Purely Commentary 'be Sins of Parents . . . The Protest of Children .:/(- -.eat cartoonist Cra:k111;_ 1111 13111111aa- ..: :10/. portrayec a youngster facing nisi reclining tnt query Wrier. art you goin; tr VLSI: yoar sin: door me"' win nad followed the U e 113 ff:‘ over tat auopuor. :,a sign: Saying plat for Meznigaz. a part of the .-!ra: decision. wil: re aL tria: opt of tat arguments .ttna:;vec2 agains: this state s concurrence with tit nationa: :hat of the mothers. they irrtectec Lc more wnict. wouit impost •Jpoi ten mure time with modern. chimrer. '::rent: and examples tc indicate tnt difference rsarents and cmiaren ant LI• conflicts hetweer. couic Jt quoted ad nauseam. Reco,gnitior. of • 1 • I.:ICI (37 11 rcah r f'ernaps this conflict* - :actor :amity relations it our time Yet that -c miss: caution: us tc realize tna: clifferences be- generations art mevitabit results of cnangin; times anc ui differin; view: uetweer youn and oic anc that two or no: deion; tc out era -but to aL tnousno court tc, mind upor. reading -Fathers iv Hefner Gott Random. House and more especial* afLe• accoun: "Letter to His Fattier' oy Frans Eafka . Scnocker. it "f athers' we find a difference. Natural * . so' The ogler Sam wnc came to this country as a youn; toy. was al. ousiriess seeking tc oenefi: from the advantages pro- valec n' the Americas, environment. The younger Herbert tat author aisc nearing tnt name Gold. had other ideas. otner aspirations Bu: while they conflicted there 15 nc enmity or. a grant scale recorder ir. this splendid work Herber: seems u glory - it. Sam "Fathers' is in essence a work of anulation it i evident throughou: the work that, .the Jewish backgrounc of Berner: is no: oeniec It is clear that it is a Jewish famil7, that t depicted it is not unusua: ir. oth - time to read about Jew's': families. and ofter. novelists. tiescrion4- themselves and their parents. it works that are frequent* admitted tc of autoniograniaical. deride their parents ridicule their background. treat their Jewish heritage with natred. Such at attitude is no: to oe fotmd in Goid - s "Fathers. " Yet there is something lacking. San: wanted tc go to America as a young lad lie was induced by the Rebbe—the matter was left to the Rebbe —to wait until after his Bar Mitzva he did He came here. 1k faced Jeers from non-Jews. he lived through the Hitler era with an indignation against the brutalities. That's as far as it went Herber: grew up. There is mention by the author of the time when he became 12. reached his • 13th birthday. approached /115 14th. not a word about the Covenant! The Jewish reader. presented with a fatally portrait introduced to Jewish fathers (and also the mothers. Sam remained married. Herbert divorced his wife—another element it changes we have witnessed between genera- tions' • must wonder: Sam did not stern from assimilation: was 1: so easy for him completely to abandon the past anc to 'become thoroughly assimilated—so much so that ins son's Jewish education was completely abandoned" Apparently this is possible: it is evident in the Gold story Yet. it is among the isolated cases. It could no: possibb be the rule. or we would know it. And so we have "Fathers" portraying the Golds— the father who assumed this name because he was coming to America and he viewed this land as one where one literally bathes in gold—only to learn quickly that here. as everywhere else, one not only does not immerse in goit but has to sweat for it must meet tip with racketeers if as Sam was in Cleveland. one has to conduct a gro- cery and fruit store in competitions involving control by gangsters , and must accept the difficulties and challenges of numan existence. "Fathers" is a splendidly written story, a fine por- trays: of father-son -relationships. It is because it is so wel. narrated, it has gotten more reviewer's space than many a popular novel. In a sense, that notoriety amazes us Yet. it is so. But when studying the parent-children's pointers.. of far greater oissoificance in posing a challenge u snanging times is Kafka's "Letter to His Father." Surely, r. is much more stirring from a Jewish point of view. 'Letter to His Father — Brief an den Vater' Franz Kafka's book is bilingual. It was written in Novemiser 1919, was given (according to Max Brod) by toe author to his mother for presentation to his father. He had hoped to regain a relationship that was mutually lost in tension and frustration. There is a publisher's note appended to this volume which contains the Kafka letter it its German original and the English translation by Ernst Kaiser and Eithne Wilkins, stating: "He (Frat=1 could not help seeing the gulf between father and son as another moment in the universal predica- ment depicted in so mach of his work. Probably realizing the futility of her son's gesture, the mother did not deliver the letter, but returned it to the author." The original 4S-page, typewritten-by-himself script, averaging 34 lines per page, had corrections in Kafka's own handwriting. To the original the author added two and a half handwritten pages. The German text in the Schocken- published "Brief an den Vater" is presented in its totality. The publisher's note, explaining names in the latter, states that Kocka's three sisters, Ent, Valli and Ottla, perished it the Nazi holocaust. Portions of the Kafka letter are bitter. Almost at the very outset Kafka unburdened himself as follows: 1 have never talked to you frankly: I have never come to you when you were in the synagogue. never visited you at Franzesbad. nor indeed ever shown any family feel- nag I have never 'taken any interest in the business or your other concerns; I left the factory on your hands and walked off: I encouraged Ottla in her obstinacy. and never lifted a linger for vou tnever even got you a theater ticket), while I do everything for my friends. If you sum Father-Son Conflicts as Told and Jewish Challenges by Kafka and Gold us your judgment oS me the result