Cherries Jubilee
At the elegant wedding, dessert is
flaming cherries jubilee. Guests are
served a dish of vanilla ice cream, then
waiters circle the table ladeling the
flaming cherries jubilee sauce over the
ice cream. The sauce is in tureens
placed on decorative silver trays; the
trays are placed on carts, which are
rolled from table to table. But the
tureens are heavy, and hot, and one
of the carts tilts, spilling the tray and
sauce-filled tureen onto the carpet and
nearby dance floor.
The dancers scatter before the lava
flow of flaming sauce. The flames are
quickly put out and the waiters do
their best to mop up the spilt sauce.
Since they only have the mono-
grammed cocktail napkins to work
with, they don't do a very good job.
For the rest of the evening, the dance
floor is very sticky and as couples
dance, there are constant little "pop"
sounds whenever someone steps on
a cherry.
Waiting At The Altar
Cash Bar
After months of preparation, the
wedding day arrives. All is in readiness
— the florist has done a splendid job
decorating the sanctuary and the hall
where the dinner will be held, the
caterer is in the kitchen preparing the
food, the musicians are tuning their
instruments, the guests are seated and
waiting for the ceremony to start.
The bridal party is also ready,
dressed in their gowns and tuxes and
holding their bouquets and bou-
tonnierres. Only two people are not
present — the groom and his widowed
mother. Increasingly frantic phone
calls to their home produce no result.
Eventually, the realization dawns that
they are not going to show up at all.
An announcement is made; the guests
depart; the caterer wraps up the food
and presents it to the bride's family,
along with his bill.
The next day, the mother of the
groom calls the bride's family, convey-
ing a message from her son that he
has decided he isn't really in love and
he didn't want to get married after all.
Further investigation by the bride's
family reveals that this man had done
the same thing — not showing up at
the last minute — once before to
another woman.
A young couple attends a friend's
wedding. After the ceremony, there is
a reception where hors d'oeuvres are
being served and a bar is set up. The
couple goes up to the bar and orders
drinks. As the waiter serves their
drinks, he tells them how much they
cost. What, say the couple, there's a
charge for the drinks? Oh yes, replies
the bartender, this is a cash bar. The
couple, who came without expecting
to have to spend money, do not have
enough cash to pay for the drinks,
which they return to the bartender.
The Insistent Photographer
The mother and father of the bride
are divorced, and it wasn't an amia-
cable divorce, either. In fact, they are
barely on speaking terms. But no one
has informed the photographer so he
keeps posing them together in shots
— trying to get them to hold hands
or gaze fondly at each other. Finally,
after several frustrated attempts to
have the couple show some sign of af-
fection for each other, someone in the
family thinks to tell the photographer
of the actual situation. I
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The Jewish News 27