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72
FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 2, 1990
he 1980s contained a
slew of Jewish movies.
Some gave us nachas,
such as Crossing Delancey.
Others, like Yentl, gave us
indigestion.
The best should be
rewarded, and the worst
should be exposed.
I call my awards The
Woodies, named after Woody
Allen, the cinematic Spinoza
of existential angst and
romantic tsuris topped with
a schmear of hilarity.
So here are the best and
the brightest, the honorable
mentshen, the bitter and the
sweet, the worst and the
knackwurst.
Funny, He Doesn't
Look Jewish
Jeff Goldblum, The Fly
Goldblum is always The
Jew As Other. In The Big
Chill, he is the only non-
gentile character among the
reunion gang, and
significantly the only one
without a love interest.
When he turns into The Fly,
his lover (and real-life wife)
Geena Davis is scared of
what their baby will look
like. In Earth Girls Are
Easy, he is an outer space
alien trying to assimilate
into Los Angeles (symbolic of
Jewish assimilation prob-
lems, as is Mandy Patinkin's
outer space cop in Alien
Nation and Woody Allen's
chameleon everyman-who-
tries-to-fit-in-everywhere in
Zelig).
Best Jewish
Princess In Space
Daphne Zuniga,
Spaceballs
Mel Brooks' interstellar
satire on the sexist
stereotype casts Daphne as
the spoiled royal heiress of a
planet of Druids. Hence she
is known as "a Druish
princess." And the best
Jewish princess phone is
Joan Rivers, who supplies
the voice for a neurotic
robot.
Best Jewish
Non-Princess
Rosanna Arquette, Baby,
It's You
As the Jewish Juliet who
meets her Roman Romeo
(Vincent Spano) in high
Harry Wasserman writes for
the Wisconsin Jewish
Chronicle in Milwaukee.
school, Rosanna is more into
metaphysics than mate-
rialism, and more into social
consciousness than socializ-
ing. And her Romeo is no
safe suburbanite, but a
working-class kid from the
other side of the Trenton,
N.J., tracks.
The Jewish Woman
To Bring Home To Mom
Amy Irving, Yentl, Cross-
ing Delancey
In Yentl, Amy is so sweet,
even Barbra Streisand falls
in love with her. In Crossing
Delancey, she is equally at
home as cultured career
woman.
Funny, But She
Doesn't Look Jewish
Goldie Hawn, Private Ben-
jamin
Expecting the U.S. Army
to be Club Med with
designer uniforms, Goldie
nevertheless becomes a
stronger woman, but her
Judy Benjamin perpetuates
the sexist when-the-going-
gets-tough, the-tough-go-
shopping Jewish American
Princess stereotype. And
joining the Army is the
wrong way to become a fem-
inist: better to promote con-
traceptive use than Contra
abuse.
The Jewish Woman
Not To Bring Home
Ellen Barkin, Diner
Where Amy Irving is sen-
sitive, Ellen Barkin is sen-
sual, exuding her ethnic
eroticism for the first time in
Diner as a wandering wife
among Baltimore buddy-
boichiks. Her slightly crook-
ed nose and cross-eyed looks
only add to the Hebraic
body-heat she later mastered
in The Big Easy and Sea of
Love.
The Jewish Man
To Bring To Mother
Rick Moranis
A young Woody Allen-type
for the 80s, Moranis may be
neurotic, but he's a hopeless
romantic (Little Shop of
Horrors); a caring father
(Parenthood, Honey, I
Shrunk the Kids); and a good
financial catch (a CPA in
Ghostbusters, promoted to
lawyer in Ghostbusters II).
Worst Stereotype
Of Jewish Mother
Mae Questel, New York
Stories
In Woody Allen's segment
of this Manhattan trilogy,
Mae is the kind of mother
who embarrasses Woody in
front of all New York City by
magically nagging him as a
giant head in the sky. The
segment is funny, but her
grating squeak-speak (she
was the original cartoon
voice for Olive Oyl and Betty
Boop) is the most sexist
stereotype of an overbearing
mother since the late Anne
Ramsey in Throw Momma
From The Train.
The Quintessential
Jewish Mother
Lainie Kazan, My
Favorite Year, Beaches
Kazan has aged gracefully
from the exotic Barbra
Streisand-clone chanteuse I
remember from watching
"The Ed Sullivan Show."
She has become the more
zaftig quintessential Jewish
mother of the 80s, as the
mother in My Favorite Year
and of the young Bette
Midler in Beaches. She
replaces Shelley Winters,
the Jewish mother of the 50s
(Diary of Anne Frank), 60s
(Lolita) and 70s (Next Stop,
Greenwich Village).
Worst Stereotype
Of A Jewish Father
Laurence Olivier, The Jazz
Singer
The late Lord Larry was
great in Shakespeare, but in
his last years his career took
a lamentable turn toward
heavily accented
caricatures, from the
Mengele Nazi in Marathon
Man to immigrant cantor in
The Jazz Singer. In the
latter, his nagging of the
even worse Neil Diamond is
as annoying as any Jewish
mother stereotype.
Jewish Telegraphic Agency.
Country Singers
Play Palace
Country veterans Roy
Clark, Mel Tillis and Ray
Stevens will appear at The
Palace 7:30 p.m. Feb. 14.
There is a charge. For in-
formation, call The Palace,
377-8600.
Children's Museum
Has Benefit
A benefit for the Chil-
dren's Museum Friends will
take place with its second
annual "Great Doll Auc-
tion" 6 p.m. Feb. 14 at the
Roostertail in Detroit.
In its inaugural event last
Valentine's Day, more than
$19,000 was raised.