THE DETROIT JEWISH NEWS
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Family Run Pharmacy
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WALDRAKE
PHARMACY
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175 count
2 ply
reg. $1.09
now 89*
$
cc
-eel so rnuc_h c\ o sec to cry ?tzr e-rTi
since -+V ■ ey moved 2,000 miles awai.
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DELSEY
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I -bathroom tissue 1
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4 rolls 2 ply
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89 c l 1
reg. $1.15 now
limit 3 exp. 11-30-85
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KEN JACOBS, R.Ph.
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limit 3
exp. 11-30-85
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is..........sommvunamelm
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LIGHT SIDE
Friday, November 8, 1985 3
• FREE DELIVERY
• SENIOR CITIZEN DISCOUNT
$2.00
on your next
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MI Ili
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5548 Drake Rd.
West Bloomfield
a
OFF
HI-DRI
towels
reg. 63' now 49c
(corner of Walnut Lake &
1 mile north of J.C.C.)
661-0774
Mon.-Sat. 9 a.m.-8 p.m.
limit exp. 11-30-85
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IMI1 EMI UM 11111111 MN NMI I= OS
How Crazy Is
New York City?
Among the more intriguing
items in the newspapers re-
cently was a report that New
York City, faced with a shortage
of teachers for its public schools,
was recruiting teachers in such
exotic spots as Israel, Puerto
Rico, and Spain. I was very puz-
zled by this report. With "eight
million unemployed persons in
this country, and with many of
the nation's taxis being driven
by PhD's unable to find work in
their academic fields, was it
really necessary for New York
City to search for teachers
abroad?
•
Now, that's the way I look at
the situation. I realize, however,
that I don't know much about
either urban or world affairs,
and so my opinion doesn't count
for much. In order to be able to
•
form a more informed opinion, I
•
• - decided to look into the minds of
some prominent observers of the
urban and world scenes, to learn
what they think of New York
City's actions. This is what I
came up with:
Ed Koch: When I look at the
characters attending the City's
schools these days, I think it
might be a better idea to ship
the brats overseas for their edu-
cation, instead of bringing the
teachers here. On the other
hand, those foreign teachers
probably don't shower as often
as Americans do, and that will
be good for the City's water
shortage.
Fidel Castro: If New York
City needs Spanish-speaking
teachers, I can send over
thousands more of the inmates
of my mental asylums. Everyone
knows you have to be crazy to
teach in New York, anyway.
Gerald Ford: Far be it for me
to tell New York City where to
go — to look for teachers, that
is.
Shimon Peres: If New York
City's educators are seeking
Spanish-speaking teachers, I
\=
don't know why they're looking
in my country. Either they're
meshugah — you know, loco —
or they must think my last
name ends in a "Z." Seriously,
though, you know that we have
hundreds of terrorists in our
jails, whom we intend to release
soon. Well, I told them that they
could go free immediately if
they would go to New York and
teach, but they refused. They
said they were afraid to go
there.
Eddie Steinberg
...rice barrier's
rush the r
You can
PIZ CUTLASS CIERA
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Mr. Steinberg lives in Teaneck, New Jer-
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Arafat Offers
Diplomacy
Yassir Arafat announced at a
crowded press conference in
Amman today that the PLO has
just opened an international dip-
lomacy school. The school hopes
to train world leaders in the art
of how to win friends and gain ,
influence by following Arafat's
easy-to-learn one basic step to
success: look, dress and speak in
a manner so revolting that your
audience won't pay attention to
the fact that you're lying.
As proof, Arafat noted with
glee that due to his slovenly ap-
pearance and butchered English
during recent interviews on
American television, "no one
noticed that while I maintained
that the American hostage on
the ship'didn't die at all, or that
he died of fright, the truth was
that he died from PLO bullets.
We fooled everyone."
Arafat said that the main in-
centive for students of his dip-
lomacy school to do well is that
if they fail they will be sent on
suicide missions. And if they do
well? he was asked. "They, too,
will be ssent on suicide mis-
sions," smiled the suave ter-
rorist.
G.R.
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"