THE DETROIT JEWISH NEWS SPOOF A dinner sponsored by the New York Subway Riders Association will be held in honor of Bernard Goetz as a "Token" of our Appreciation Time: Midnight Place: Last car of the "D" Train Shi'ite-busters in Lebanon. Shi'ites Hit The Fan Israeli commandoes in Leba- non, including a new Ethiopian Jewish recruit, display the new successor to the famous Uzi submachine gun, the Uzi Flooz- ey, used to destroy a whole Shi'ite load of Muslim terror- ists. AMAZING GRACE The Orthodox Day Schools is proud to sponsor a new and unique com- petition in which youngsters will be re- quired to do 50 push- ups while reciting the Grace After Meals. It will be known as Shul House Rock Miami Weiss The all-new Israeli Chassidic Song Festival was picketed by some members of the local Or- thodox community who charged that it has become too secular and show biz-oriented. But a spokesman for the Song Festi- val group defended their rendi- tion of "Shul House Rock" (shown above) as "a loving blend of Eastern Europe and Nashville." The Song Festival theme this year is "The Best Little Talmud Torah in Tel Aviv." yitramotomor Universe Studios reopened production this week on a 40- year-old cops-and-robbers TV series called "Miami Weiss." Shooting on the pioneer series — one of the first ever made in anticipation of television — was The Power Bench Contest Friday, March 8, 1985 41 KAT Z SUPERB TAILORING BY SOL KATZ BASED ON LESSONS SHOVED DOWN HIS THROAT BY HYMIE KATZ PERFORMANCES DAILY, EXCEPT SHABBOS, OF COURSE Announcing a unique merger Clothes Friends of West Bloomfield and Bornstein's Hebrew Bookstore have joined forces to become BORNFRIEND1 offering the latest in Traditional Jewish fashions WEISS SPACE BURIAL Personalized stopped when Maria Ouspens- kaya, who played a female pri- vate detective opposite Oscar Homolka in the 1940s show, squinted herself to death during filming on location just after World War II. The new series, which will star screen newcomers Melba Morris and Biff Grolen, is based on the premise that a flinty but kindhearted police captain needs the help of a yenta to solve crime among the elderly Jewish retirees of Miami. Jeans for Moses? 'Hymie A River' Rev. Louis Fairgame stunned his followers when he announced that he is giving up his pulpit to launch a singing career. In honor of another-former preach- er who became a rock and roll idol, Fairgame will go by the name Little Louis. His first appearance will be at the annual convention of the Jewish Forgive and Forget As- sociation where he is scheduled to sing "Devil With The Blue Mezuzah" and "Long Tall Hymie." Preacher turned singer' only $3995 per person Why spend eternity with strangers? Let EL Ash put your ASHES INTO ORBIT with just twelve of your friends, enemies of loved ones. (Sorry, no pets.) Exclusive EL ASH space burials feature: Pullet, medium, large, jumbo or mumbo-jumbo sized urns. First class, tourist, smoking and non-smoking sections. Your choice of PERPETUAL ORBIT over the Red Sea, Dead Sea, (Soviet air space excluded.) or Brighton Beach I Sott-as-a-kiss nuclear powered lift-off for minimal ash disturbance. TO RESERVE YOUR PLACE IN SPACE call Grand Opening Special From Paris, via Jerusalem The Fringe Benefit The newest in designer tzitzis 321-ZOOM "EL ASH—Our prices are out of this world!" (* Price based on 3.5 gram total ash weight) Call for appointment