1
rid* October 6, 1918
THE DETROIT JEWISH NEWS .
•
A Mother's Anguish
ONLY YOU CAN STOP IT!
Reprinted from the Pittsburgh Jewish Chronicle
,
Dear Editor:
You probably have a
policy of not accepting
anonymous letters. In my
case, I hope you eill make
an exception. I have al-
most come to terms with
my own sensitivity, but we
are a well-known family in
the greater Pittsburgh
Jewish community, and I
must consider the sen-
sitivities of some of the
other family members.
I am not quite sure why I
am writing this, whether
it is a need to make a pub-
lic confession of a sort, or
to call to account those
whom I hold responsible
for my misery, or to al-
truistically caution others
to avoid my pitfall.
We have a beautiful
daughter, the oldest of our.
four children. She is ev-
erything a parent could
wish for — beautiful,
charming, and bright. At
age 20 we had no reason to
ever question her where-
abouts or the company she
kept.
Several months ago she
announced to us that she
had become a Jewish
Christian, having been
associated with the Jews
for Jesus group for some
time.
At first we did not know
how to react. We are an
average middle class
Jewish family. Our Jewish
identity is probably simi-
lar to the majority of our
peers: Temple member-
ship; interest in Israel;
Sunday school education
for our children; etc.
We have not had any in-
terfaith marriages in our
immediate family, but
with the rather wide-
spread incidence, we prob-
ably would somehoW have
made peace with an in-
termarriage.
To fall in love and in-
termarry is one thing,.but
to reject the family faith is
another. Furthermore, it
seems to us that this was
not a conversion out of
conviction, but an infatua-
tion with a cult which is
probably of the same gen-
eral character as the
Moohies.
To make things so much
worse, our daughter has
begun to preach to our
younger children • who
have always looked up to
her, and is attempting to
sway, them into the Jews
for Jesus group.
Because we put out foot
down and refused to allow
her to influence our
younger children, she has
left home and has gone to
live somewhere with her
group.
When we tried to dis-
suade our daughter, she
•
NAME
ADDRESS
began quoting Scripture to
support her position. She
has become an avid stu-
dent of the Bible.
We thought that there
was surely something
emotionally wrong with
her, and we asked her to
get some counseling. The
psychologist she saw could
find nothing wrong with
her, and told us that many
of today's young people are
searching for philosophies
and something to give
meaning to their lives.
'Some run into the drug
scene, and some find
meaning in various cults.
If what the psychologist
said is true, then we have
been seriously remiss in
not providing our daugh- ,
ter with a meaning for life,
and as a result, we have
lost our child. She tells us
that she never really got to
know religion or the Bible
until she fell in with this
group, and thatothe Sun-
day school classes she.
attended were just an
empty experience.
We are not evading our
responsibilities as par-
ents; and we assume the
guilt for our derelictions.
But after all, we are lay
people who really 'do not
know much, and our own
religious_ training was
scant. We look to our rab-
bis for guidance.
Why do our rabbis allow
a system of teaching whiCh
permits our children to
grow up in virtually total
ignorance of Jewish
knowledge and heritage,
and whicla leaves them
prey to missionaries? How
can our children answer
the arguments which
these missionaries make if
they have no knowledge-
able background? Why did
my daughter's first con-
tact with an intensive
study of the Bible come
from missionaries, and not
from a Jewish educational
system?
When my daughter was
about 10 or 11, she was
befriended by some chil-
dren from a religious
Jewish day school, and
wanted to join them. We
did not favor this, because
we were afraid that we
would be asked to keep
kosher and have other re-
strictions wjiich would
disrupt our life style.
Maybe if we had been less
preoccupied with our own
comforts, we would not
have lost our child.
Our lives have been
dealt a severe.blow with
our child rejecting us and
going off in what we feel is
a destructive course. Per-
haps others cap.be spared.
our misfortune.
-An Embittered Mothei
Jewish community
statistics .. .
DIVORCE 45%
INTERMARRIAGE 40%
DRUGS 55%
CULTS 15%
ILLEGITIMACY 25%
OUR TURN
The challenge of the
"Five Plagues" have
been presented to com-
munity leaders and par-
ents. Jewish community
statistics show 45% di-
vorce, 40% intermar-
riage, 55% -drugs, 15%
cults, 25% illegitimacy.
We asked "What are you
doing about it?" Commu-
nity leaders and parents
replied; then the youth
responded to their par-
ents and to the COMIliti-
nity leaders.
ortions. How cold, how
businesslike is our attitude:
how cooly we examine the
dollar figures in our ledgers
— and proceed to "write-off'
the fate of an entire genera-
tion! Don't we realize that in
twenty year's time these
same children whom we
havd failed to inspire
Jewishly will be the ones
sitting on the board of the
Federation? Who guaran-
tees that they will be in-
terested in perpetuating our
kind of Judaism at-all?
