THE DETROIT JEWISH NEWS
Friday, August 14, 1970-7
Whatever school you're going back to,
you've got a multiple choice.
Mark your answers in the appropriate square with a
number two leaded pencil. If you wish to change your
answer, erase thoroughly and completely. Mark only
one answer for each question, except in the "TRA-
DITIONAL" category, question number 4. which has
two correct answers. Remember that these tests will be
computer scored, and the computer couldn't care less
whether you pass or fail.
TRADITIONAL
CONTEMPORARY
1. These traditional slacks are...:
❑ A. Tapered so they won't get
caught in your spurs.
• B. Cuffed, enabling them to
catch grass clippings and
other debris.
❑ C. Highly purchasable from any
Osmun's salesman.
❑ D. To be stored in a warm dry
place, out of the reach of
children.
1. These contemporary slacks are...:
❑ A. Baggy around the ankles.
❑ B. Designed so you can take
them off without removing
your shoes.
❑ C. Hanging with a wide selection
of other flared slacks at
Osmun's
❑ D. Not bad.
2." This traditional sweater...:
❑ A. Emits a peculiar odor when
it gets wet.
❑ B. Is neatly folded in a pile
with other size 40 V-neck
sweaters at Osmun's.
❑ C. Means that somewhere there's
a very cold sheep.
❑ D. Is above suspicion.
3. Over all, the sweater, shirt and
slacks...:
❑ A. Make you look like Frankie
Avalon.
❑ B. Are very comfortable.
❑ C. Are not an integral part of
the Jimi Hendrix Experience.
❑ D. Are easily assembled at
Osmun's
h. You would wear a combination like
❑
❑
❑
❑
A. • Immediately after getting a
haircut.
B. To ask Dean of Admissions to
give you one more chance.
C. To revisit 1963.
D. To watch Ozzie and Harriet
reruns.
2. This contemporary sweater...:
❑ A. Has a belt, so it won't
fall off.
❑ B. Sticks to your body when you
don't wear a shirt under it.
❑ C. Like the slacks and shirt,
available at Osmun's.
❑ D. Made of wool taken from some
poor devil in Tasmania.
3. Over all, the sweater, shirt and
slacks...:
❑ A. Make you look like you have a
pretty good idea of what's
going on.
❑ B. Stand for truth, justice and
the American way.
❑ C. Show a little imagination.
D.
Make
you weak and silly.
❑
4. You would wear a combination like
this to...:
❑ A. Walk out in the middle of a
Barbara Streisand movie, which
you couldn't justify going to
in the first place.
❑ B. Hear "The Band".
❑ C. A Laurel and Hardy film festival.
❑ D. Write fan mail to Jerry Vale.
Stores for men and young men
CHEAP
1. These cheap pants are...:
❑ A. Unraveling.
❑ B. Really brand new, but have
been washed 7 times in bleach
to make them look old.
❑ C. Hazardous to your health.
❑ D. Obviously only suited to
proletariat sweathog types.
2. This cheap jacket is...:
❑ A. A constant source of
embarrassment.
❑ B. Government issue.
❑ C. Based on manufacturers
suggested list price.
❑ D. Uniquely unimpressive.
3. Over all, the cheap pants, shirt
and jacket...:
❑ A. Go very well with your
rented bowling shoes.
❑ B. Look like they belong in
Marlboro country.
❑ C. Only A and B of the above are
true.
❑ D. None of these.
4.
You would wear a combination like this
to...:
❑ A. Speak with authority about
urban blight.
❑ B. The boon docks.
❑ C. An Australian tag team
wrestling match.
❑ D. Buy some new clothes at...:
smuis
Open evenings 1119 in the Tel-Twelve Mall (Telegraph and 12 Mile in Southfield). Tech Plaza Center
(12 Mile and Van Dyke in Warren). and Tel-Huron Center (Telegraph and Huron in Pontiac). Our downtown Pontiac
store is open Friday evenings 'til 9. Osmun's Charge. Bank Americard and Master Chargecard.