't say, 'You need
Michael Binder to the kill-
help,' " Mrs. Lockman ad-=
ing, but no one knows for
vised. "Suggest it, instead.
certain what went wrong.
"If only he would have
gone to some of his friends,"
"If only he would
Frances Binder lamented.
have gone to some
"But nobody wants to know
of his friends."
you when you have
troubles."
Frances Binder
Rabbi Shaiall Zachariash
of Congregation Shomrey
Emunah knew both Michael
Say, 'Have you considered
and Linda Binder. He said
seeking help?' or 'Have you -
it's important for anyone
ever thought of seeing a -
troubled to realize that help
therapist?' "
is as close as the local syn-
Signs that someone might
agogue.
need help include obsessive-,
"Like everyone else, Jews
behavior, such as drinking
have problems — and some
too much, or the sense that
are afraid to admit it,"
"something is missing from
Rabbi Zachariash said. "But
my life."
this is not specifically a Jew-
Rabbi Arm cautioned that,
ish community problem; it's
in the coming weeks, Linda
a human problem."
Binder's family must be__
He noted that numerous
treated with special care and
local Jewish organizations
compassion.
offer private counseling. In
"No one should have to
addition, "people shouldn't
endure what they are going ct,
feel any hesitancy about
through," he said. "They
contacting their rabbi," he
will have to live with that
said. "Every rabbi you turn
nightmare for umpteen
to will advise and counsel
years."
and, if needed, direct you to
"The worst is yet to come,"
appropriate help."
added a family friend. The
Being a member of a con-
greatest loneliness and an-
gregation is not a prere-
guish sets in after shiva, the
quisite for seeking assis-
week-long mourning period,
tance, Rabbi Zachariash
is over, he said.
stressed.
"What can you say (to the — --
"Rabbis are obligated to
grieving family)?" Rabbi
help every Jew," he said. "I
Arm said. "Everything
don't know of any rabbi who
seems so inadequate."
would turn away a person in
The rabbi cited a Torah
need."
passage in which Aaron's
"Incidents like this make
two sons are suddenly,
us feel uncomfortable be-
mysteriously consumed by r.
cause they force us to reflect
"a strange fire" in which
seriously on our own lives,"
they perish.
he said of the Binder case.
Aaron's only response is si-
"It shakes people to the
lence, Rabbi Arm said. c'
very core of their being,"
"There was nothing he could
added Farmington Hills
say." ❑