Let us wake up to the
Now it is our turn:
To the Community Lead- facts:
• Who will take responsi-
ers: 1
We say that amount of bility for an entire younger
dollars has been allocated generation abandoned with
for education in this city, little or no Jewish con-
and that .the amount will sciousness?
• Who will take responsi-
doubtless increase in the
years ahead. We are told to bility for the youngsters
be encouraged and hopeful daily lost to our .people
that within 20 years the al- through intermarriage? -
• Who will take responsi-
location will enable every
child to receive a full and bility for the Jewish chil-
substantial Jewish educa- dren daily-40st to drugs in
tion. This is a businesslike the morgues and funeral
approach,, presented in chapels?
• Who will take responsi-
terms of percentages and
increases and funds - AND bility for the youth daily
THAT, DEAR FRIENDS, IS seduced away from our faith
by other religions?
ITSELF THE PROBLEM!
Our children who are now
IN THESE - CIRCUM-
between the ages of six and STANCES THERE IS NO
sixteen need urgent educa- SUCH THING AS "IN-
tional help today. To say SUFFICIENT FUNDS."
that they will receive this MONEY MUST BE
help years hence is to say to TAKEN FROM THE CAP-
dying patient that he will ITAL FUND ITSELF AND
receive his medication to- USED TO LAUNCH
morrow — in accordance EMERGENCY PRO-
with the dictates of the hog- GRAMS OF SUBSTAN-
-pital allocation budget!
TIVE AND SINCERE
The dearth of effective JEWISH EDUCATION
Jewish education is the THROUGHOUT THE
stated problem, but the ENTIRE COMMUNITY,
problem of the community's SO THAT NOT ONE BOY
attitude to this deficiency is OR GIRL IS LEFT OUT!
a crisis of far greater prop-
To the Parents We Say;
a
PHONE
PARENTS UNITED FOR A JEWISH RENAISSANCE
❑
•
The truth may hurt, but it
is time to face the truth. The
comments made in response
to our ad (some of which
were printed a couple of
weeks ago) were comments
of despair: "What could -I
have done?" or, "I gave him
everything I could, what
more could I have given?"
What was not said is that
we have established a dis-
torted foundation in our ap-
proach to Jewish life and we
have tried to maintain the
Jewish tradition while
adhering to that tilted base.
It cannot work It will never
work.
The distorted foundation
is this: That the observant'
lifestyle and dedication to
Torah of our grandparents
and great-grandparents is
untenalale, unworkable, in-
convenient and therefore
unthinkable in this day and
age. Having made this
axiom part and parcel of our
lifestyle, we now seek for
answers to our floundering
youth without giving up on
the axiom — for that would
be quite uncomfortable. So
let us rephrase our answers
in light -of the truth. When
we say, "What more could I
have done?" we really
mean, "What more could I
have done without resign-
ing myself to the irrefutable
evidence that my
grandfather's Jewish lifes-
tyle is the only answer for
myself and my family too."
- Come now, let us be hon-
est with one another?
• We cannot have our'
children learn one
thing in Hebrew School
-*and do the opposite in
our homes.
• We cannot talk about
some of the Ten Com-
mandments and reject
the others.
• We cannot have a home
life that is identical
with that of the gentile
neighbor -- and then
expect :our son or
daughter to have some
sort of mysterious "gut
feeling" against marry-
ing out.
It is time to go back to
basics We live in an age of
science and technology. It is
time to accept the guidance
of empirical scientists who
say the ultimate proof of a
theory _is when it works.
Torah works. Mitzvos work.
Observance of Jewish val-
ues in the home works. This
is no longer a theory of years
ago, a dream of the "Shtetl"
for grandfather and
grandmother. Today, in our
very city, in our very own
neighborhoods are hun-
dreds of people living by the
guidelines of Torah and
Mitzvos. They eat only
kosher food, in the home
and outside. They do not
work on Shabbos. They sit
around the Friday night
table united as a family.—
grandfather, father and
children. The grandparents
need no old age home. They
are a vital and vibrant part-
of the family unit and have
their t wri productive lives
and Torah-study. Divorce,
intermarriage, immorality,
drug involvement, all of
these plagues are virtually
unknown in the Torah-
observant household. Men-
tal and emotional problems
are of minimal, incidence
. . .
LET US NOT BE JEAL-
OUS OF THEM — LET US
JOIN THEM!,
I am concerned, & I am intewsted in receiving guidance &
assistance regarding my own & my child's jewish education.,_
❑ I would like to assist in_this program
23011 Church; Oak Park, Mich. 48231; Phone: 546-1031