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September 25, 1987 - Image 13

Resource type:
Text
Publication:
The Detroit Jewish News, 1987-09-25

Disclaimer: Computer generated plain text may have errors. Read more about this.

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interior designer

meat is never knowing what
it feels like to be a good, car-
ing person!'
There is, Rabbi Kushner
feels, a second mistake that
society makes. "We set the
peak of life at age 28 and
everything else goes down
hill. It is not true that life
becomes less enjoyable as we
get older. It should be just the
opposite.
"Older peple are wiser and
more interesting. We have to
change from looking at life as
a resource we use up. We must
learn to look at life as an ac-
cumulation of treasure. Every
year we live adds more, not
less.
"Except for being able to
run fast and drink coffee at
night, there is no advantage
to being young. Who wants all
the worries of being 18 again?
Don't be afraid of growing old.
Life becomes richer the fur-
ther you get into it."
Rabbi Kushner added that
middle age is an attitude
towards time that can occur
at any age. "When you realize
you won't be around forever
and you realize you can't
waste time, you have turned
a corner in your life.
"Psychotherapist Carl Jung
suggests when you get to that
place in your life you should
go back and fill in all the
places you left blank when
you were growing up. When
you get to the mid-point in
your life, don't keep on doing
what you already know how
to do well. Reach for
wholeness and completeness!"
To do this, Rabbi Kushner
suggests men become less
competitive and develop their
nurturing sides. "One of the
epidemics of our society is
that for the most part, men
don't have friends. They have
to have a purpose to see other
men. They are not taught
how to open themselves up
and share themselves with
other men. They are taught to
be rivals. They do not talk
about their fears!'
He suggests that women
need to be assertive and stand
up for themselves. "If a
woman goes from being a
child to being someone's wife
and someone's mother
without making time for
herself, it is time for her to
grow and do new things!'
"The key to lasting hap-
piness comes from understan-
ding what makes life mean-
ingful. "When you learn to
connect with other people,
when you get over the fear of
pain so you can be open to
feeling joy and love, then you
will learn what it really
means to live.
"You won't have to ask,
`Where is the reward in all I
am doing?' Life itself becomes
the reward!"

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THE DETROIT JEWISH NEWS

13

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