Although it is the marrying couple's
event, the bride and groom should be
sensitive to the feelings of their
children and not force them into
public rejoicing if they sense it is
inappropriate for the child.
On the subject of inappropriate:
Many brides and grooms invite their
ex-spouses to their second weddings
in an effort to display "we're such good
friends." If they are, indeed, "such
good friends," they should get
together for a nice, long lunch
sometime, rather than clutter up a
wedding party with their past.
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82 BRIDES 1989
Before calling the first caterer or
ordering the exotic nosegay, a couple
should decide how much they want
to spend for their soiree and how they
are going to split said expenses (if they
Lynda, an interior designer, and
her fiance planned an elegant cocktail
party reception for about 40 people
to be hosted in her garden. She
recalls, "The party was expensive —
about $5,000. We could have taken
a great vacation or bought something
for our home, but it was important to
ratify the marriage with a statement,
with people we wanted in attendance
rather than to just slink off
somewhere. It was absolutely
gorgeous, a night we will never forget.
Since we both have our own
resources, we split the expenses right
down the middle."
In Lynda's case, negotiating
wedding expenses proved no
problem. But often, when a man
assumes that "her parents will take
care of everything' while his fiancee
is thinking, "he'll handle the costs,"
a divorce may be the immediate result
of a second marriage.
What To Wear?
"Most brides look better the
second time around," observes one
bridal shop owner. "This is because
they plan their 'look' more carefully;
they're more self-assured. Before the
event, they'll have a dry run on the