Bishevat And Ethical Wills By RABBI ALON TOLWIN Tu Bishevat is coming up, and that time of year always makes me think of two things: 1) Tree planting and 2) Ethical wills ... You know the story about a traveler who saw an old man planting a tree. "Old man," he queried, "why are you planting that tree? You'll be gone way before it produces any fruit for you to enjoy!" The old man replied, "I'm not planting this tree for me; I'm planting it for my children who will survive me." We all know people who continue to work after they have amassed a fortune — who keep very busy making investments even though they couldn't possibly spend all of their money in two lifetimes. They do it, like the old man, for their children. As long as we Jews have been concerned with the financial well- being of our children, we have been concerned with their spiritual well- being. We have left 'ethical wills': Documents which contain wisdom gleaned from living Jewish lives, aspiring to help our children achieve greater love, dedication and understanding of God, Torah and the Jewish people. In Maimonides' famous letter to his son Avraham, he writes: "Fear the God of your forefathers ... Love wisdom, seek it as silver ... Tarry at the homes of the wise ... Love truth and righteousness ... On that day I will bequeath to you my possessions, I will hand to you the belief in God ... Be a man of your word ... Take care of your health ..." Nachmanides, the 11th century Talmudic scholar and Jewish leader wrote an ethical will to his children: "Hear, my son, the ethical teachings of your father, and don't scorn the instructions of your mother. Train yourself to speak pleasantly to all people and at all times ... Remove yourself from anger ... Study Torah regularly ... When you stand in prayer, don't allow yourself to get distracted .. . Read this letter once a week .. How did the children of these great leaders remember their fathers and how are they still remembered today? Are they remembered for their wealth? Wealth fades. The message of the ethical will remains forever. We have a great legacy from our parents and grandparents. That legacy is the wisdom of the Torah. Are we able to pass it on to our children? Our grandchildren? What will they remember us for? I was at a funeral some years ago which made an indelible imprint on my being. The deceased was being remembered for his great sense of humor and his flair for dressing with style. The man loved golf, was a long standing member of his club and gave to the United Jewish Appeal. He never missed a television football game and enjoyed watching them with family. In all honesty, I was appalled. I started asking people in my classes to write two obituaries for themselves. The first one was what they thought the rabbi would say about them. The second was what they would like to dream about accomplishing and what the rabbi would say about them if they A Special Parenting Opportunity fulfilled their dreams. Most everyone discovered they had strayed very far from their dreams. They would not be remembered for greatness. They would end up being remembered for the games they played and for leaving a pile of things to their children. Is this a legacy? Tu Bishevat is coming. It is the holiday of trees. It reminds us of season cycles, productivity, and mostly — of doing something for the next generation This Tu Bishevat, will we be from those who only eat from the trees or will we be the planters of trees? What if all the readers of this article would sit down and make a list of their spiritual possessions that will be left to their children. Then what if they would set goals for themselves to be attained before death: — I want to understand the purpose of being Jewish and teach it to my children. — I want to see the beauty in all people, and pass this sensitivity on to my children. — I want to be totally committed to Judaism and Israel and pass this sense of loyalty to my children. — I want to be honest, humble and wise, and to convey these attributes to my children ... Could you imagine a Jewish people who thought and acted like this? This Tu Bishevat, let's think not only of the physical wills we can plant for our children, but the ethical ones as well. ❑ Rabbi Tolwin is education director of Aish HaTorah/Aleynu, the partnership for adult Jewish education. Bishevat Scrambler Instructions: Correctly unscramble the words below and match the letters with the corresponding numbers to find the answers. HINT: Each puzzle has the word "tree" in the answer. SCRAMBLED TREES 1. KOA 2. ACDRE 3. LL011,W 4. CYRPSSE 5. EVLOI 6. GET 7. AIMP 8. MEALP 9. EMRYTL 5 10 9 7 4 10. RIF 6 THE TORAH IS CALLED THE 1 2 3 4 _Q. 7 8 9 10 5 6 Continued from Page L-1 and ultimately leave their families and seeds and die. This is not to suggest that every Tu Bishevat becomes an opportunity to discuss death and dying, but rather, that if it is appropriate, and timely, that we eel/Midi/ THE JEWISH NEWS 27676 Franklin Road Southfield, Michigan 48034 February 2, 1990 Associate Publisher Arthur M. Horwitz Jewish Experiences for Families Adviser Harlene W. Appelman L 2 - FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 2, 1990 don't shy away from having this discussion with our children. The story of Honi also offers a special opportunity: at the story's close, Honi is asked why he, such an old man, is planting saplings. He surely won't live long enough to taste the fruit of the trees he is planting. Honi replies that he is not planting for himself but for his children, so that they may enjoy the fruit of these trees. SCRAMBLED FRUIT 1. PAM, 2. 6 SYTRABRREW 3. SRINAI 4. TADE 5. TUNLAW 16 2 4 17 14 10 1 3 6. GENRAO 7. ACIOPRT 8. GIF 5 8 9 Parenting Points About Tu Bishevat 1. Everything on earth has a life cycle. 2. Living things go through changes. 3. Living things have ways of helping the next generation and learning part of themselves for the next generation. ❑ 9. RYREHC 10. MATEMPEGRA 11 15 12 13 ANOTHER NAME FOR TU B'SHEVAT 1 2 3 PUZZLE BY JUDY STL13ERG LOEBL 8 9 AAAAA 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 4 5 6 7 ta. IA AANIAili 4 A, Anittp, ittvv\piv AvvIT,NAA.A.N"AAPV Answers On Page L-8