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September 21, 1973 - Image 41

Resource type:
Text
Publication:
The Detroit Jewish News, 1973-09-21

Disclaimer: Computer generated plain text may have errors. Read more about this.

n

!!

Peace 'Less Remote,' Golda Says in Message to Jews on New Year

JERUSALEM (J T A) —
There are signs that peace
in the Middle East is becom-
ing less remote, Premier
Golda Meir said in a New
Year's message to Jews
around the world.
She noted that the cease
fire had been substantially
maintained throughout the
year and that "some of our
neighbors" have realized
"that they have no wars to
win." This realization, Mrs.
Meir stated, "has given rise
to occasional voices in some
Arab capitals recognizing the
futility of a renewed war." ,
Continuing, the premier's

message stated in part: "The stantially maintained is a deterrent strength of the Is-
fact that the cease-fire along direct consequence of two rael defense forces and the
our frontiers has been sub- factors: The ever-growing constantly increasing inner
strength of our national en-
terprise.

S uede

or

Z eaMer?

• Proper Care
• Custom Cleaning

SEE

DeWITT

10612 W. 9 Mile

543-5700

4503 N. Woodward

16. A Jew Likes to Kibitz

By DAVID SCHWARTZ

(Copyright 1973 JTA, Inc.)

What is a Jew? Here is
what everyone should know
about them:
1. Talmud sage, Rab, said,
"He who has no compassion
for any of God's creatures is
not of the seed of Abraham."
However, Jews do not give
charity. They give tzedaka
which means righteousness.
2. Jews are stingy. The
Greeks had hundreds of gods,
the Sumarians thousands,
but a Jew won't have more
than one.
3. Jews are logical, A yes-
hiva bahur was given a pil-
law for his bed but refused
it, reasoning talmudically,
"Whereas everyone knows, it
is hard to sleep on one fea-
ther, how much harder it
must be to sleep on a whole
pillow of them."
A second illustration. One
Jew says to another, "I will
prove to you that you are not
here. You are not in Schnip-
ishok. You will agree to that.

ERIC ROSENOW

S. of 14 Mile

and his

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El-Mars Furs

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Oak Park, Mich. (Across from A & P)

MONDAY THRU FRIDAY 11 A.M. to 4 P.M.

No phone calls please.

Dear Marilyn,

Thank you for the eighteen plus years, thank you

for Beverly and Marla, thank you for everything.

Thank you for the great party.

Dear Natalia and Iry and Donna and Larry and

Bunny and Mickey and Flora and Jerry and Marlene

and Arnie and Ruth and Donnie and Sophie and Leon

and Elaine,

Thank you for seeing me over the hill.

/ate

If you are not in Schnipishok,
you are elsewhere. If you
are elsewhere, you are not
here.
4. A Jew is a poet. If Ru-
ben says apples are the best
fruit, Simon rhymes: apples-
schmapples.
5. A Jew does not have to
study medicine to a doctor.
According to the Talmud,
anyone who visits a sick per-
son, cures the sick man of
1/62 of his illness.
6. Jews don't get drunk.
They "make kidush." The
most famous Jewish bar is
Bar Mitzva.
7. Jews don't go to hell.
They go "in der erd" (in the
earth). Hell has a rather
dubious status in Judaism.
One Talmud sage says there
is such a place, but no one
spends more than a day
there. You scarcely have
time to drop a card to your
friends.
8. T h e favorite Sabbath
dish of Jews is cannon balls.
The good Jew coming home
from the synagogue always
has his kugel (from the Ger-
man for cannon balls).
9. Jews like abbreviations.
The Bible commentator, Reb
Shlomo Yitzchaki is known
by the initials. Rashi. Reb)
Moshe B e n Maimon (Mai-
monides) is Rambam a n d
the name of the former Pre-
sident of Israel, Shazar, is
a combination of the first
letters of Schnuer Zalman.
Rubishoff.
10. Jews used to wish one
another, "May you live to
be 120" Now in Israel, the
120 has been changed to 100,
20 being deducted for the
government tax.
11. There is no generation
gap among Jews. Moses
spoke to the children of
Israel. Prime Minister Esh-
kol, addressing members of
his cabinet, said "kinder-
lakh" (children).
12. Is the Jew a business-
map? Two thousand years
hack, Josephus replying to
Anion admitted that while
the Jews knew about cattle
and farming, they were quite
ignorant about commerce.
Later, however, some Jews
didn't do so bad in business.
13. When people talk ex-
cessively, Jews are always
concerned about their pot-
tery. "Hak nit kein cheinik,"
(don't chop a tea pot) they
say.
14. A Jew's deepest ambi-
tion, it is said, is to be a
violin player. Jews like that
instrument because it is easy
to run away with.
15. All Jews believe in mir-
acles. As Dr. Weizmann put
it, "If a Jew is a realist,
he must believe in miracles."

"Just as these constitute
the basic conditions for mut-
ing the enemies' guns, so too
do they serve as instruments
for the forging of eventual
peace. Nobody can foretell
when that blessed day will
dawn, yet there are factors
operative in our region today
that make its coming less
remote than before."

Pro-Israel Paper
Closes in Sweden

LONDON (JTA)—The de-
mise of the Swedish daily
newspaper, Goteborg's Han-
dels Och Sjofarts-Tidning.
after 141 years of publication
in Goteborg, Sweden's second-
largest city, is a loss to Zion-
ism and Israel.
The paper had a consistent
record of determined opposi-
tion to Nazism, despite Swe-
den's neutrality, and support-
ed Zionism, and later, Israel.
It was highly respected all
over Europe and in America,
and its comments were often
quoted as representing liber-
al and progressive elements.


J. J. CLARKE STUDIO

I "

Friday, Sept. 21, 1973-41

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