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MINI MIMI- MINI
III= MIME MIME MIME t
FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 22, 1991
RITA CHARLESTON
Special to The Jewish News
C
omedian Dennis Wolf-
berg says he got some
of his best material
from his 12 years as a sixth-
grade teacher in New York's
tough South Bronx
neighborhood.
"My school was so tough it
had its own coroner and the
school newspaper had an
obituary column," Mr.
Wolfberg recalls. "I once
assigned an essay on the topic
`What I want to be if I grow
up.' At show and tell, one of
my students brought in a sub-
poena."
Though Mr. Wolfberg gave
teaching a chance for more
than a decade, it was never
his first career choice. A self-
described "nice, compliant
son of classic Jewish parents!'
Mr. Wolfberg attended
Queens College ("which
ranks on a par with the Na-
tional Bartenders Institute"),
and took pre-med courses. He
later earned a master's
degree in clinical psychology.
"But I never wanted to be a
teacher or a psychologist," he
admits. "I always dreamed of
becoming an entertainer.
That was my lifelong fantasy,
which gives you some idea of
how pathetically limited my
fantasies were!'
So in 1976, without leaving
the security of his teaching
job, Mr. Wolfberg auditioned
one night for a spot at a New
York City comedy club. "It
was 3 a.m. and there were two
people in the audience who
promptly left as soon as I took
the stage so I had an audience
of zero!'
Undaunted, but with no one
around from whom to elicit
laughs, Mr. Wolfberg picked
up the guitar he always car-
ried with him and started to
sing "Bye-Bye Miss American
Pie!' which turned out to be
the club owner's favorite song.
"He liked me, hired me and
boom," Mr. Wolfberg laughs,
"I was in show business. And
the rest, they say, is history!"
It wasn't, however, as easy
as he pretends. Billed as a
singer, Mr. Wolfberg added
comedy to his act, but with
constant dread. "I didn't come
out from behind the guitar for
three years, even after I stop-
ped playing it. I was so afraid
I wouldn't get laughs, I think
I started to use my eyes in a
funny way to increase my
chances. If the joke wasn't
funny, maybe my face would
be. Beyond that, my style just
sort of evolved!'
Dennis Wolfberg
Today, as early in his career,
one of Mr. Wolfberg's
signatures is his bulging eyes.
"Some people have bedroom
eyes," he notes. "I have
headlight eyes."
His punch lines, too, con-
tinue to be delivered by a man
who seems to fear he will be
pulled off stage at any
minute, emphasizing words
and syllables to make sure
the audience gets the
message: "I was in Mobile,
Alabama, where men are
men and Jews are BAIT .. .
We were very Reform Jews.
Our rabbi was a part-time
PORK distributor."
Mr. Wolfberg also continues
his anecdotal style of comedy,
reflecting on his life and
various changes he goes
through, from his youth and
the complexities of being
Jewish, to the painful narra-
tion of his complete physical
examination and the subse-
quent prescription of fiber
cereal, "the nuclear laxative
in a box," to his marriage and
the rigors of natural
childbirth as prescribed by
the "Marquis de Lamaze!'
In 1980, the same year he
turned professional come-
dian, Mr. Wolfberg met fellow
comedian Jeannie McBride.
The two became fast friends,
worked the comedy circuit in
tandem, married in 1985 and
became the proud parents of
Daniel in 1987.
"My wife is half-Jewish," he
says. "And that makes my
parents half-crazy!"
Today Mr. Wolfberg has the
opportunity to reflect on his
life as a husband and father
in his act. "We just found out
we are expecting twins.
That's God's way of saying
you've slept enough!"
Actually, Mr. Wolfberg ad-
mits he is very much a fami-
ly man who, at the age of 44,
continues to look forward
with great joy to having
children while continuing his
climb up the comedy ladder.
Voted America's "Top Male
Comedian of 1989" by Rave
magazine, and nominated as
"Best Male Stand-up" at the
American Comedy Awards,
Mr. Wolfberg is quite happy
with the way his career is
shaping up.
A regular guest on all the
major daytime and night-time
TV talk shows, he also hosted
for Regis Philbin recently
when Mr. Philbin was struck
with an attack of kidney
stones.
"In fact," remembers Mr.
Wolfberg, "as a token of my
appreciation for all that ex-
posure on national television,
I sent him an enormous
calcium tablet.
"But seriously," he con-
cludes, "television exposure
has greatly enhanced my
career, as it would for any per-
former. So I'm very happy
with the way my life is going.
For the future, I just look for-
ward to being even happier
and sharing some of that hap-
piness with audiences
everywhere." ❑
Youth Symphony
Sets Concert
The Metropolitan Youth
Symphony, consisting of 250
young people in three or-
chestras led by prominent
music educators, will present
its winter concert 7 p.m. Feb.
24 in Orchestra Hall. The
musicians, ranging from 5th
through 12th grades, come
from over fifty communities
in the tri-county area.
The String Orchestra will
be conducted by Jackqueline
Coleman, department head
and director of the middle
school music program at
Detroit Country Day School.
Richard Piippo, conductor of
the Concert Orchestra, is a
cellist as well as teacher and
conductor at Wayne State
University. His musicians
will play the Symphony #8 in
G Major, opus 88 by Dvorak
from the original score.
Alan McNair is concert-
master and assistant conduc-
tor of the Rochester Sym-
phony and orchestra director
at Troy High School. His sym-
phony orchestra will play the
entire Symphony #5 in E
Minor by Tchaikovsky.
For ticket information, call
644-8105 or 375-0206.