you get is that, al tnougn you hot': charge me with anything downright improper 01" w- ickec with the exception perhaps of my latest marriage plan: you do charge me with coldness, estrangement and ingratitude. And. what is more. you char-gc me with it in such a way as to make i seem no fault. as though I might have been able, with something lire a touching,' or. the steering wheel. to make everything quite different while you aren't in the slightest to blame. tiniest. it IV, for naving been too good to me." This migre sound familiar in many sons-fathera efts. especially Ir. relation to not having taken - any interest the ousiness But there is much more to the story Kafka wrote "As a father you have. beer, too strong for me. particularly Rase my orothers died when, they were smat and my sisters only came along much later. so that I alone had to bear the brunt of it—and for that I was such too weak " L domination. implied" Yet. here a more of Kafka to father. "It is also true that you hardly ever really gave me a whipping. But the shouting. the way your face got red. the hasty undoing of the braces and laying them ready over the back of the chair. all that was almost worse for me I: is as if someone is going to be hanged. If he really is nari2est: then he is dead and it's all over. But if he is to go, through al: the preliminaries to being hanged and fit learns of his reprieve only when the noose is dangling Defore his face. he may suffer from it all his life. Besides, frorr., the many occasions or which I had. according to your clearly expressed opinion: deserved a whipping but was le: off a: the last moment by your grace. I again accumulated only a huge sense of guilt. On every side I was to blame I was in your debt." It numerous ways. the Kafka letter raises questions: how are parents to act" Is there need for a new pedagogy Ir. family relations And what about the Jewish element it, a family quarrel' Kafrfa touches upon that. He wrote to nit father: "I found as little escape from you in Judaism. Here some measure of escape would have been thinkable in principle. moreover. it would have been thinkable that we might both have found each other in Judaism or that we even migh: have begun from there in harmony. But what son of Judaism was it that I got from you? In the course of the years. I have taken roughly three different attitudes to it. "As a child I reproached myself, in accord with you. for not going to the synagogue often enough. for not fasting. and so on. I though: that in this way I was doing a wrong not to myself but to you. and I was penetrated by a sense of gull: . . "Later. as a young man. I could not understand how. witr the insignificant scrap of Judaism you yourself pos- sessed. you could reproach me for not making an effort for the sake of piety at least. as you put its to cling to a similar. insignificant scrap It was indeed. as far as I could see. a mere nothing, a joke—not even a joke. Four days a year you went to the synagogue. where you were, to say the least closer to the indifferent than to those who took is seriously. patiently went through the prayers as a formality, sometimes amazed me by being able to show me in the prayer both: the passage that was being said at the moment. 'and for the rest. so long as I was present in the synagogue rand this was the main thing I was allowed to hang about wherever I liked. And so I yawned and dozed through the many hours (I don't think I was ever again so bored. except later at dancing lessons) and did my best to enjoy the few little bits of variety there were. as for instance when the Ark of the Convenant was -opened. which always reminded me of the shooting galleries where a cupboard door would open in the same way whenever one hi: a bull's eye: except that there something always came out and here it was always just the same old dolls without heads. Incidentally. it was also very frightening for me there, not only. as goes without saying, because of all the people who came into close contact with, but also because you once mentioned in passing that I too might, be called to the Tora. This was something I dreaded for years. But otherwise I was not fundamentally dis- turbed by my boredom, unless it was by the bar miteva, but that demanded no more than some ridiculous memos= izing. in other words,.it led to nothing but some ridiculous passing of an examination . . . That's how it was in the synagogue: at home it was. if possible, even poorer, being confined to the first Seder. which more and more devel- oped into a farce. with fits of hysterical laughter, ad- mittedly under the influence of the growing children. (Why did you have to give away to that influence? Because you had brought it about) . . "Still later. I did see it again diffe•eht15 and realized why' it was possible for you to think that I in this respect too I was malevolently betraying you. You really had brought some traces of Judaism with you from the ghetto- like village community, it was not much and it dwindled a little more in the city and during your military service- but still, the impression and the memories of your youth did just about suffice for some sort of Jewish life, espe- Cialb- since you did not need much help of that kind, but came of robust stock and could personally scarcely be shaken by religious scruples unless they were strongly mixed with social scruples. At bottom the faith that ruled your life consisted in your believing in the unconditional rightness of the opinions of a certain class of Jewish society . .. Even in this there was - still Judaism enough, but it was too little to be handed on to the child; it all dribbled away' while you were patting it on. In part, it was youthful memories that could not be passed on to others; in part. it was your dreaded personality. It was also impossible to make a child. overacutely observant from sheer nervousness. understand that the few flimsy ges- tures you performed it the name of