42 Friday, March 8, 1985 PURIM THE DETROIT JEWISH NEWS — 0 Camel Lot Camel Local 421 walked off the job in the Sahara this week complaining of poor working conditions. "We go for days without food and water" com- plained one of the strikers. A representative for management, however, was confident that the present negotiations would quickly resolve the camels' grievances stating, "We are almost over the hump." r Sending Knesset through the woof. Rin Tin Tehiya Best fishes from the Veep. Where's The Fish? Vice President George Bush gave a demonstration in "Voo- doo Cooking" at the White House yesterday, vowing he could "do to the economy what I've done to this fish — cut off the excess." Bush later denied that he had told reporters be- fore the demonstration he was going to "kick a little fish." Camels on strike. Knesset Seeks To Define 'Jerk' Jerusalem — The Knesset was embroiled in yet another nasty ard potentially explosive debate this week as it sought to define the controversial ques- tion: Who Is A Jerk. While many extremists in Is- rael feel it is essential that the issue be resolved once and for all, millions of Diaspora Jews are fearful of the consequences and have threatened to c••t off research funding for kosher cheeseburgers unless the issue is dropped. Orthodox rabbis maintain that a jerk, according to tradi- tion, is the offspring of a schle- miel and schlemazel; Conserva- tive and Reform Jews are seek- ing to re-define the word to in- Jerusalem — Israel's newest Knesset member said this week that he is ready to negotiate for peace with the Palestinians, provided certain conditions are met. "If they would just toss me a bone," MK Chaim Benjamin said diplomatically, "I would be more than willing to come to the table." Benjamin, who answers to the nickname "Benji" and was chosen last month in a spe- cial election to replace retiring Tehiya Party MK Geula Cohen. In an exclusive interview with The Jewish News, Benji said that while he would not go "beg- ging" the Arabs for peace, "if they scratch our fleas, we should be willing to scratch theirs." A staunch believer in the art of compromise, the new MK feels it's time for Israel and her long- time enemies to make amends. "It seems like it has been a dog's age since anything posi- tive came out of the Middle East," Benji said. The newest MK has a solid background in politics, serving a dozen years on a special "watchdog committee" headed up by former Israeli President Yitzhak Navon. Before that, he worked for MK Pinhas Gold- stein, who has said that the new MK is his "best friend." Benji was at the center of a controversy two summers ago, when he told a Jerusalem Post reporter "(Menaham) Begin must have been in heat when he ordered the Lebanon invasion." See-No Evil, Kemosabee Eyebrow Raising Implants Former Israeli Defense Min- ister Moshe Arens rehearses his role as "Tantee" in the forth- coming film, "See No Evil Kemosabee." In the film, Arens protrays Surgeons at the Humana In- stitute labored for hours last week to equip this man with ar- tificial eyebrows. The greatest obstacle they has to overcome during the operation, doctors said, was the patient's tenden- cy to reject the implants. Final- ly, they hit on the idea of tak- ing their subject by surprise and attaching the hair when he wasn't looking. While the sur- gery was a success, physicians say that they won't know for another year whether their pa- tient will ever walk again. Knesset members stand for 'jerk' roll-call vote. dude the children of modern- day nerds. Government officials, fearful of a divisive vote that may top- ple the always-fragile coalition, High Tech Come To Poland are desperately seeking a com- promise. One ingenius proposal was to avoid a definition alto- gether and simply state: "Jerk: See Meir Kahane." In Search Of The latest in British heavy machinery arrived this week in Warsaw, and industry experts immediately assumed that it was the grapefruit squeezer they has ordered from Har- rod's. A general mobilization order was issued and for several hours the city teemed with re- sidents rushing into the streets to roll their fruit into the path of the machine. The gutters ran yellow for hours. tr Fruit masher in action. Leonard Nimoy, host of TV's popular "In Search Of" pro- gram, was in Detroit this week seeking the perfect haman- taschen. Nimoy, who prefers the cook- ie dough confection over the cake dough treat, visited Mertz's, Zeman's, Star, Modern and the Miami Bake Shoppes. After tasting nearly a dozen of the high calorie treats, Nim- oy exclaimed, "Sure these are great, but nothing like Chekov used to bring to the bridge of the Enterprise. 4 6 0 A td Arens views acting role. the faithful Indian guide who joins the Loan Arranger in a crusade to seek out unpaid pledges to the Detroit Allied Jewish Campaign. Eyebrow patient recuperating.