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JEWISH
SMOOZE
P U R I M 1 9 9 0
0 Detroit Jewish News and Purim Parade Magazine
ISRAEL TO SELL WESTERN WALL
In a brilliant effort to bridge Israel's budget gap, Prime
Mideast, Yitzhak Shamir announced an enterprising
austerity measure that has been both acclaimed as an
ingenious gesture by most and panned by others as
sacrilege. The plan to sell pieces of the Wailing Wall, will
conceivably raise over S200 million dollars a year in
badly needed revenues.
Inspired by the recent wholesaling of the Berlin Wall.
the plan calls for sections of the Wall to be torn down and
Budgetary Measure
Stirs Controversy
immediately rebuilt out of Jerusalem stone, to give it an
ancient look. Accordin2. to Chaim Banai. minister of con-
struction. "we obviously don't have 12 miles of wall to
market and the supply would certainly overwhelm the de-
mand. if we didn't come up with a bright way to arrange
the sales process. All this really does is recycle the Wall
and give people an opportunity to own a piece of Jewish
history".
The loudest approval came from President George
Bush. who has long advocated that Israel come up with
something major to stimulate its economy. He was par-
ticularly pleased that Israel left no stone unturned in its
efforts to close its budget gap.
Demonstrations In Protest
While some called the plan Israeli ingenuity. religious
UJA Launches
Operation
Leviticus
The United Jewish Appeal, together with
the Council of Jewish Federations, has come
up wth a new formula for the emergency ef-
fort to raise funds for Soviet Jewish
resettlement.
"It's a bit complicated, but these are com-
plicated times," noted Gilda Belt of UJA.
"We're asking people to multiply their social
security number by 19.2, add 11 percent for
gratuities and allow two percent for the
margin of error and make the check out to
UJA-CJF-NBC-IRT."
She added that this is a special, unique,
one-of-a-kind emergency effort, "just like last
year."
Fresh on the heels of Operation Exodus,
the new effort will be known as Operation
Leviticus, according to Geti, "because it deals
with blood and sacrifice and, in the immor-
tal words of George Bush, 'it's part of the
Biblical thing. "
50
FRIDAY, MARCH 9, 1990
leaders vigorously protested the idea. A group called the
No-Sell Ko-sell committee, staged protests at the wall
itself. temporarily displacing the "women of the wall"
who were holding their own protest march. Members of
the group threatened to pull down the government for the
200th time this year if their demands weren't met. A
compromise plan may be in the works. according to the
minister of negotiations.
Prices for the piece will start at S 18.00 per stone and an
additional S18.00 for an optional "kvitel", or personal
note taken from the Wall's cracks.
Interested parties are asked to call the Ministry of Holy
Gifts for details.
SUPREME COURT ALLOWS PASSOVER DISPLAY
T
he Supreme Court has
ruled that a _giant 30-foot-
by-30-foot sheet of matzo
could rightfully be dis-
played next to an already-
existing 30 - foot - tall
chocolate Easter bunny in
front of the Bethlehem
County Building in Beth-
lehem, Pennsylvania.
The city council had
opposed the humongous
matzo on the grounds that
it was a danger to pas-
architect's model of Giant Matzo of Bethlehem next to Easter Bunny.
sersby. Some council members expressed fears that a strong gust of wind might break the
matzo, sending shards of matzo meal crashing atop pedestrians.
"And what happens if the giant bunny starts to drip chocolate over it in the hot sun? We'll
have one gooey mess on our hands," said one council member.
"What's the matter?" the Jewish representative countered, "you never had chocolate-cov-
ered matzo before'?"