SINGLE LIFE
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2 500
Young dynamic Jewish leaders
will be in Washington, D.C.
March 11-13, 1990
for the United Jewish Appeal's
7th National Young Leadership Conference
"Uniting the Generations"
Celebrate Purim, with
new friends at a gala ball
Singlehood means time to use as you see fit.
A Single's Manifesto:
It's A Mixed Blessing
Dialogue with experts on Jewish
values, continuity, and family
life in the coming decade
Photos: Robert A. Cumin
ELSIE BLISS
Participate in
discussions with
leading Senators,
Congressmen,
Administration
officials and
Israeli diplomats
Roselyn K. Blanck
Betsy Snider Heuer
Dr. Owen Z. Perlman
Detroit Chairmen
Detach here and mail to: Young Leadership Washington Conference, 163 Madison Ave., Detroit MI 48226-2180
Yes, I'm interested in the UJA 7th National Young Leadership Conference.
Please send me further information.
Name
Address
City
State
Telephone (H)
ZIP
(B)
SPACE IS LIMITED
REGISTER EARLY AND SAVE
SINGLES (All Ages)
IIAVDALAII SERVICE AT
CONGREGATION B'NAI ISRAEL
8:00 P.M.
Saturday, November 18, 1989
Led by: Rabbi Sherman P. Kirshner
Co sponsored by:
Congregation B'nai Israel and
the Jewish Community Center
bruce m. weiss
Custom Jewelry
26325 Twelve Mile Rd.
In the Mayfair Shops
At Northwestern Hwy.
Monday-Saturday 10-5:30
Thursday 10-8:30
353-1424
-
Following the Service, spice up Havdalah
with captivating storyteller Corinne
Stavish, refreshments and a sing-a-long.
RSVP 661-2924 or 661-1000, Ext. 347
98
FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 10, 1989
50% OFF
MADE TO MEASURE
DRAPERI ES
YOU MEASURE, VIANG SASE!
NOW OPEN
IN MADISON HEIGHTS
MADISON PLACE - 589-3032
also ORCHARD PLACE
855-0122
Special to The Jewish News
am asked The Question
by my mother's friends at
every wedding reception.
Also at every party and
family gathering by well-
meaning relatives — and
sometimes by strangers.
If it were not for The Ques-
tion and my creative
response, some of the people
I meet wouldn't find
anything to say to me.
But the time The Question
hurts most is when an eli-
gible man I've just met offers
it aloud, as in, "Gee, it's a
wonder you aren't married."
Am I supposed to admit
that I am insecure, yet
demanding? That no one I
have ever met who was
available was sufficiently
desirable to justify giving up
my precious independence?
That no matter how I sear-
ched, while appearing not to
be searching, there has not
been anyone who met my
rather rigid list of criteria?
Am I expected to actually
unload this emotional bag-
gage on some poor shnook
who might himself prove to
be truly desirable?
Of course not. Because
then I would frighten him
off.
Speaking for many nice,
attractive, loving and
desirable single people, I'd
like to climb upon my soap-
box and explain a few
things. It may not hold for
all single people, but for
some who have stayed single
for an inordinately long time
I
Being single is quite
respectable. It is a valid way
of life. It is not a tragedy or a
handicap. It is being the
Elsie Bliss is a Washington,
D.C. writer. This article
originally appeared in the
Washington Jewish Week.
boss; the captain of your
ship. I quite like it, even
though I readily admit I fre-
quently miss what married
people have when their mar-
riage is going well, just as
they miss the freedom I have
to decide my own goals and
priorities.
I am sorry to say that
statistics are against their
marriage going well. Mar-
riage in the 20th century is
in trouble, but singlehood is
not in trouble, despite its
bad press. Singlehood has a
lot going for it.
If you took a poll of your
friends and their feelings
about marriage, and if they
responded candidly, you'd
find that, as some brilliant
mind once noted, marriage is
like a besieged fortress:
those who are inside want to
get out and those who are
outside want to get in.
Perhaps The Question
should be put to someone
with matrimonial ties:
"Why is a nice person like
you married?"
Some day I may find a
partner who will allow me to
be me and who will even
respect and admire my need
to be myself. He won't
criticize my liking health
foods or tell me I'm uptight
because I won't go to a nude
beach. He'll think I am fine,
quirks and all, even though I
love sitcoms and hate game
shows and violent movies.
If I am lucky, he will have
the same desire to be himself
and I'll respect and love him
for it. Our two selves may
join and become a couple of
happy individuals. Note, I
did not say we would become
one, but a couple of in-
dividuals. Where did that
myth — that you become
part of another —originate?
Better half, indeed!
Until that happens, no
matter how long it takes —
maybe never — I will not be
categorized as a "JAP,"