Marcia Seligson's 'Eternal Bliss Machine' Is Explained by Her 'Connubial Blintz' Marcia Seligson is a very clever lady. She has com- piled an anthology on wed- dings that exposes the ways of life of many people. Her description of folkways at weddings w i 11 entertain many, may anger more, will embarrass quite a few. She relates the results of what may well be called social research in "The Eter- nal Bliss Machine: America's Way of Wedding," published by Morrow, and her factual- ness is admirable. Very little is left out. The ways and means — and the means include the costs and the extravagances — are ex- amined and exposed with charm and dignity. Yet the expose as a whole may arouse derision from those who object to the splashing and flashing. The Jewish story will at- tract a great deal of atten- tion. There are changes. Some already are turning down the pomp and flourish. But the great show is still in evidence, and in the in- stance of Marcia Seligson's brutally frank description of the amassed food, the clothes and the affluence there may be that embarrassment that has already caused aches and pains by the seekers of greater modesty and lesser boasting and competitiveness for spectacle. "Connubial Blintz" is an apt title for one of the chap- ters in this intriguing book. There are the caterers, the florists, the hilarities — the drinks! — the attitudes of rabbis who differ in the manner in which they submit to what the clients desire. And there is the matter of parents' social success in planning the wedding—BIG! Of course, it needs to be said that what is portrayed as burlesque at some Jewish weddings is not necessarily the rule. Says Marcia Selig- son: "Jews are no different than any other minority cul- ture, in that the gigantic wedding is symbolic of hav- ing succeeded in the com- munity, being the winner, shifting the scales from a long tradition of deprivation to comfortable solvency . . . The wedding is one of the few occasions in life at which Jews feel justified in getting drunk, so it is unrestrainedly, relentlessly gay . . . A band- leader in New York says: 'At a Jewish wedding, if you play soft and pretty back- ground music, the bride's MR. and MRS. MORRIS DORN father storms up and screams: "What's the matter, and FAMILY didn't your men show up'?" These verdicts of author Marcia won't be accepted without challenge by many modern parents and their sophisticated youth. Yet, Marcia gives details, lists some names, recounts ex- And here is some- wishes to extend heartfelt greetings: periences. thing in her book that really to its members and the entire community: :. invites frenzy: "The New Wedding still for a happy, healthy and peaceful New::: needs a recognized official in attendance, and the new Year. clergyman who joins these •.• brides and grooms is likely Morning and Evening Services to be as offbeat as the rituals are held Daily at Our New Location he encourages — or some- ... : times insists upon. He dis- penses with the ecclesiasti- cal rhetoric on which he was weaned and talks from the pulpit as if he were talking on the phone. The Rev. Cecil Williams in San Francisco Best Wishes For A Year of Peace, Health and Happiness To All Our Relatives, Friends and the Entire Jewish Community CONG. BETH TEF11.01::.:: EMANUEL TIKVAH wears a dashiki to weddings; Rabbi Bruce Goldman of New York wears a blue jeans suit. (Goldman has said that weddings held in synagogues turn him off). The Rev. Al Carmines in Manhattan has been quoted as saying that the wedding of a pregnant girl is 'joyous,' and the Rev. B. D. Napier of Stanford University becomes 'increas- ingly uneasy with a wedding ceremony that doesn't speak to us now.' "Perhaps the most crazy- quilted of styles belongs to Rabbi Will Kramer, who could bt Zero Mostel's beard- ed double and who officiates at many of the new Jewish nuptials in Los Angeles. At such ceremonies he wears long robes and a prayer shawl, and his voice is awe some, booming, talmudic. But what comes out of his mouth is jarringly peppered with hip lingo, like 'I feel good vibes for you, Johnny,' which he then translates into Yiddish for the older audi- ence, coming on like a Cat- skills comic. "Sitting in his home, flanked by a vast collection of biblical artifacts, he told me that he believes mar- riages should be arranged as in the old days and that he will not perform a marriage between Jew and Gentile un- less the children will be raised as Jews. But, as I am leaving, his parting words are completely bereft of such traditional sentiment: 'Wed- dings are a high. Anything I can