UP FRONT

Labor's Paradox

Yitzhak Rabin, a "hawk," was elected to lead the
party but the new slate has .a "dovish" slant.

INA FRIEDMAN

Israel Correspondent

F

asten your seat belts,
ladies and gentlemen.
The two major parties
in Israel have picked their
list of Knesset candidates,
and now the roller coaster
that will carry them up to
peaks of euphoria, down
through vales of despair, and
undoubtedly to a few loop-
the-loops along the way is
setting out on its 12-week
ride.
In fact, it already began its
first swing last week when,
in back-to-back dramas, the
Labor Party hit its first high
— after electing an unusual-
ly young, refreshing, and
problematic Knesset slate —
and the Likud hit its first
low as the result of yet an-
other domestic spat starring
(who else?) Foreign Minister
David Levy.
Mr. Levy proved to be a
pretty sore loser about not
placing higher on the Likud
slate. But after threatening
to quit to establish his own
party and then join in a co-
alition with Labor, he and
Prime Minister Shamir
reached a compromise of
sorts, with Mr. Levy getting
most of what he wanted.
Namely, to remain as For-

eign Minister in the next
government, should Likud
win, and keep his largely
honorary title of Deputy
Prime Minister.
But Mr. Shamir has a long
record of cutting deals under
duress and reneging on them
when it comes time to pay.
No sooner had the ink dried
on the Shamir-Levy agree-
ment than the papers leaked

Last week the
Labor Party hit its
first high and Likud
its first low.

details of the prime min-
ister's plan for "revenge"
after the elections.
The beat goes on.
The bout of blood-letting in
the Likud seemed all the
more dramatic because of
the contrasting mood in the
Labor Party as it emerged
from the second round of its
primaries. The results of this
bold experiment (by Israeli
standards) in internal-party
democracy created a spurt of
euphoria followed by some-
thing of a morning-after
effect when Labor realized
that its Knesset slate had
created almost as many
problems as it had solved.
"It's not pleasant to throw

cold water on the cheer,"
wrote Ha'aretz columnist
Uzi Benziman, but "what
was born to Labor is a her-
maphrodite with two heads,
lots of left hands, conflicting
nervous systems, and a cur-
vature of the spine."
The short-lived "high"
resulted from the fact that
the primary had helped the
party rid itself of some dead
wood and introduce a long-
needed sense of rejuvena-
tion. In some ways it also
helped Labor catch up to
(and occasionally surpass)
the Likud, which had opened
its ranks to fresh faces in the
1980s.
In fact, a comparison of the
two parties' slates (of 40
candidates) shows their
makeup to be fairly similar.
The Likud has 14 candidates
of Sephardic origin; Labor
only one less. The Likud has
10 candidates aged 45 and
under; Labor 14. The Likud
has 12 new faces on its list;
Labor 14.
Neither party has a repre-
sentative of the newly arriv-
ed Russian immigrants, and
both have minimum repre-
sentation of minorities
(Arabs and women). The
only way in which the two
lists differ sharply is in the
number of people with a pro-
fessional grasp of defense af-

©1992 international Copyright by CA FITOONEWS Inc.. N.Y.C., USA

fairs: Labor's slate boasts six
retired generals, the Likud
but one.
And yet, the primaries left
Labor with a strange
paradox on its hands. Six
weeks ago it elected Yitzhak
Rabin to head its slate on the
grounds that his "hawkish"
image would draw voters
away from the Likud.
Last week it appeared to
scrap that idea by building a
slate with a distinctively
moderate slant — which the
Likud was quick to dub a
"dovecote with Rabin
trapped inside." And if that

weren't confusing enough,
the primary boosted up to
third place (right behind Mr.
Rabin and Shimon Peres)
Avraham Burg, a 37- year-
old observant Jew who has
been crusading for such pop-
ular (if unrealistic) causes as
divorcing "church" and
state and drafting the cur-
rently exempt yeshivah
students (whose number has
ballooned to some 23,000).
Mr.Burg, the son of
longtime cabinet member
Yosef Burg, is a red rag to
some Orthodox parties —
and Labor will need them to

Hmmm. And are you sure,
really sure, that you mailed
an invitation to everyone
who should get one? Come
on, I bet you've forgotten
someone. Someone, no doubt,
who will be really be mad at
you for omitting his name.
Someone who will need
years of expensive therapy
to get over what you've done
to him.
What about the bar mitz-
vah boy himself. Is Gumby
really prepared for the big
day? Are you sure he knows
his stuff? Will he be able to
deliver his speech with the
requisite amount of sinceri-
ty? Is that new suit going to
do him justice?
And don't forget Aunt
Millie. I'm sure she's going
to bring that bonehead boy-
friend of hers. Where did she
find Roger? Is he going to
make a scene with the rabbi
again? Does he really have
to pass judgment on each

and every one of the rabbi's
sermons? And is he going to
wear that green polyester
suit? Oh, no. Please. Not the
green polyester suit.
Don't get comfortable,
either, just because the
ceremony itself is over and
done with. There's still plen-
ty of time for things to go
wrong.
Take those thank-you
notes. Let's talk about
thank-you notes. How many
hours are you going to have
to spend nagging Gumby to
write them? Is his hand-
writing even legible? And
what can he possibly say to
Roger to thank him — thank
him
for that green
polyester tie? Oy!
Stay tuned next April for
more thought-provoking
anxiety thrills.

ROUND UP

Making A List,
Checking It Twice

Many Good Reasons
To Be Anxious

The Rabbinical Board of
Greater New York, in con-
junction with the National
Halachah Hotline, is offer-
ing via fax a chametz
checklist for Passover.
The list includes items and
places that must be
thoroughly cleaned for
Pesach and is available at no
charge.
To receive the checklist,
call the Halachah Hotline's
Passover number, (718) 387-
8050 or (718) 963-1236 and
leave a fax number. For gen-
eral questions about the
holiday, call the Halachah
Hotline, (212) 425-2242.

Oh, happy day! Here's
good news sure to make
everybody delighted!
You know about Pesach.
You know about April Fool's
Day. But do you know the
really important focus of
April?
I'm speaking, of course,
about National Anxiety
Month (I am not making this
up) — observed with due
solemnity each April.
So, just for fun, let's in-
dulge some of your worst
anxieties. Get ready to
celebrate!
Just imagine next week is
the bar mitzvah of your son,
Gumby. Now, let's think.
What could possibly go
wrong?
First, consider the invita-
tion. Are you sure, are you
really sure, you printed the
correct bar mitzvah date?

Hadassah Opens
New Trauma Center

Hadassah Hospital late
last month dedicated a new
medical center trauma unit,

Dr. Avi Rivkind, left, head of
Hadassah's new trauma unit, and
Jerusalem Mayor Teddy Kollek.

the first of its kind in Israel.
The unit is designed to
save lives within the first
hour a patient is inflicted
with multiple injuries.
Trauma — which affects vic-
tims of accident, war and
crime — is one of the leading
causes of death from infancy
to age 50 both in the United
States and Israel.
The new facility, which in-
cludes four surgeons and six
nurses, is equipped with an
X-ray unit that can travel
bed-to-bed by remote control.

—

Compiled by
Elizabeth Applebaum

THE DETROIT JEWISH NEWS 11

