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OPEN MON.-SAT. 10-9 SUN. 12-5 11 MILE & EVERGREEN OPEN MON.-SAT. 10-7 SUN. 12 - 5 855-0122 569-0533 Friday, February 13, 1987 THE DETROIT JEWISH NEWS PERSONAL SERVICE, PLENTIFUL SAVINGS! are never deferred. A defer- ral is a prelude to a cancellation, even though the couple in question may not know it. Israel's Second Law: It will cost at least 50 percent more than you expect, whatever you expect. Israel's Third Law: A successful wedding is one at which you lose no more than two friends and three relatives. Israel's Fourth Law: A wedding without steady and clear direction is a vacuum that will be filled immediately by the florist, the band leader, the caterer, Aunt Sarah or the rabbi. There is nothing wrong with that happening, but it will happen better if you decide in advance whose guidance is most likely to meet your needs. Israel's Fifth and Most Important Law of Weddings: The things that go wrong at a wedding are what make it truly memorable. The things that go right evaporate into the past and become part of every other wedding that ever happened. But if the bride trips on her way down the aisle and falls flat on her face, if the groom gets caught in traf- fic and arrives an hour and a half late, if the ring gets lost or the caterer serves ptomaine, everyone will remember the wedding warmly and chuckle about it for years. The disaster will have made the wed- ding, perhaps in several ways. It may be a statistical ac- cident but every one of the memorable weddings I have described here is still an in- tact marriage. Alas, that is something I cannot say about all the less eventful weddings in which I have participated. The Talmud recounts that in the middle of a wedding, Mar, the son of Ravinah, picked up an valuable cup and smashed it to bits. He certainly must have gotten every- one's attention because the incident caused that wed- ding to be remembered for about 2,000 years. The reverberations from the breaking of that cup are heard when the glass is broken at every Jewish wedding, the broken glass that suggests that nothing is perfect, that every event and every moment is flawed, even those we treasure the most. Broken shards are among the givens of our lives. lb forget that is to burden our legitimate aspirations with the pain of unnecessary disappointment. It is an illusion to believe that you can be completely in control of anything in this world. So, as you plan your wedding, try to make it nice but don't try too hard. It isn't going to be perfect in any case. But even if you could create an extraordinary event that would be absolutely perfect, it would be so without character that no one would ever remember it. Relax, enjoy and look for- ward with eager anticipa- tion to the surprise mis- haps that will make your wedding quite special and memorable. As for me, I am marrying off my first child this spring. I wonder what will go wrong. ■ Singles In Israel There are now in Israel I approximately 400,000 single men and women in the age bracket 25 to 35, according to a report that appeared in the afternoon daily Yediot Ahronot. The newspaper describes this as a very painful problem since these are people at an ideal age to marry and have a family life. In that connection, the newspaper points out that there is a significant num- ber of "loners" (no figure is given). In the age bracket 35 to 40, there exists a state of affairs even more critical than the one pre- viously described. The newspaper does not exclude the possibility that these groups may account for as much as 30 to 35 percent of the total adult popula- tion of the country. Bridesmaids Y our bridesmaids' dresses add color to your wed- ding and also make a state- ment about your personal style. The dresses you choose are nearly as impor- tant as the bridal gown. Similar silhouettes for both brides' and maids' dresses — similar fabrica- tion — look best. The maids' dresses will be the pivotal color for ushers, flowers and mothers' dresses. Try to include all your at- tendants in the decision but remember — it's dif- ficult to make everyone happy. And do pay attention to the price of the brides- maids' dresses. It is customary for attendants to pay for their own dresses, accessories, transportation and lodging.