aumminumememmilimmow _ THE DETROIT JEWISH NEWS Friday, February 10, 1984 11 Setting the Famine Story Straight By DON McEVOY National Conference of Christians and Jews All my early training was that the Bible was true. It was what it meant and it meant what it said. Oh, of course, I also grew up knowing that George and Ira Gershwin has "Sportin' Life" singing "It Ain't Necessarily So," but that kind of skepticism had little effect on me. But now, in 1984, a docu- ment has come to my atten- tion that shatters all my youthful illusions. I have learned that a beautiful story in the book of Genesis is not the real story of what happened. The text has ob- viously been amended. Here's the background. Joseph, the favored son of Jacob, was despised by his jealous brothers. They ganged up on him in the fields one day, at- tacked him, and then sold him to the Midianites who took him to Egypt where he became a slave. Young Joseph had a quite remarkable career in Egypt, making a meteoric rise over the years from slave-boy to a member of Pharoah's cabinet as Secre- tary of the Department of Agriculture. While in that post, he developed an Ever-Normal Granary Project through which grain was stored in years of bumper crops against the possibility of lean years of crop failure and famine. 1' The famine came, but be- cause of Joseph's farsighted administration, Egypt had plenty of grain in reserve. But over in the Sinai Des- ert, Jacob and his family were near starvation. He had no idea, at this time, that the man who was re- sponsible for Egypt's con- tinued prosperity was his long-lost son since the mur- derous older brothers had concocted a story about Joseph's death many years before. - Knowing, nonetheless, that Egypt had foodstuffs, Jacob sent a delegation of his sons to Egypt to plead for help. To make a long story short, Jacob and his family got the grain they needed, and there was a heartwarm- ing reconciliation between father and son. M least, that is what the Bible says. Now the truth of the matter. That happy end- ing was nothing other than a rewrite of history by a bunch of do-gooder, bleeding-heart liberals. What really happened was the delegation from the Sinai was met by a top offi- cial of the Pharoah's gov- ernment, one who worked in the office right next to the top man at the palace. He listened to thier story. Then he called a press con- ference and announced that despite rumors to the con- trary there simply was no documented evidence that anyone was hungry. Of • course, he added, we have all heard anecdotes, but there is no hard evidence. Besides, if anybody is hun- gry it is their own fault. Those who are claiming that they are hungry are just trying to get a free meal. He did, however, have a commission appointed to study the matter. I read this factual account in a Methodist magazine, and I still trust the Methodists. Don't You? Eternity Bracelet Eternity Necklace Diamond Studs Likud Defeated on Debate Motion JERUSALEM (JTA) The Likud-led coalition suf- fered an unexpected defeat last week when the Knesset voted 48-46 in favor of an opposition motion to hold a full-scale debate on the gov- ernment's plans to expand the Jewish quarter in Heb- ron. Deputy Premier David Levy, speaking for the gov- ernment, urged the Knesset to drop the motions. He said plans to extend the Jewish quarter into what is pre- sently an open air vegetable market would be carried out without moving any of IlLe Arab vendors. But Likud MK Dror Seigerman voted with the opposition and former Minister - Without - Portfolio Mordecai Ben- Porat, who has just resigned from the Cabinet, abstained. — A gift she will treasure for- ever and ever ...A gift for Eternity Established 1919 AWARDED CERTIFICATE BY GIA IN GRADING & EVALUATION 30400 Telegraph Rd. Birmingham, MI 48010 Suite 104/134 GEMOLOGIST/DIAMONTOLOGIST "Retail courtesies at Wholesale Prices" Phone: 642-5575 Mon.-Fri. 9-8:30 Sat. 9-6, Sun. 12-5 MODERN'S "SWEE THEART" SPECIALS • sGING FOLD 1