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day there is Stars of David.
Stars of David is a national nonprofit
social support network for Jewish adoptive
families. Founded in 1984, Stars of David
grew from one adoptive family to 500
families nationwide in less than three
years. Chapters have been formed in cities
from Connecticut to Oregon, and members
include•Jews of all affiliations, intermarried
couples, single parents, prospective
parents, interracial couples, single parents,
prospective parents, interracial couples
with biological children and grandparents.
While Stars of Davis is not an adoption
agency, everyone who joins agrees to have
his or her name published on the national
list and thus become a resource for other
members.
For more information about Stars of
David, contact Phyllis Nissen or Rabbi
Susan Abramson at Ibmple Shalom
Emeth, 16 Lexington Street, Burlington,
MA 01803, (617) 272-2351.
There is no difference
between naches from
adopted children
and naches from
biological children.
And as adoption becomes an ever more
common phenomenon in the Jewish com-
munity, there will be other resources, like
Chag Sameachl, a children's book that
celebrates the racial and ethnic varieety of
American Jews. On the cover a man wear-
ing kippah and tallit blows a shofar, while
a little Asian girl also holding a shofar,
looks up at him lovingly:
,
New Rites
-There is usually no difference in the way
adoptive parents and birth parents select
names. When American Jews adopt, their
children are commonly named in memory
of family members who have died. Typical-
ly, a child's full Hebrew name includes his
or her parents' names as well, as in David
ben Moshe v'Rivka, David the son of
Moses. and Ruth; or Gila bat Raphael
v 'Leah, or Gila, the daughter of Raphael
and Leah. Sometimes, however, the custom
for adult converts is followed: David ben
Avraham Aveinu v 'Sara Amenu, David the
son of Abraham our father and Sarah our
mother. This "generic" convert's name was
more common in the past, when the
adopted child was likely to be a born Jew.
Since ritual statuses—like that of kohane
and levi— is inherited biologically, the rab-
bis wanted to be certain there would be no
confusion if a child took the last name of
his Cohen or Levinson adoptive parents.
The adoption of a child is a rite of
passage as momentous as a birth and
deserves the same kind of attention and
care we lavish on all joyous life cycle
events. Any and all ceremonies related to
adoption—brit milah, mikvah, naming—
may be the occasion for a meaningful, per-
sonal celebration. Or you might want to
consider a Jewish ceremony that sanctifies
the act of adoption itself.
Since some communities harbor vestiges
of the old belief that adoption is somehow
an embarrassment that should be con-
cealed, your celebration can help lay old
prejudices to rest, showing your family,
friends and community how you feel about
the blessing, joy and opportunity of
holiness that attend the adoption of a
child. A written guide to your ceremony
will help guests follow along and par-
ticipate in the proceedings.
The following ceremony is a model of a
simple, moving Jewish adoption ceremony:
BRIT IMMUTS
Covenant of Adoption for Noah Hernan
Noah is escorted into the room by his
paternal grandmother and given to his
maternal grandmother. The parents ex-
plain the nature of the ceremony and tell
the story of the baby's name. Verses from
Psalm 119 spelling out Noah in Hebrew are
recited in Hebrew and English by family
and friends.
Noah is placed on the knees of his adop-
tive parents, who then take the following
oath.
We solemnly swear, by the One who is
called loving and merciful, that we will
raise this child as our own. We will nurture
him, sustain him, and guide him in the
paths of Torah, in accordance with the
duties incumbent upon Jewish parents.
May God ever be with him. We pray for the
wisdom and strength to help our child,
Noah Hernan, and his brother, Joshua
Simon Luis, become men of integrity and
kindness.
May the One who saved me from all evil
bless these lads, and let them be called by
our name and the names of our ancestors
and may they multiply throughout the
land.
For a. girl, you might substitute the
following:
Be blessed of the Lord, daughter! And
now, daughter, have no fear, I will do in
your behal whatever you ask, for you will
be a fine woman. (Ruth 3:10-11)
The blessing of peace is given, followed
by the shehehiyanu, recited by all.
Noah's grandfather and a friend give the
child blessings from family and
community.
The company joins in the singing of
Yona matz'a, which refers to Noah's dove,
who found peace on the Sabbath.
Kiddush is recited, and brunch served.
Words of Torah from an honored friend are
offered before the singing of birkat
hamazon, the blessing after meals. 111
From The Jewish Baby Book by Anita Dia-
mant. Copyright ©1988 by Anita Diamant.
Reprinted by permission of Summit Books.
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