12
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LIGHT SIDE
Seeing the lighter side
of the Israeli elections
BY CARL ALPERT
Special to The Jewish News
Haifa — The results of Israel's
elections were pretty awful, but
there were some light moments as
well.
Which Paper Do You Read? Ac-
cording to Haaretz: On election
day a young lady in Tiberias
stripped to the waist opposite the
polling station and did a belly
dance, with Labor Party stickers
across her chest. The Likud pro-
tested. According to Iediot
Ahronot: On election day a young
lady in Tiberias stripped to the
waist, and pasted Likud labels on
her nipples. The Labor Party pro-
tested.
Mystery and Explanation. One
of the mysteries in the election re-
sults was the vote for Meir
Kahane in many Arab villages.
For example, Umm El-Fahm, 8
votes for Kahane; Baka Al-
Garbiya, 5 votes; Kafr M'rar, 10;
Beersheba Bedouin precinct, 21.
Who did they think they were vot-
ing for? One explanation: Arabs
deliberately voted for Kahane to
blacken Israel's reputation
abroad.
Father's Instructions. A boy in
Kiryat Motzkin argued with the
precinct election officials that his
father, who is abroad, had
authorized him to vote in his
stead. The boy brought a written
order signed by his father, but the
officials refused to permit the
proxy. "How can I tell my dad I
failed him?" wailed the lad.
It's the Price Not the Politics. In
Mitzpe Ramon, a Likud stron-
ghold three years ago, the Labor
candidate was encouraged. This
year they did not throw tomatoes
at him. He was quickly disil-
lusioned. "Who would throw to-
matoes when they are so expen-
sive," one of the townspeople told
him.
A Hard Day's Work. Long after
the polls had closed, no report had
been received from Tel Aviv pre-
cinct No. 935. Police who were
sent to investigate discovered
that the precinct chairman,
exhausted from his long hours on
duty, had taken the results home
with him and had gone to bed with
them. The totals were quickly re-
covered.
Moshe Kapayr. The hard facts
of political life here: In Israel the
affluent tend to vote for the Left,
and the working class for the
Right.
Prisoners' Rights. A group of
prisoners appealed from jail to the
courts for the right to exercise
their privileges as citizens and to
vote in the elections. The High
Court of Justice ruled there was
something to their request, but
called upon the Knesset to pass
the appropriate legislation cover-
ing such cases. This year, the
court ruled, no vote. A Labor
propagandist nevertheless spread
the report that many prisoners
had actually voted, and the re-
sults, smuggled out of jail, showed
that all the criminals were for the
Likud.
High Tension. The most thril-
ling expectancy was that
Menahem Begin would come out
of retirement, and at the last mo-
ment sound a stirring call to his
followers to vote for the Likud.
Labor prepared a number of al-
ternative courses of reaction. One
of them had former President
Navon appearing on TV, calmly
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welcoming Begin bck to political
life, and then in matter-of-fact
fashion, narrating for him all the
awful things the Likud had done
to the country since Begin had
gone into seclusion. Begin never
appeared, and Navon never made
the speech, which had already
been taped.
Voting by the Clock. In the
Arab village of Deir Hana there
was fear of bloodshed if members
of two feuding clans showed up to
vote simultaneously. It was
agreed that members of one clan
would vote only in the morning,
and the others only in the after-
noon. Peace was maintained. In
the Bedouin precincts in the
Negev, only males voted during
the day; females came out to vote
only in the closing hours.
How Much is a Non-Vote
Worth? The Neturei Karta of
Meah Shearim, who do not recog-
nize the government, carried on a
campaign to urge people not to
vote. According to one report, they
paid fifty shekels to any Jew who
for 24 hours would deposit with
them his Identity Card, without
which he could not vote.
Illiteracy ,a Handicap. The
regulations state that only a
handicapped person may have an
escort go into the polling booth
with him to help. In Kiryat Gat
the precinct chairman ruled that
an illiterate person was "handi-
capped" and could therefore take
another person with him behind
the curtain. An immediate appeal
was launched to the courts, which
ruled in favor of the chairman.
The Camera Never Lies ..
Much. The general level of the
pre-election commercials on TV
was not high, but credibility of
Labor sank to new lows when sev-
eral of their presentations were
"exposed" by the Likud as decep-
tions. For example, the Labor
voice caustically attacked the
Likud government for policies
which were resulting in industry
after industry going to rack and
ruin. The picture showed scene
after scene of twisted, rusted
frameworks, a ruinous sight in-
deed. The next night the Likud
videocast revealed that the Labor
pictures had been shot in the
scrap iron junkyard of the steel
mills.
NEWS
Israel set to export
limes and bananas
Tel Aviv (JTA) — Israeli far-
mers are preparing to export two
new fruits they have now started
harvesting — limes and red
bananas. Although Israel has
long been known for its citrus,
limes are newcomers to the coun-
try, and do not even have a special
name in Hebrew.
Menahem Davidson, chief ag-
ronomist of the Mehadrin Citrus
Company, said last week that
some 60 acres of limes have been
planted in recent years and the
first eight acres are now bearing,
with some 25 acres expected to
bear fruit next year.
(