Judaism, and with an indifference in keeping with their flimsiness. could have any higher meaning. . ." fineh is the challenge, and the indictment, of the By Philip Slomovitz every eminent Cze•h-Jewish writer Franz Kafka (1883- 19'41) who was 36 when he wrote "Letter to His Father." II.' qualified the above statements by declaring: "Had mepnle % %s r o t u e your Judaism been stronger,.yo.,tu Reexath l d about li ri- egst in Judaism, but because of his lbois".1:iot ir iw i.';e:t7 Pienite father's opposition to being a writer there must have emerged that enmity; and on this score Kafka stated in his letter: -.through my intervention Judaism be. a yish havnetrm itin ean gst i.tonureins ..anie abhorrent to you, J rn eo adaisbted le; they 'nauseated' you. This that only that Judaism which you have shown me ou beyond sv it ' there t he in was childhood was the right one, and ays nothing . It was ille. maord-r in which the father treated Kafka's !orations. his approach to marriage. the sneers writ di at his way of meeting a Jewish girl—these are part of a son's indictment of his father. Franz anticipated a rejoinder, even without his father seeing his letter. It is through the rejoinder that he sought "new material to the characterization of our relationship," a way to "reas- ,seiasr ieerus both a little and make our living and our dying In the light of interminable father-son conflicts, in view of the Jewish element in Kafka, the Letter is sign- ificant. It provides means of studying relationships, rea- sons for probing approaches to good family kinships, the need for a new pedagogical approach to Jewish living, to exemplary Jewish training. to the observances that should command respect .rather than arouse the resentments and create the indignities reflected in the Kafka Letter. That document is well worth studying—and Jewish pedagogueS should apply its lessons properly. A Significant Statement by Robert Gordis There is an important comment on the youth-elders relationships in Dr. Robert Gordis' great work, "Judaism in a Christian World" published by The Grand Hill. From the chapter on "Intermarriage" we quote: Emphasizing the welfare of the individual means much more than giving statistics on intermarriage, the higher number of divorces, or the low fertility rates of intermarried couples. It means highlighting the injury to their psychological health and to their moral stan- dards which is invoked in forsaking their own people. It means revealing the intellectual and spiritual im- poverishment of their lives entailed by intermarriage, which generally cuts them off from the Jewish heritage. When the young people say to me, "Well. our parents do not know Judaism themselves," the answer should be, -All the more reason why you must explore it for yourself before abandoning it." Another observation may be added. It often hap- pens that a youngster contemplating intermarriage says, "I don't know why my parents are so disturbed. They never gave me a Jewish education. They do not practice the Jewish religion in the home. They were never the least bit interested in Jewish culture and now they're hysterical. They don't know why they object. They are either hypocritical or prejudiced or both. They are thoroughly unreasonable. I do not see why I should give up something precious to me." The contention is highly reasonable—but it fails to reckon with what lies beyond reason. The response would be somewhat as follows: "It is true your parents do not know what to say to you. But behind their apparently irrational attitude is something far deeper than logic. What is involved here is one of the basic drives of human nature, the dread of annihilation, the passionate desire for immortality. Whether or not we believe in im- mortality beyond the grave, we all know that we attain to immortality in this world through our children. When your parents contemplate the possibility of your marry- . ing outside the fold. and reallYp that their grandchildren . will no longer be Jews, it is the end as far as they are concerned. If they sound hysterical, it is because they are faced by the specter of their own extinction. They cannot put their fear into words for you. they are not even consciously aware of what impeli them, but it is as deep as the instinct of sell-preserva- tion. There lies the source of their agony." Experience testifies that in several instances this approach made an impression so sensitive young people, who were made to realize that their parents were not merely expressing some narrow prejudice or indulging a dislike or contempt foe the alien. It suddenly became ely ear es r to them e irhamk that they literally held their Parents' fiver their There is need for re-establishing the closeness between parents and children, to re-affirm the family relationships which have assumed proverbial dignity in the thinking of our naet neighbors. Butis often an aloofness that staggers times There is an example in an interpretation of Susan Sontag and her "Notes on Camp" that attracted wide attention. Wins Sontag was quoted in a recent article as eommenting on her parents: "They are nice enough, but for Jewish parents they lack that Jewish warmth we all bear about. The fact is, I am a little sad about our relationship. They seem to regard me as something of an oddity, and my writing and what you might call in,v present success leave them un- moved and unresponsive. I s-uppose they find it's all very n a n i ede..pbu ut zzie s s vh ine en .,, I think about it, their aloofness disturbs Franz Kafka put it in much stronger language. He . was bitter. He protted. He condemned, indicted, chal- leng.ed his father. Both in their ways seem to be saying that there is another way. Which means that while youth is groping it also asks for understanding, for acceptance— and when it seeks Jewish values it desires them on a high level . Wleevsetould find a way of pr es enting them on the highest APHI 21, 1947 THE DETROIT JEWISH NEWS