Family Matters

A PERFECT SETTING FOR YOUR WEDDING...

In our magnificent sanctuary surrounded by
stained glass windows
plus A BEAUTIFUL BANQUET HALL at:

Congregation B'nai David

• Newly refurbished foyer & social hall
• Accommodations for 60 to 360
• Lovely bride's room
• Available to members & non-members
• Rabbinical, cantorial & catering staff
• Well-lit, free and ample parking
• Easy access to major hotels/airport
for out-of-town guests

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24350 Southfield Road
Southfield

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661-4050
557-8210

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BERKLEY FLOWER SHOP

Party Flower Specialists
Serving All Your Floral Needs
LARRY STOCKER CEIL STOCKER SANDI STOCKER

3071 W. TWELVE MILE RD.

70 Brides

1991

544.45(W

the groom doesn't meet their expec-
tations.
"Even if they don't like the groom,
they'll think, 'It's OK, she likes him,
she'll be happy,' " Dr. Gershenfeld
says.
Although some experts say that
after the wedding, couples become
closer to the bride's parents than to
the groom's parents — a frequent
cause of feelings of loss among par-
ents of the groom — several parents
reported that that isn't always the
case. TWo of Baltimore, Md., resident
Vivian Adelberg Rudow's three sons
were married within the past five
years. Today, she and her husband are
in close contact both with their sons
and with their daughters-in-law. She
and her daughters-in-law like to do
"girly" things together, like shopping
for clothes and getting their ears
pierced.
"My grandmothers were very jeal-
ous of the wives of their sons, but I'm
so happy to have everyone in the
family," says Ms. Rudow. "Each time
a woman comes into the house, it's
like a sigh of relief."

As major life-cycle events, weddings
often stir up feelings from the past,
experts say. Parents of the bride or
groom may find themselves thinking
about their own weddings, or about
weddings of their friends. They may
grow sad at the realization that
people who were present at their
wedding won't be at this one.

Often, parents will apply feelings
from their own past experiences to
their children's weddings. One mother
remembered how her mother had
been somewhat stingy with the
groom's family — not permitting them
to invite the same number of guests
as the bride's family, for example —
and became determined not to
behave in the same manner during
her daughter's wedding. Dr.
Rosenberg, of Hopkins Medical
School, was about to enter the
military when he married, so he ex-
perienced a recurrence of that
tension at his son's wedding.
Weddings also cause some parents
to start feeling their age. "There's a
recognition that hey, I'm not as young
as I used to be." Rabbi Saltzman says.