Friday, September 12, 1947,

'DETROIT JEWISH CHRONICLE

Dorothy Parker,
Queen of Satire

Wald now Swivel • -nneLtewo

31 263,000 COPIE5
of SHOLft1 ALLIC416
wRaIRQS WERE

Her Biting Quips
Are World Famous

PUBLISIAED IN RUSSIA.
BETWEEN 1'135-M95.
HALF WEig IN
THE REST WERE,IN
RIASIAN,uKRANIAN,BELO.

By ELYEII NATIIANS

WITH THE QUEEN of pungent
" satire back in the thick of
things again, we can expect now
RUSSIAN, AIEROAI JAN IAN,
ARMENIAN, TAO IIK , POLISH,
a deluge of Dorothy Parkerisms.
BuL4ARIAN,moLDAvIAN
When Mrs. Parker lances a shaft
AND 4ERMAN
•
at her victim, the world knows
, •
of it.
1
1
While she was in Hollywood,
10
Mrs. Parker's voice was frequent-
ly mute, but the bon vivants of
New York are more hopeful now
that they have word of her re-
turn.
Few persons have a more se-
e reputation for jest and bit-
wit than this slim and dark-
(4off-5
514111.1
aired Jewish woman. It is a
just reputation. She proved it
5cHgfi6fg•(soltte,re6) DIM IttIS9)
when asked to comment on Ruth
AUTHOR AND RAll' IN 4ERMANY4
Gordon's • play Over Twenty-
ENTERED A YESHIVAH IN
FRANK.FoRT AT THE At. 011 9.
One" whose heroine was a take-
dff on Mrs. Parker.
"I suppose that if I ever write
I play about myself now," she othy Parker can make .a fool im- You may be right."
commented, "I'd be sued for pla- mortal with a jibe."
. --0—
giarism," •
But Mrs. Parker has her more
THE PERFECT
PERFECT EXAMPLE of genial moments. This story about
i HER DEVASTATING criticisms
ore world-famous. To those who her deadly wit is reflected in her is vouched for by the dentist
want to remember them, and to this following story. At a cer- in question. It seems she was in
those who never hear them be-. tain dinner-party she entered the his office one day while another
fore, we offer.. the following rpom beside a publisher's wife patient argued over the cost of a
samples: . • who had said some nasty words gold inlay. The dentist asked for
$90.
Of the play The House Beau- about "Jewish interlopers."
tiful" she said simply: "It is the
The publisher's wife stepped
play lousy."
aside. "Age before beauty," she
Rosh Hashonah Greetings
She dissected Edith Wharton's
said cattily.
life story autobiography with, this
Mrs. Parker beamed agreement.
caustic title: "Edie Was a Lady."
S. ROYSTER
Another book she read must "Pearls before swine," she said
MOVING
and STORAGE
sweetly
and
Went
ahead,
enjoy-
have been a gift book, said Mrs.
"Anytime — Anywhere"
Parker, "No one would accept it ing her dinner heartily.
—0--
Every Load Insured
under any other terms."
Famed writer Somerset Mau-
AS MANY OF HER writings
2944 Hanley
gham has an extravagently high are controversial, Mrs. Parker has
opinion of Mrs. Parker. "Helen figured out a happy formula to
MA. 7564.7752-2473
could make a scholar immortal answer letters. To all blasts, she
with a kiss," he said, but Dor- replied, "Dear (Sir) or (Madam):

1

-

01

-1
,

.9,

J.

- Page Thirteen

"Can't you make it $80?" she
begged.
Then she asked for her total
bill. It was $130.
"Can't you make it $110?" she
pleaded.
Finally, she asked the dentist
what time he wanted her tomor-
row. "Eleven-thirty, said the
doctor.
Mrs. Parker answered for the
surprised patient. "Can't you
make it ten-thirty?" she asked.
—o—
MRS. PARKER, it goes without
saying, is a mistress of outrag-
eous pun. Of a minister making
a long-distance call, she said that
his was a parson-to-parson call.
She has a great hatred for the
commercial dosages which ac-
company radio programs. If she
ever goes on the air, she prom-
ises, her sponsor will be the
manufacturer of Lumpo Soap.
It doesn't lather. It doesn't
float. It contains no secret oil.
It just keeps you company in
the tub.

Passover Buying
Is Started by JDC

NEW YORK, N. Y.—To provide
the necessary foods and other
supplies to make it possible for
every,Jewish survivor in Europe
to celebrate Passover, 1948, the
Joint Distribution Committee has
already embarked on its Passover
purchasing program.
Orders have been placed for
two million pounds of matzoh,
five hundred thousand pounds of
matzoh meal, and 2,200,000 pounds
of wheat. The wheat will be sent
into Germany for conversion into
flour, from which matzoh will be
baked.
As in 1946, it is expected that
JDC orders for matzoh will re-
quire full-time production facili-
ties of all major matzoh-produc-
ing companies in this country.
For the 1947 observance of
Passover, the JDC shipped more
than 6,000,000 pounds of Passover
supplies to 14 European countries.

ROSH HASHONAH GREETINGS

Ira ilson and Sons
Dairy Company

"Owned and Operated by Detroitors"

5255 Tillman Ave.

5255 Tillman Avenue
East Branch 23200 Hoover, Van Dyke

ROSH HASHONAH GREETINGS

And Our Sincere Wishes To You All

Mr. and Mrs. Max Greenberg

Mr. and Mrs. Russell Greenberg

and Son, Roy Frank

WYOMING PLUMBING
AND HEATING SUPPLIES

14600 WYOMING

A HAPPY
NEW YEAR!

To our many friends everywhere, we convey

the traditional greeting of the season:

New Year's Greetings

-"L'Shonab Tovab Tikosevu!"

• AND' BEST: WISHES . :

May you be 'inscribed for a good year!

'TO-DETROIT JEWRY

COPCO

STEEL and ENGINEERING CO.

14035 GRAND RIVER

DETROIT

TY. 5.6000
TY. 5.6000
PR. 7474

