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July 18, 1986 - Image 27

Resource type:
Text
Publication:
The Detroit Jewish News, 1986-07-18

Disclaimer: Computer generated plain text may have errors. Read more about this.

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ENTERTAINMENT?
INVITATIONS?
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Hattie Schwartz
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• This city's largest cellular dealer is offering four free hours of
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service at Ram's office.

—1 • Ram offers four free hours of air time to any Ameritech
cellular customer that switches to Ram.
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(Must bring in current copy of Ameritech bill.)



Cr

197'1

haps at a more elemental
level, it had something to do
with our own immortality:
the two of us replacing
ourselves in the world with
two new lives. But what I
was actually feeling then, and
for the first time at age 26,
was a sense of the broad
sweep of Jewish history and
my oneness with it.
Like any peak experience,
once over, life goes back to
normal. But you are never
quite the same again. You re-
main more -intimately and
lovingly connected to the
Jewish people.
Finally, there is one other
connection—parent as Jew—
that is unique to this genera-
tion. After the Holocaust,
each Jewish child is not only
a statement of new life, but a
symbol of the life-affirming
forces within us in the face of
unspeakable degradation and
death. Clearly the logical
thing for the Jewish people to
have done after encountering
such horror would have been
to fold up their tents and
quietly fade back into his-
tory—and certainly not to
have Jewish children. But life
and logic, to our great for-
tune, are not always con-
sonant.
No Jewish child is con-
ceived to "make up" for the
Holocaust. That would be
crude to state and burden-
some for both parent and
child to carry. Nevertheless,
whether a conscious factor or
not, the Holocaust has in-
creased the urgency to create,

—1

• Ram also offers four free hours of air time to any Ram
customer who sends us a friend that we sell a phone to and
place on Rams service.

expand and treasure Jewish
life. To be a Jewish parent
after the Holocaust is to
make a large series of claims
about Jewish identity, hope,
covenant, faith and commun-
ity. Without uttering a single
word.

Children and Career

Children can delay,
diminish, demolish career, or
have no impact whatsoever.
It largely depends on what
one wants. Particularly for
women in these times, there
are many choices.
But the matter is not so
simple .. .
I consider myself a "trans-
ition woman." By that I
mean a woman whose ideas
about self were shaped long
before the women's move-
ment refashioned our self-
perceptions. But transition
also means being caught be-
tween two value systems, one
that defined women largely in
homemaking and mothering
roles, the other—in terms of
career. Those particular
facts—of timing and of
cultural dissonance—explain
in part the longstanding am-
bivalences I have felt on this
issue, a string of conflicts,
tensions, and bipolar pulls
that men never had, and that
women of the new generation
have hardly at all.
Proof of my ambivalences?
In 30 seconds flat I can be
persuaded that careers and
motherhood do/do not con-
flict. Proof two?—the knot in

the pit of my stomach. I feel
it much less now, but I
remember it well. Sitting in
the office at 4:15, knowing
that the school bus is just
pulling up to the corner and
not I, but the housekeeper, is
there to meet them; or sitting
in the park with five adorable
children, yet somehow feeling
that life (read: professional) is
passing me by.
Today I no longer sit in the
park or meet the school bus,
but the tensions are not
altogether gone: three hours
for writing, or three hours for
accompanying a 17-year-old
on a first visit to the der-
matologist for a few pimples
that I know will go away on
their own, but about which I
could not, in kindness, con-
vince a distressed teenager.
(The teenager goes alone; I
stay, but don't write a line.)
Or an afternoon to prepare
properly for a lecture; or the
same afternoon to shop—
"Please, not the last minute,
Ema"—for a graduation
dress. (I go.) Do fathers feel
as if they are missing some-
thing when their children in-
vite them along, but father is
too busy?
And yet, would I want it to
be any different? I think not,
for surely I could have had it
another way. Clearly, then, I
desired the new options for
women, but was unwilling to
relinquish the old.
Let me start by acknowl-
edging the unyielding con-
straints: a) there is only so
much time in one day and so

CC

—J

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Unit 28 • 8 Mile W. of Telegraph
Mon. to Sat. 9 to 5

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UTICA

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Across From Lakeside Mall
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PONTIAC

137 S. TELEGRAPH
In Rainbow Plaza
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27

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