In Lighter Vein

By JACOB RICHMAN

AJP Feature

Goliath of the Bronx
The Bronx Park Express was
running at top speed, carrying
the weary toilers home. Above
the deafening clatter of the
wheels rose the stentorian
voice of a stalwart, red-haired,
ferocious - looking individual,
who appeared at the rear en-
trance of the car.
"Any Jews in this car?" bel-
lowed the strapping man.
The question was ridiculous.
It would have been more sen-
sible to ask: "Any Gentiles in
this car?" Yet it was asked.
And what is even stranger, no
response came. The gigantic
proportions of the inquiring
person, his stern face and bel-
ligerent manner, made every
Israelite in the car think thrice
before acknowledging his na-
tionality. It was more than evi-
dent that this Brobdingagian,
bellicose personage was just
hankering for a chance to kill
a couple of Jews.
"Any Jews here?" boomed
the voice, louder and more ter-
rifying than before.
A sepulchral silence was the
reply.
"Don't be cowards," roared
the titan. "If there is any Jew
here, let him stand up like a
man and admit it."
One young Jewish fellow was
particularly stung by this inso-
lent challenge. To be sure, he
was no match for the towering
monster; but his racial pride
got the best of him; and he de-
cided to risk his life for the
honor of his people. Besides, his
best girl was sitting next to
him, and he wanted to show her
that he was a brave man and
a proud. Jew.
"I am a Jew!" blurted out the
brave coreligionist of David, as
he rose from his seat, pale like
a ghost, glaring defiantly at
the blaspheming Goliath. "I
am a Jew, what of it?"
There was a moment of tense
silence. A desperate grapple,
which would probably end in
the murder of the frail Jewish
fellow, seemed , inevitable.
"Well, if you are a Jew,"
finally said the colossus, "step
into the next car. You see, to-
day is the anniversary of my
father's death, and I want to
say `kaddish.' But there are
only nine Jews in the other car,
and I need one more Jew to
make a `minyan.' I am afraid
before I get to the Bronx all
the synagogs will be closed."
* * *
At The Threshhold
An old inveterate "apikoros,"
or heretic, was seriously ill and
he sent for the rabbi to say con-
fession and to do penance.
"I can't understand," said a
young disciple of the expiring
man, "how a brave convinced
`apikoros' like you, should all
of a sudden go back on his
theories and principles."
"Don't you see?" said the
atheist, "by that I want to dis-
prove the Talmudic dogma that
`The wicked do not repent even
at the threshold of Gehenna.' "

.

(From 372-page book, "Laughs
From Jewish Lore"—Hebrew Pub-
lishing Company, 77 Delancey Street,
N.Y. 2, N.Y.)

Protest 'Madonna' 'Card
Prepared by UNICEF

UNITED NATIONS, (AJP)—

A number of non - Christian

•

groups issued a protest against
UNICEF (United Nations Chil-
dren Fund), one of the Special-
ized UN Agencies, for its re-
lease of a religious holiday card
portraying a Madonna with a
child.
A spokesman for one of the
groups held that, since UNICEF
is a strictly humanitarian agen-
ey dealing with all races and
creeds, it had no right to impose
a Christmas card unacceptable
to the millions of non-Christians
the Agency serves in the vari-
ous regions of the world. The
Madonna and Child card is one
of a series issued by UNICEF.
All the others are of a non-
1 eligious nature.

Brandeis Professor
Deciphers Ancient
Tablets from Crete

Israel Bond Irrigation Projects
Increase Agricultural Production

WALTHAM, Mass., (JTA) —
Dr. Cyrus H. Gordon, professor
of Near Eastern Studies. at
Brandeis University, has de-
ciphered a system of writing
used on tablets on the Mediter-
ranean island of Crete, about
3,600 years ago, tracing the re-
lationship of the ancient script
to an early Semitic language.
The language on the tablets
has been a mystery to scientists
for many years. Now Dr. Gor-
don has announced that his de-
coding of the pictographs and
syllabic signs on the Cretan
tablets shows the language used
was Akkadian, a tongue tracing
back to ancient Babylon.

M

LONDON (JTA) — Holiday-
ing Britons at Brighton on the
southern seacoast were greeted
with a series of anti-Semitic O
and pro-Fascist slogans daubed
in tar on public places in the
residential town.
A tall stone marker on the
town boundary was defaced
with the slogan: "Jews Out! To
the Brighton Ghetto." The com-
panion marker on the other
side of the road served as a on
blackboard for: "To British and
German Dead in 1939-1945." Zi
Elsewhere in town were to_ be
found slogans like "Hitler was 43
Right" and a number of swas-
tikas and Fascist symbols. co
Police investigating the van- I g;
dalisms have not yet been able i a
to turn up any one who saw
the slogans being painted. The 11
road into and out of the city Ott
is rarely empty and the sea- CO
. side promenade on which one .61
slogan was painted is thronged
with people except in the dead
of night.

az

WIC Issues Full Translation
of German Restitution Law

A full translation of the new
West German Federal Restitu-
tion Law, effective as of July
19, 1957, has been issued by the
World Jewish Congress' Insti-
tute of Jewish Affairs in New
York.
The $360,000,000 law lays
down the procedure by which
victims of Nazism may file
claims for homes, property and
other holdings seized by the
Nazis.
Copies of the 23-page trans-
lation of the law are available
on application to the Institute
of Jewish Affairs, World Jew-
ish Congress, 15 E. 84th St., New
York 28, at 50 -cents per copy.

Police Investigating
Anti-Semitic Slogans
in Resort in Britain

r,

Israel's farm production is increasing steadily through the
use of Israel Development Bond funds. During the past nine
years, the value of Israel's annual agricultural output has risen
from $75,000,000 to more than $300,000,000. One of the major
reasons for this production increase has been the construction
of vital irrigation and deep-well water projects throughout the
country. These projects, supported by Israel Bond capital, were
built with the aid of pipes made at the Yuval Gad Pipe Mann-
facttiking Company in Askelon. The Yuval Gad plant (a por-
tion of whose operations is shown above) is the largest pre-
stressed concrete pipe factory in the world, making pipes as
large as 66 inches in diameter. Yuval Gad has been aided by
Israel Bonds.

Max Stork Named Chilean
Consul in Holland

AMSTERDAM, (JTA) Max
Stork, a Jewish businessman
who lived for many years in
Santiago de Chile, has been ap-
pointed Chilean Consul. here.

Be not simply good. Be good
for something.
—Thoreau

To Be SURE ...

TAKE THIS TO THE POLLS
ON TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 10

Don't waste your vote on candidates
whose names look like the names you
mean to vote for!

FOR A BETTER DETROIT . • •
ELECT THE BEST CANDIDATES TO
DETROIT'S HIGHEST OFFICES!!

For MAYOR

10 LOUIS C. MIRIANI

For CITY CLERK

15 EDWARD H. JEFFRIES

For COMMON COUNCIL

EI

35 ED CAREY

(State Representative)

25 MARY V. BECK

Ei 38 EDWARD CONNOR

65 STANLEY NOVAK

Ej 69 WILLIAM T. PATRICK, Jr.

(Legislative Agent)

(Attorney-at-Law)

EC] 60 JAMES H. LINCOLN IS] 89 EUGENE I. VAN ANTWERP

ENDORSED By Labor and Civic Groups

To Be SURE ...

VOTE BY BALLOT NUMBER!!
TUES., SEPT. 10 ...ADVOCATES FOR BETTER GOVERNMENT