I CLOSE-UP

C O
O B S ESSIO N

a life of personal torment
and even death.
Experts say the
stereotypic Jewish family
can be ripe for either one of
these eating disorders.
Jacqueline Odoms, an area
psychotherapist who spe-
cializes in eating disorders,
said the diseases manifest
themselves in families of
chaos or control.
Typically, the control
model is a family where the
child is expected to perform
well in school, to attend
college and to succeed.
Often, according to Ms.
Odoms, decisions will be
made for the child all of his
life. These decisions in-
clude the most miniscule,
such as what condiment to
put on a hamburger.
Becoming a victim of an
eating disorder can be a
way of achieving control,
even if that control hurts.
Then there's the chaotic
side, a family lifestyle that
can be described as
dysfunctional, perhaps
where there is alcoholism
or abuse. This can lead to
anorexia or bulimia.
Feelings of inferiority

24

FRIDAY, MAY 22, 1992

will motivate a young per-
son to lose the weight, to
conform to the image of the
more-beautiful-than-life
movie actress or the models
on the grocery store maga-
zine covers. Someone will
come along and tell the
person she "looks nice!'
That's good to hear, but
typically whom she sees in
the mirror doesn't look
very nice.
Anorexia and bulimia
enter the lives of mostly
females from the ages of 11
to 60.
Barb, 18, is "a nice Jew-
ish girl," who was a cheer-
leader for her high school,
had perfect grades and is a
freshman at Michigan.
"I was trying to be the
perfect girl for my
parents," she said. "But all
I really wanted to do was
find ways to get back at
them. I wanted something
that wasn't theirs, that
was all mine, that I could
control myself. I learned
when I was 16 that I could
control what I ate, and how
I ate it."
At first, Barb thought
vomiting was a good way to

lose weight, and she did so
successfully. Though she
didn't want anyone to
know what she was doing,
she learned that other high
school girls — girls she
knew — did the same
thing. It wasn't until she
lost 10 pounds in one week
that a teacher intervened.
"It got to a point where I
couldn't stop what I was
doing," she said. "That's
when I needed help. I think
it's horrible what society
does to people, especially
women. Women, more than
men, have to have the ideal
body."
West Bloomfield-based
psychotherapist Eileen
Freedland sees eating dis-
orders as a phenomenon of
the '80s and '90s. Civiliza-
tions have always suffered
from some sort of eating
disorder. Along with the
positive emphasis on
health and fitness came a
negative emphasis on
unreachable expectations.
But Ms. Freedland warns
sternly that eating dis-
orders are not just about
wanting to look the ideal.
Eating disorders, she said,

are outside signs of inside
psychological pain. That
pain, she said, can range
from early childhood
trauma, sex abuse, the
death of a parent, the
divorce of parents, or a
major illness of another
family member.

"They haven't learned to
care for themselves," she
said. "A lot of this is found
in Jewish families. There's
an overprotection, not allow-
ing children to make deci-
sions. Also, achievement
and success are very impor-
tant, and so is looking good!'

Under this cloak of over-
protection comes the feel-
ing, according to Ms.
Odom, that nothing can be
done right to please the
parents. Not eating is the
only thing that can be done
well. This is an attempt,
she said, to manage one's
internal conflict.
"It hurts not to eat," said
Ms. Odom, "but it hurts
less than facing what's
happening in their lives.
Yes, they are creating
pain. But they are in con-
trol of that pain."

Ms. Odom added that it is
not uncommon for an
eating disorder to be just
part of an array of
psychological difficulties,
including self-mutilation,
promiscuity, compulsive
gambling, compulsive
shopping and even shop-
lifting.
"Young women go to
great lengths to maintain
their thinness," said Ms.
Odom. "Their self-worth is
determined by their body
size. When they come to us
for treatment, we have to
teach them that they are
worthwhile people because
when they come to us, they
don't see anything good
about themselves."
Ms. Odom said anorexics
and bulimics have an
enormous fear of fat. They
count calories so much that
they become experts at
caloric intake and the
calorie count of many diff-
erent foods.
Suffering from an eating
disorder also takes a great
deal of hard work, accor-
ding to Ms. Freedland.
Anorexics and bulimics
will suck on stones to avoid