do to help people kick loneliness for friendship turns me on.' "But most clergymen I talked to still prefer the old wedding, agreeing that the traditional wedding is good and appropriate, that it is a fortress against the break--; down of family life. To cre- I ate one's own vows, they say, is to castrate the church. The liturgy as it stands ensures dignity and thus solemnity, and any de- partures save those few in- stituted by the church itself are blasphemous. "Thus the clergy and the brides and grooms fit simi- lar patterns. There are some of both groups who want the New Wedding - and cannot abide the old. But there re- mains a majority that insists on the old." Is the Jewish reader em- barrassed? Does it irritate rabbi, florist, caterer, party- planner — bride and bride- groom and parents? It wouldn't be normal if what she describes and exposes would be accepted without challenge. Yet, there were and there are weddings like those in her connubially blintzed description. It is the American wed- ding generally — among many elements whose folk- ways often irritate, whose traditions for hilarity, some lasting for days, some for an entire week, still claim the right continuity. That sort of extreme eter- nality for the bliss machine may be curtailed, some in- terrupted, by young readers of the–Marcia Seligson story. As a study and expose of amusing and extravagant weddings she has certainly written a splendid social re- port. -P.S. THE DETROIT JEWISH NEWS Friday, Sept. 28, 1973-37 *CONGREGATION IrNAI ISRAEL 143 ONEIDA ROAD, PONTIAC, MICHIGAN Affiliate — United Synagogues of America *HIGH HOLY DAY SEATS SEPT. 26, 27, 28 OCT. 5, 6 *HEBREW SUNDAY SCHOOL *MEMBERSHIPS AVAILABLE MR. EDWARD AVADEWKA Ticket Chairman 681 - 9237 Membership 626 - 2234 Rabbi L. Berman, M. Goldman, President ------- Rabbi leizer Levin Morris Dorn Presiden 24225 Greendield Southfield The Officers and Directors of the MOIES CHETIM ORGANIZATION OF DETROIT wish to extend their best wishes for a happy and prosperous New Year to all Synagogues, Organizations and all of the Detroit and Suburban Jewry for helping to carry out the Mitzva of Moies Chetim so no Jewish family or indi- vidual in our midst shall be denied the necessities for Pesach. MORRIS DORN, MORREY GOULD, ABE KATZMAN, ABE SATOVSKY, MRS. SAMUEL LEVE, MRS. JOSEPH M. MARKEL, BEN WEISMAN, President Vice Pres. Vice Pres. Trea. Vice Pres. Fin. Sec'y. Secy. Secy. - - - — Role of the Jew: Citizen of World By CECIL ROTH In "Great Ages and Ideas of the Jewish People" Not allowed to be a citizen in any land, the Jew became perforce a citizen of the world, and as a citizen of the world he performed an irreplaceable service. For one of his greatest and most characteristic functions throughout history has been his part as an intermediary — not only intellectual, but economic, social, and politi- cal as well. In addition to his role as the Eternal Protestant, he was also the "International Jew"—a title properly of pride not of ob- loquy. He always had the ad- vantage of standing astride more than one civilization. He had personal connections and interests not hemmed in by political borders. He had a realization of lands and cultures lying far distant from those of his own en- vironment. He had access to foreign languages. His kins- folk were scattered in many lands, so that in every coun- try there was some coreli- gionist who could act as his correspondent or his agent. or give him hospitality, or extend him credit. Hebrew could carry him, at a pinch, from one end of the world tr another, and lay open to him the intellectual treasures of every age and every land. THE HEBREW BENEVOLENT SOCIETY (Chesed Shel Emes) Invites GREATER DETROIT JEWRY to participate in a MEMORIAL SERVICE for the Six Million Jews who perished in Europe at the Hands of the Nazis .. . Which will be held on SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 30th, 1:00 P.M. at the HEBREW MEMORIAL PARK (Chesed Shel Emes Cemetery) Gratiot and 14 Mile Road RABBI MILTON ARM CANTOR SHABTAI ACKERMAN of Cong. Beth Achim of Cong. Beth Abraham-Hillel Will participate in these Services Edward Miller, President ; Hyman Lipsitz, Joseph M. Korman, Vice-Presidents; Sam Levine, Cemetery Chairman ; Rabbi Israel I. Rockove, Executive Director ; Nathan Wolok, Assistant Director ; Rabbi Henry L. Goldschlag, Cemetery Admin- istrator ; Harry E. Citrin, Honorary President. ARRANGEMENTS COMMITTEE NATHAN SAMET, CHARIMAN Jacob Bacow, Meyer I. Cooper, Morris Dorn, Leo B. Furst, Harry Laker, Harry Portner, Samuel S. Portner, Nathan P. Rossen and Leo Stein. .